Backyard Dungeon 5 Chapter 1

I watched the edge of the growth of magical crystal while the Gnome harvesters were busy at their task. We would need the powerful shards for their mystical properties in the fight against Ursenegr, and Ekneme had asked Nileme, Amrila, and I to watch over the family of Gnomish specialists while they gathered crystals because there had been an uptick in monster activity over the last few days.

The Gnomes all carried baskets that they wore on their backs, and they used small hammers and chisels to chip off sizable chunks from the living pillars of jagged crystals that grew here like trees. The Crystal Forest was an incredible sight, and even as I listened for the scitter of carrion beetles, or the beat of Nictor wings, I took a moment to enjoy it.

Amrila was several yards away to the north west and looked like she was bored out of her mind, while Nileme watched for threats to the south east of me. The Gnomes all worked in the center of the little circle we’d made, and the tinkling sound of their hammers filled the cavern around us. I enjoyed the musical sound, but I was also bored out of my mind.

“I think we should order in tonight,” the horned woman commented, clearly to break the silence more than anything. “I could really go for some chicken tenders and fries from Rick’s Diner.”

I’d given the Gnomes silicone earplugs and instructed them all to put them in, just in case we needed to start shooting without warning. Wallick, the patriarch and leader of the family of harvesters, had agreed right away. Wallick seemed to be a very practical man and became concerned when I explained to him the dangers of hearing loss from the sound of the rifles, so between the earplugs and the sound of their hammers, it was safe to assume the Gnome couldn’t hear us.

But I’d told the ladies to be careful what we talked about all the same. I didn’t want anyone to say something that would give clues to the way to the surface, but dinner talk seemed safe enough.

“Ibseth says the smell of Rick’s food makes her sick right now,” Nileme replied as she adjusted the strap of her AK.

“We could order from that new steak house,” I suggested in a helpful tone. “That sauce they serve with their fried onions is nuts.”

“But their steak isn’t very good.” Amrila wrinkled her nose as she kicked at a loose pebble on the ground. “I’d much rather have the steak you cook on the grill at home.”

“We could always order appetizers and then grill up some steaks.” I grinned as I shifted my weight from one foot to the other to relieve a cramp that had started in my thigh.

“I like that idea--” the Dolrath princess started to say when we all heard the sound of rockfall.

Nileme turned to look at the edge of the Crystal Forest behind her, where there was a massive dropoff. I stood to attention and grabbed my Galil that hung from a strap across my body, and when some of the Gnomes noticed our sudden, tense movements, they stopped hammering and also watched the edge of the dropoff.

Then there was a shriek so loud it made my Pro X headphones cut out all sound, and I could feel the rumble of the ground underneath my feet. As the Pit Wyrm came up over the edge of the rock cliff, the beat of its huge wings churned the air around us, and the beast shrieked again.

The Gnomes scattered and ran behind me as I stepped forward, charged my rifle, and clicked on the laser to help me aim. Nileme was in the line of my shot, but we had trained enough together that she knew to immediately get out of the way. As the dark-haired Elven woman tucked and rolled to the side, I fired three rounds into the beast’s stomach and chest before it slammed down onto the rockledge and dug its massive claws into the dirt.

Nileme popped up only three yards from the Wyrm and fired two quick rounds into the monster’s feline-like face, and she managed to take out its left eye. Meanwhile, Amrila pulled both of her swords, and she ran past me to put herself between the Gnomes and the winged menace so she could protect the harvesters if the Wyrm got around the princess and me.

The Pit Wyrm whipped its toward Nileme, but the athletic warrior woman nimbly moved behind one of the thick crystal pillars to avoid the snap of the beast’s toothy jaw. I took advantage of the distraction to fire several rounds at the other side of the Wyrm’s large head. One bullet went clear through the fucker’s pointed ear, but the other two hit just under the right eye.

The Wyrm shrieked again, this time in frustration, and then it surged forward on all fours into the Crystal growth while its long, scale and fur covered body snaked behind it. I moved back so the Wyrm didn’t bowl me over, and I took cover behind a large, blue crystal pillar.

