DC : Crisis of infinite hunger : Arc 1 - Epilogue 2

Epilogue 2 : Beware my hunger

A green glow flared through the darkened apartment as the emerald energy of an incoming transport bathed the cluttered living space in an eerie radiance. In the center of the room, a couch groaned under the considerable weight of Hal Jordan, who was lounging in his Green Lantern uniform—though it was a miracle the skintight material still held together over his overblown frame. His once-athletic form had ballooned to ridiculous proportions, his gut spilling out onto his lap, thighs thick enough to press against the armrests, his arms thick and flabby. Yet Hal, ever the cocky pilot, didn’t seem to mind.

His emerald ring glowed as a construct in the shape of a hand levitated a box of donuts in front of him, steadily feeding him bite after bite without him even having to lift a finger. He chewed lazily, eyes half-lidded, seemingly unbothered by the sheer absurdity of his predicament.

Then came the unwelcome interruption.

With a burst of green light, John Stewart, Guy Gardner, and Jessica Cruz made their way into the apartment, their expressions ranging from concern to barely concealed amusement. The trio took in the sight before them—Hal Jordan, once one of the most daring and fearless Lanterns in the Corps, now an absolute behemoth of a man, looking far more interested in stuffing his face than patrolling the sectors of space.

For a moment, there was stunned silence.

Then, Guy burst out laughing.

"HOLY HELL, JORDAN!" he guffawed, doubling over, clutching his stomach as he pointed at Hal. "I was expectin’ you to be slackin’, but damn, buddy, you look like a blimp! What, you been testing how many donuts a power ring can deliver per second?!"

Hal rolled his eyes, his mouth still full. "Nice to see you too, Guy," he muttered around a bite, reaching for another donut—only for the construct to stuff it in for him.

Jessica grimaced, her arms crossed. "Seriously, Guy? Cut it out."

Guy wiped a fake tear from his eye, still grinning. "Nah, no way, Jess, this is too good." He sauntered forward, planting himself in front of Hal before dramatically leaning down, smirking. "C’mon, man, what the hell happened? This ain't just a little weight gain, this is full-on ‘retirement home after decades of eating TV dinners’ levels of fat."

John sighed, rubbing his temples. "Enough, Gardner. Hal, what’s going on with you? This isn’t normal. We’ve been trying to reach you, and the Guardians are wondering why you haven’t reported in."

Hal smirked, licking powdered sugar off his lips. "Relax, John. I’ve got it handled. I just needed a little break. You know, R&R. Not like the universe is gonna fall apart without me."

John narrowed his eyes. "You needed a break?" He exhaled sharply, clearly not buying it. "Hal, this is serious. You’ve let yourself go big time—literally. The Guardians are getting worried, and frankly, so am I."

"Don’t be," Hal replied, waving a dismissive hand. "I’m fine."

Guy snickered. "Yeah, you look real fine, pal." Then, with his usual reckless bravado, he reached down and grabbed a handful of Hal’s gut, giving it a hard squeeze. "Damn, look at this! You got more rolls than a bakery!"

A sharp shiver ran up Guy’s spine as he did so. Unbeknownst to him, the virus surged into his system at that very moment. His rock-solid physique, sculpted from years of fighting and brawling, softened almost instantly. His uniform stretched ever so slightly as muscle burned into fat, his arms rounding out, his chest thickening, and his gut pressing slightly against his belt.

Guy blinked, his cocky smirk wavered for the briefest second as a sudden pang of hunger hit him.

But he quickly masked it, snatching the donut box right from Hal’s floating construct. "Y’know what? You definitely don’t need all this." He popped a donut into his mouth without hesitation, chewing as he spoke. "Consider this an intervention, buddy. I’m savin’ you from yourself."

Jessica’s eyes widened in disgust. "Oh my God, Guy, really? You’re just gonna take his food?"

Guy, already shoving a donut in his mouth, shrugged. "Hey, fair’s fair. He’s clearly had enough."

John, watching Guy stuff his face, scowled. "You’re not helping."

"Relax, Johnny-boy," Guy said through a mouthful. "We’re just messin’ around—ain’t like I’m gonna turn into him overnight."

John ignored him and instead stepped forward, his expression serious as he placed a firm hand on Hal’s shoulder. "Hal. Listen to me. If something’s wrong, you can tell us. We’re here to help you sort this out."

As the words left his mouth, the same insidious infection took hold. John Stewart, always disciplined and composed, didn’t notice the subtle shift at first—the slow burn of his muscle softening, the way his lower half started to feel heavier. The sturdy, chiseled build of a soldier was melting away, his legs thickening, his backside rounding out with newfound weight.

Hal, utterly unaware of what was happening, simply smirked. "You guys are blowing this way outta proportion," he said, shifting his bulk slightly to sit up. "I’ve got it under control. I’ve got a Justice League meeting coming up soon anyway, so, y’know, back to business as usual."

Guy snorted, still munching away, his own frame visibly plumper now. "Pfft. Betcha Batman’s gonna have a heart attack when he sees you roll in lookin’ like a Macy’s parade float."

John, still unaware of his own growing figure, shot Guy a glare. "Cut it out, Gardner." Then, without thinking, he grabbed a donut from the box in Guy’s hand and took a bite. "We’re leaving. Hal, get your act together."

Jessica, watching the whole thing unfold, frowned deeply. Something felt off —the way Guy was eating like he couldn’t stop, how John’s stance seemed heavier, the way Hal was acting so indifferent.

Something was seriously wrong here.

As the three Lanterns prepared to leave, Hal leaned back, arms stretching behind his head, an amused smirk on his face. "Yeah, yeah. I'll see you guys soon. Try not to miss me too much."

Guy, still chewing, patted his growing belly absentmindedly. "Man, don’t take too long, or I might just take your spot as Earth's favorite Lantern."

John, still authoritative despite the subtle roundness creeping into his form, narrowed his eyes. "You’re already pushing it, Gardner. Let’s move."

Jessica, arms crossed, shook her head, muttering under her breath. "This is so messed up."

And with that, the green light flared once more, the trio vanishing into the night—unknowing that two of them had just been sentenced to the same insatiable fate as their former wingman.

Hal smirked to himself, grabbing another donut.

Business as usual.