The True Plot of the Monster Hunter Movie (VIDEO SCRIPT)

Raise your hand if you wouldn’t be able to eat a god-damn thing that’s cooked in the Monster Hunter universe because it was made by cats and you would literally die (raises hand). Sucks to be me, I know...

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Readers, I have a genuine question I want to ask. Just something that’s been plaguing my mind for the longest time right now. (Pause) What’s the point of trailer teasers?

Ever since they got REAL popular going back as far as -- oh, I don’t know -- Iron Man 3, the concept of a small teaser promoting the upcoming release of the teaser trailer for an upcoming movie started to become a huge fad all of a sudden

And it wasn’t even the fact that the trailer teasers were teasing the release of a full-fledged trailer in most cases. Sometimes the trailer teasers teased the teaser TRAILER! Like what the...wha...wh-WHY???

Are we as a society not patient enough to wait another whole-ass day for the 1:30 - 2 minute worth of footage that’s actually SUPPOSED to get us hype for the movie to come out, that we’re fine with a 30 to 45 second pacifier?

And yes, I already know the answer is yes because human beings are spoiled self-entitled assholes. But sometimes I like to think that we’re better than that! Which, once again, I already know!

With that being said, I do my best to avoid watching trailer teasers when they come out. Mostly because when they’re released, it usually means the ACTUAL trailer wasn’t that far behind.

But apparently 2020 is just constantly throwing curveballs at us. Because director Paul W.S. Anderson’s next video game adaptation MOnster Hunter released ITS trailer teaser during the first week of October 2020, but has as of this recording has NOT released the full-fledged trailer for it.

Instead, there are videos CALLING themselves the trailer for the Monster Hunter movie, but those are more along the lines of behind-the-scenes snippets with new footage thrown in here and there. So the trailer teaser for the eventual teaser trailer is the only “trailer” we have.

Now if you’ve seen the video I made on W.S. Anderson’s Resident Evil series, then you know that to a certain extent, those movies are a bit of a guilty pleasure for me.

Yes, I know Anderson is to Mila as Burton was to Helena Broham Carter.

Yes, I know that the series just did its own thing after Apocalypse

But one of the things that I secretly enjoyed about the movies -- especially after I came of age to follow the story of the video games and not have to worry about having nightmares immediately afterward -- is that it was able to take elements from the video games and be its own thing.

Especially after watching a 2 hour video explaining the video game timeline of Resident Evil up until RE 7: End of Zoe

Not only did they have no choice BUT to separate the movies from the games, but GOD DAMN. Y’all can NEVER make fun of Kingdom Hearts’ timeline ever again.

So when I found out that Anderson’s next capcom adaptation was Monster Hunter -- especially getting off the Monster Hunter: World high -- I was interested...in seeing how Milla Jovovich was gonna participate.

And after seeing set pieces...pretty accurate costume design, and realizing that all we’re getting is the trailer teaser to the teaser trailer more than likely thanks to the current health and safety crisis, I sucked it up and decided to watch the trailer teaser

What I saw was a VERY good looking Black Diablos, holy SHIT

But more importantly, I saw exactly what the plot hook and the genre was going to possibly be.

The live-action Monster Hunter movie...is an ISEKAI (laughs and screams)

For those of you who aren’t weeb adjacent, the world Isekai is Japanese for different world or otherworld, and there’s an entire subgenre of it in anime and manga.

Usually the protagonist or the protagonist and their posse is transported to either a world in a different universe, a fictional world in a book, movie, or game, or an anthropomorphic visualization of something mundane in our world that we take for granted. From there, they have to either learn to live in this new world, or quest to find their way back home.

I was not introduced to this concept through anime, however. I -- like probably a few of you -- was introduced to it in the form of two western productions.

Disney’s 1982 classic Tron, and the animated series Arthur and the Knights of Justice

...What? I was born in 1988; I don’t know what you want from me.

Just be glad I didn’t say that the western show that first introduced it to me was the animated Dungeons and Dragons series

I wasn’t introduced to the concept being used for anime until 90’s Toonami started to air the first isekai anime I’ve ever seen, called Dot Hack Sign. And even then, I didn’t even know there was a term for it.

So, because the plot was similar to how it was in Tron, I just called it and every OTHER anime like it “Tron Anime.” Because it was like TRON

It wasn’t until the first season of Sword Art Online came out that I learned about the concept of Isekai proper, and also learned that the Isekai genre...is COMPLETELY oversaturated!

Like, ever since then, there’s just been SO MUCH ISEKAI!

RE:Zero. The Time I Got Reincarnated as a Slime. Hataage! Kemono Michi. There’s just so muc isekai now that there are now enough of it for them to have their own subgenres

And because one of my good friends decided to monetize my ability to not watch every and all anime under the sun -- check out our podcast The Weeb and the Normie wherever you stream -- I am damn near Isekai’d out.

Now I know what you’re thinking

But La’Ron, what about the trailer teaser for the live-action Monster Hunter movie told you that this is gonna be Isekai?

Well, Readers, its quite simple if you pay attention.

If you’ve noticed in the stills that were produced about the movie before the trailer came out -- hell; even in the teaser poster for the movie -- you’d notice that Milla’s character is decked out in the traditional gear you’d see a character dressed in a Monster Hunter game. Armor, a bladed weapon, the grappling hook on her wrist; the whole nine yards.

But in the actual trailer teaser encountering the Black Diablos for the first time, we see her -- and her posse -- in the desert, dressed in modern day military gear and in an armed Humvee.

Also, the ACTUAL Monster Hunter -- aka the Field Team Leader from Monster Hunter World -- that’s with her in the early stills we see of her character dressed appropriately, is nowhere near her and her troop when they encounter the Diablos in the trailer

Which tells me that she and her squad meets up with the Field Team Leader later on, learns about where they are, and goes about searching for a way home

Or, y’know, just stay there and have all of their meals cooked by adorable cat furries

Like I said, Readers; the combination of my curiosity and the fact that his Resident Evil films are just dumb fun at the end of the day leave me interested in seeing how this Monster Hunter movie is gonna go

/Also, I really appreciate that he’s working with the game creators to make sure that they get the look of the creatures and armor specs right, which according to how Diablos and Rathalos look from the preview, they’ve definitely succeeded./

Also, considering the cast of characters that are part of Milla Jovovich’s initial group and the actors portraying them, something tells me there was ALWAYS going to be an American aspect to this film. So having a group of 5 or so US or US-adjacent soldiers be transported to the Monster Hunter universe feels like the only way to go about tackling the premise given the skillset

Then again, maybe there IS another way to tackle it! Which is why Readers, your homework assignment for the day is to write in the comment section below how YOU would handle the plot of the live-action Monster Hunter movie, without making it an Isekai

Or, if you feel like sharing with the rest of the class, why you think an Isekai angle is the only way this could work

Whichever you decide to answer, I’d love to know your thoughts