As the frantic beast pushed its way through the crystalline pillars, gem spikes shattered and fell from the pillars to break on the ground. Then the Wyrm turned its thin, snake-like body and sniffed the air before it turned to see Amrila with the Gnomes as they huddled behind her. The horned woman grinned as she flourished her swords, and then she ran forward, right at the Wyrm. The beast lowered its head and opened its maw filled with rows of razor sharp teeth, and its head shot forward on a long, serpentine neck.

But my Zencarri wife was ready for that, and she danced out of the way as she turned her body, brought her jeweled sword around, and slashed at the Wyrm’s short snout. The bloodied fucker reared its head back as it howled in pain, and Nileme and I saw our opening.

We almost moved as one as we each stepped out from behind the cover of our separate pillars and fired round after round into the vulnerable hollow of the Wyrm’s jaw. Our bullets tore through the soft flesh and poked holes in the Wyrm’s airways, and the Pit Wyrm began to sputter and cough as it choked on its own blood.

Then the huge monster fell to its side and writhed on the ground, and its thick tail slammed repeatedly against one of the crystal growths and threatened to knock the massive pillar over. I stepped forward, shot three final rounds into the Wyrm’s brainpan, and ended the beast’s suffering.

Once the Pit Wyrm was still for a few moments, and I was sure it was dead, I took my headphones off to signal it was safe.

“I think we’re good,” I said as Wallick and his harvesters pulled out their earplugs and took a few cautious steps forward. “If this ugly fucker has been hanging out around here, I don’t think anything else would want to be in the area. But you should all keep your ear protection handy.”

“Thank you, Shield Brother,” Wallick said a little breathlessly. “That was quite impressive.”

“It was a team effort,” I replied as I smiled proudly at my wives. “Should we move to another part of the forest so you guys can finish up?”

“I think we can get the last of what we need from the shards the beast shattered on the ground,” Wallick answered as he looked around at the shards of crystal scattered around the dead Wyrm. “Rawlin, please gather the monster’s teeth if you will. They could also be useful.”

The tallest Gnome moved over to the Pit Wyrm, and Amrila helped to hold open the beast’s jaws as the lanky Rawlin pulled at the Wyrm’s left canine until it came away with a wet popping sound. The rest of the Gnomes started to gather up the chunks of crystal on the ground, and Nileme and I changed out our mags, in case anything other monster chose to come along.

Once Wallick and the others had gotten all the crystals they needed, the harvesters started in on the Wyrm and skinned off all the hide they could reasonably carry.

They took the title of harvesters very seriously it would seem.

Amrila came to stand with Nileme and I as we watched over the Gnomes, and I considered lending a hand for a moment, but thought better of it. I’d skinned a few deers in my time, but these Gnomes had their work down to a science, and I would have just been in their way.

“I think apps from Rick’s and steaks on the grill sounds like a great plan,” I said to my wives as we waited for the Gnomes to finish.

“And beer,” the red-skinned woman added with a sharp toothed grin.

“Fucking right, and beer.” I nodded.

Once the gnomes were finished, the ladies and I escorted them back to the Encampment of the Dolrath.

“Thank you again,” Wallick said to the three of us as we stopped just outside of the tent city. “Here is your payment, as agreed upon.”

The short man waved his hands to one of the harvesters, who took off the basket from his back and handed it to me.

The bushel basket was filled to the brim with shiny crystals that still had a strange inner glow to them. I took it and nodded in thanks to the Gnomes before I passed the basket off to Amrila, and she slung the basket on her slender shoulders since there was no way I would have been able to get it over even one of my arms.

“Thanks, Wallick.” I held out my hand to the smaller man and leaned forward so he could reach it easily. “I’m sure these will go to good use.”

Wallick shook my hand, and then the Gnome harvesters headed to their homes just outside of the main body of the Encampment to start processing their goods.

