Writing style fixing
Added 2023-05-26 09:58:59 +0000 UTCI playtested the game and identifying the problems. I can see it can cause a huge confusion.
I apologize for being a crappy writer. I think I will do this kind of style to differentiate who is actually in control of the body.
This way, people can notify me if it's out of character for both Sanako and Ayako.
Since I am planning in for Sanako is:
NTS
- She enjoying the situation of being a futa and eventually got even more horny and perverted.
- She is more to exhibitionism later on where Jack watching excites her even more.
NTR
- She started to listen every bidding of Sayako and eventually listen to her every “commands”.
- She will find the immoral and stealing other person they cares about is turning her even more rather than being a pure exhibitionism.
Ayako is:
NTS
- At first, she is a bit reluctant of having a dick and making a move on the girls. But had to go along with Sanako and Jack perversion.
- She tries to hide her perverted side but eventually, she is into more rough sex and more to dominating type. But she won’t resort to do it when it is against her own morals.
NTR
- At first, she tries to fight Sayako temptation and eventually fall to such temptation. Which leads her to cooperate with Sanako.
- She is willing to use any means necessary to make all the girl hers, seduce the girls and started to share her plans with Sanako on how to get the girls theirs.
Comments
to be perfectly honest, this is my first experience doing a netorare and netorase work, XD. But yeah, that early version is more to proof of concept. But the way I am doing is kind of fast pace a bit. 3-4 foreplay for main sex scene then it will be penetration. Since currently, I am focusing on making content on the main one first then I will add some side later on.
Paradox V
2023-05-31 15:44:56 +0000 UTCJust threw some money at you to say that I really like the direction the game is going. And I hope you work on both routes with equal passion. I was about to ignore this game since I played the early version before the revamp and it just didn't grab me at all(Not sure if it was even shared by you personally- or leaked).. but this new version is very promising. Personally a big fan of the NTR route- with the mystery perspective and teasing which I feel is the true impact and essence of the genre- that too many developers tend to skim over developing and making effective. If you can create an entire game and keep the dialogue hinting and erotic without scenes- then find places to add those scenes in the middle- you would know you succeeded in that perspective. Without the opportunity to show full force hcontent and needing to hide faces and angles.. The visual ero content might be less on the NTR route- but it is in no way less tantalizing.. I'd argue it's way more as it lets you imagination fill in the blanks. Anyway. Please don't listen to anyone trying to change your plans for the NTR route- the people that have problems with it are a very loud minority and it will have plenty of fans. Create what you want to create- incorporate actual good feedback into your ideas- ignore the voices that just want to remove content or change it drastically so that it doesn't fit well with the routes purpose. I'll keep watching this.
D0
2023-05-31 13:34:38 +0000 UTCOk :D i think the translating gave you wrong words. xD
Josh Makkara
2023-05-28 08:16:30 +0000 UTCThe ntr route is very much my favorite. I am not looking forward to it.
一 西田
2023-05-28 03:38:48 +0000 UTCI like your game and writing. :)
Josh Makkara
2023-05-26 13:19:14 +0000 UTCYour willing to fix your writing already makes you better if you want to see writing so bad they need a reboot then watch RWBY and you will see bad writing too high degree
Mugen mao
2023-05-26 11:14:56 +0000 UTCI don't think you are a "crappy" writer. Your acknowledgement of your weak points and willingness to rectify them would make me say the opposite ;-)
Roland Taranis
2023-05-26 10:11:30 +0000 UTC