The ladies and I headed to the Meeting House to see Chief Ekneme and let her know our mission had been a success. When we entered the large, wooden structure that was the only truly permanent structure in the Dolrath city, the three of us found Ekneme with only a few of her warriors scattered around the long tables. The chief smiled when she saw us enter and embraced Nileme warmly.

“I take it all went well?” the dark-haired, older woman asked.

“There was a Pit Wyrm,” I replied as I sat on the edge of one of the long tables. “But we made pretty short work of it.”

“I’m sure the three of you did.” Ekneme smiled at the ladies and me. “But I’m glad you came here before you left. I received a message from Chief Murdrak, and there’s going to be a war council. I have summoned the leaders of the Dolrath and the Grimthorn Elders. I understand the Crardu leaders and Captain Xuag will also be present.”

I secretly wondered if that meant Bolra, Xuag’s very pretty sister, would be there, too.

“Aren’t you the leader of the Dolrath?” Amrila asked in a curious tone.

“Mother is the chief, but there are many nomadic groups that form the tribe,” Nileme explained. “We are traditionally a nomadic people, that’s why we choose to live in tents, so we can pull up our stakes at any time and go where we need to. Only this Meeting House is permanent, by tradition.”

I remembered Bhathok had once told me about the nomadic Dolrath, when I’d first met him, but that felt like such a long time ago, even though it had only been a couple of months.

“I would like for you three to be present as well,” Ekneme continued in a brisk tone. “You have already done so much for us, Eddie. But as my son-in-law and a Shield Brother to the tribe, I think you should be there.”

“Of course.” I nodded as I forced my thoughts away from the smoking hot, Orcish mystic. “I want to see Ursenegr’s reign come to an end as much as anyone.”

“Wonderful.” The chief inclined her head to me and then turned to Amrila. “I understand that you have contacts in the resistance in the Yennih territory.”

The horned woman looked slightly startled when the powerful woman addressed her directly but she quickly cleared her throat.

“Yes, Chief,” she replied a little stiffly.

“Would you be willing to ask some of your more trusted contacts to come?” the dignified chief asked. “Like Scourge and maybe a few others? I feel they could provide valuable insight and resources to the meeting.”

“Of course.” Amrila nodded. “Whatever helps the cause.”

“Thank you, Shield Sister.” Ekneme smiled and then the tall woman turned back to me. “The message also noted that Murdrak’s alchemists have made a potion from the Basilisk’s gland that should cure our friends in the swamp. When the time comes, I would like for you and Nileme to lead a force into the Twilight to revive them.”

“That’s awesome!” I grinned. “Yeah, absolutely.”

“Very well.” The serious, older woman nodded. “Then I will see all of you again in two days’ time.”

“Good bye, Mother,” Nileme said in a warm tone as she embraced the older Elven woman.

“Take care, Daughter,” Ekneme replied, and her expression was a mix of pride and a little sadness to see the princess go. “And fare well, Shield Brother and Sister.”

“See you soon, Chief,” I said as I also hugged my new mother-in-law.

Then the three of us left the Encampment and headed to the surface with the crystal shards. The path was so familiar now that it all seemed to go by in the blink of an eye.

“Should we drop off the crystals?” the princess asked as we passed near the tunnels that led to the corridor where the Lost Dwarves lived.

“I’ll take care of that tomorrow,” I replied. “I promised Dave I’d help him move out today, and I want to grab a shower so I’m not covered in Pit Wyrm blood as I help him move his sectional out.”

When we came out of the tunnels, through the lilac bushes, Growler and Dread both came running up to me to welcome me back.

The two snow white, dog-like animals with their reddish ears already seemed bigger than they were when I brought them home a few days ago. Ibseth had spoiled them already, and they’d started to fill out. The adolescent garms almost came up to my knees, and if I had to guess from their huge paws, they’d get quite a bit bigger before they were fully grown.

I scratched them behind their ears, and the three of us went into the house to clean up. Ibseth was by the sink as she washed dishes, and she smiled at the three of us as we came through the back door.

“Good afternoon, my adventurers!” the curvy Elven woman said. “How was your mission?”

“Successful,” Amrila grunted as she heaved the basket of shards off her shoulder. “Saggor and the boys should love this.”

“And everyone came through safe,” I added, because I knew Ibseth would care more about everyone’s safety. “We protected the Gnome harvesters from a Pit Wyrm, and no one got hurt.”

“My brave warrior,” Ibseth purred, and she stepped over to me, threw her arms around my neck, and pulled me in for a welcome home kiss.

The petite, white-haired elf had somehow gotten even hotter since she’d become pregnant. The cozy, oversized sweater she wore over soft leggings did nothing to conceal her large, perfect breasts, and the wide neck of the sweater hung in a flirtatious way off one of her smooth shoulders.

I kissed my first wife deeply and pulled her in close. Ibseth wasn’t far along and wouldn’t show for another month or two, but the idea that she was carrying my child endeared the blue-skinned woman to me all the more.

“I gotta grab a quick shower and go help Dave,” I sighed as I finally released Ibseth. “But we’ll pick this back up later.”

“Alright.” The violet-eyed woman playfully wrinkled her nose at me, and I headed into the bathroom.

As I turned on the hot water to let the shower warm up, I turned my thoughts to all the things I wanted to check off my mental to-do list next. My imaginary check-list seemed to grow all the time, and for everything I checked off, another two ideas would take its place.

But it felt good to be busy, and to have the means to do each project without worrying about money.

Once I was all cleaned up, I stepped out of the bathroom and found Amrila standing in the hall to stake her claim on the next shower. The red-skinned woman had taken off her armor and stood in just a t-shirt and tiny black panties.

“Oh, excuse me.” The horned woman feigned surprise and gave me a wicked grin as she squeezed past me and blatantly pushed her tight ass against my crotch as she went into the bathroom.

“Brat!” I snorted as I enjoyed the brush of the red-skinned woman’s round butt across the front of my jeans. “You know I gotta go help Dave.”

“I know,” the Zencarri woman replied as she eyed me up and down. “But you’ll have something pleasant to think about as you move all that heavy furniture.”

Then Amrila took hold of the bottom of her shirt and smoothly pulled it over her head to reveal her pert breasts and tawny nipples. I grinned at the horned woman and reluctantly closed the bathroom door to go keep my promise to my friend and neighbor, but my jeans felt tighter than they had when I put them on.

I put on my beat up work boots and headed out the front door, and then I walked next door where Dave had a large moving van backed up to the house to make the loading process easier. Jessi carried a big box marked “kitchen/fragile” and set it on the lawn with a few other boxes.

“Hey, Eddie.” The plump Midwestern woman smiled and waved when she saw me.

“Hey, Jessi.” I smiled back. “It’s crazy that moving day is already here. How’s the packing coming?”

“Everything is in boxes,” the sweet-faced woman replied. “I’m just bringing them out so we can load them right in after you guys get the heavy stuff on the truck.”

“That’s a solid plan.” I nodded. “Where’s Dave?”

“He’s in the living room,” Jessi said as she stretched her back. “Just go on in, it’s your place now anyway.”

“Thanks,” I chuckled and then went through the open front door.

The inside of the house was cool, like the fall air outside. I guessed Dave had turned off the heat since we would be in and out of the house and the doors would be open.

I found Dave Miller in the large living room that was bare except for a large, sectional couch and the entertainment center that was partly taken apart.

“Eddie.” The sandy haired man grinned when I came in. “Thanks so much for lending a hand. I would have hired movers, but they’re so expensive, and then half your stuff gets broken.”

“It’s no problem.” I shrugged. “If you want to take that end of the couch, I’ll take the other.”

“I bet you can’t wait to move in here,” Dave grunted as he lifted his side of the heavy couch. “Four people in that little trailer must feel like a lot.”

“We make it work,” I laughed as I lifted my side with relative ease.

“I bet you do.” The sandy-haired man winked at me. “You’re a lucky man.”

“I like to think so,” I snorted as I backed my way toward the front door.

Between the two of us, Dave and I got his heavier furniture loaded without much trouble. My wives even came over and helped once Amrila and Nileme had gotten cleaned up. Ibseth couldn’t do any heavy lifting, but she watched the Miller’s two younger kids to lend a hand, and Hank and Jenny played with the petite Elven woman and our two garms. Growler and Dread seemed to love kids and took care not to bowl them over or play too rough as the kids wrestled with them.

“What kind of dogs are those?” Dave asked after we had finished up and cracked a couple of beers.

“Oh…” I stalled as I looked over at the garms. “They’re… one of those fancy new breads, like a labradoodle. They’re part wolfhound, part white lab, and part Chesapeake retriever, I think.”

“Huh,” the sandy-haired man grunted as he watched the kids play with the canines. “They’re beautiful dogs. You got any big plans for your new house? I heard you’re keeping the trailer and that you bought Whitmire’s place.”

“I got a few.” I nodded as I sipped my beer. “I’m thinking about combining the yards. I love a big backyard. And I’m going to put a proper porch on the back of the trailer before the weather gets cold. Ibseth will be able to have a big-ass garden next year, and there’ll be plenty of room for the dogs to run around.”

“And for your growing family,” Dave replied with a sly smile. “Congratulations, by the way. Jessi told me the good news.”

“Thanks, Dave.” I grinned and sheepishly rubbed the back of my neck. “I actually can’t wait to be a dad.”

“It’s the best, but it’s exhausting, too.” Dave nodded. “But then, you have a lot of hands on deck to help. I don’t know how you do it. My hands are full with just Jessi and the kids.”

“Honestly, they make it easy.” I shrugged. “All the ladies do their own part, and they love me and each other. It’s like a dream come true.”

“I’ll say it is,” Dave chuckled as he took a pull from his beer. “Lucky dog.”

Then the Miller loaded their kids into their minivan, and Dave got behind the wheel of the moving truck as we said our last goodbyes as neighbors.

“I’ll miss you girls sooo much,” Jessi said through the open driver’s side window of her light blue van. “All of my new neighbors are going to be boring compared to you three.”

“Then you will have to come visit often,” Ibseth said in a sweet voice.

“I will.” The plump woman grinned back.

“Here’s the keys,” Dave said as he handed me a keyring with four keys on it. “These two are the front door, and the other two are for the door in the garage. Oh! And here’s the fob for the automatic garage door. I think that’s everything.”

“Thank you, have a good drive, Dave,” I said as I looked at my new keys. “I’ll miss you. You and Jack Tinor are the only guys I could have a beer with on the block.”

“Yeah,” the sandy-haired man sighed. “I’m going to miss you, too. But honestly, I’m not going to miss living next to Brock.”

“I’m not too worried about him.” I grinned as I thought about my secret plan to buy up every house in the cul-de-sac. “He’ll come around.”

“Sure…” Dave gave me a skeptical grin before he and Jessi said their final goodbyes, pulled out, and drove away from the cul-de-sac.

As the moving van pulled out of the driveway, I saw Brock was out on his porch with his arms folded and a scowl on his wide face. I just waved and acted like I didn’t notice his attempt to intimidate me, and then I turned my back on him as I looked at the beautiful house that I’d outbid Stanton for. I put an arm around Ibseth and the other around Amrila, and Nileme came up behind me and warped her muscular arms around my waist in a strangely delicate gesture of affection.

We all looked at the new house for a moment, one big family with me at the center to hold it all together. And then my phone rang.

I looked at the display and saw it was my CPA/lawyer, Travis Meyer.

“Hey, Meyer,” I answered the phone.

“Mr. Hill,” I heard the buttoned up man’s cool, professional voice on the other end of the line. “I just wanted to call and let you know that the proceeds from your last transaction with Mr. McElfresh have come through and are now available to you.”

“That’s great!” I grinned.

“There is now two point five million in your account,” Travis confirmed. “Oh, and Mrs. Whitmire’s home is now in escrow.”