Monster Girl Islands 11 Chapter 2

The giant crab monster continued to eye us as drool spittled out of his mouth, and I just knew he was imagining how good we must taste. Still, the bastard had no idea what he’d just gotten himself into. Right now, he was surrounded by not only some of the most elite warriors in the world, but also four deadly dragons that probably thought he looked equally as delicious.

I’ll handle it, Ben, Swaer declared as he swooped down and began to suck in his breath. I hope you like wherever it is you’re from, because I’m gonna send you right back down there!

The slender red dragon unleashed a gust of wind from his mouth that was so strong, we all had to try and tether in place. Nadir and Lezan gripped into the mast with their claws, and the other Dragonkin stabbed their spears into the ground and held on for dear life while the Cero women clung to their gravity-defying Mieraks. Much to my surprise, our enemy didn’t even budge.

The crab’s legs must have been dug in deep, because he simply stood there as Swaer’s breath blew the spit off the crustacean’s mouth and dried his shell like the world’s worst hair dryer.

That’s when I heard the sound of creaking wood.

“Cut the wind, Swaer!” I commanded the dragon. “You’re gonna break off our masts if you keep going like that, and then we’re fucked.”

Swaer halted his breath with a frown, and the crab creature let out a frustrated roar. It began to scuttle toward the wind dragon and took a snap at him with its claws, but Swaer was quick on his feet.

Or, more accurately, he was quick in the air.

The little red dragon slithered away from the battlefield, and the crab snapped at nothing.

Let me try, Tirian declared. He’s not gonna hold his place for this one.

Tirian’s mouth began to glow orange and red, and the dragon hauled back his head as he winded up the attack. The silver beast threw his noggin forward and unloaded a blast of white-hot flames down onto the back of the crab’s body.

This time, the dragon attack definitely had an effect.

The crab creature let out a gurgled shriek as its shell was torched. Then it scuttled away to the right without turning its body whatsoever and disappeared over the edge of the boat. We heard a splash down below as the creature doused its own scalding-hot shell, and we all knew we’d only have a few seconds before it returned for a second attack.

“Does anybody know anything about this creature?” I demanded from my crew. “Any weaknesses? Attack patterns we should look out for?”

“Don’t look at us!” Rikuri huffed. “We’ve ever been off our own island.”

“I’ve never seen anything like this before,” Mira noted. “Though the fire seemed to do the trick.”

“It’s a band-aid,” I noted. “It’ll get him off the ship, but he’s gonna just keep coming up every time he recovers.”

“We need to discover any weak points and then pump it full of arrows,” Ashanti declared from the back of her Mierak. “Those eyes don’t look very protected, if you ask me.”

“I say we just smash the thing.” Nadir grinned. “It’s got a hard shell, but I doubt it’ll be hard enough to withstand a few whacks from our axes!”

“Not a bad idea,” I admitted. “But I want to go in a different direction. Zamwae? How strong is that dragon of yours?”

“The strongest of the strong,” the shaman declared as she climbed up onto her land dragon’s back. “You saw how many orcs he killed just on his own.”

“Then we’ll leave the charge up to you,” I commanded. “Huwar goes in for some close quarters stuff, while everybody else backs him up from afar.”

“Who is ‘everybody else?’” Nima questioned. “Ashanti and I are the only ones with a bow and arrow.”

“We’ll figure it out as we go,” I noted as I twisted the wheel to the left. “That’s the Draco Rex specialty.”

Like clockwork, the crab creature returned from the depths, but this time he appeared over the stern of The Dragon Queen and instantly snapped at the closest thing he could find.

That “thing” happened to be Zikiu.

The brunette Cero woman yelped as she ducked down just in the nick of time. A meaty claw snapped shut right above where her head had been, but Zikiu wasted no time being afraid. The rhino-woman drew her sword-spear weapon, twirled it around, and then plunged it into the crab’s claw as she stood up.

At least, that’s what she was attempting to do.

Instead of piercing the creature’s shell like she had hoped, Zikiu’s weapon simply left a small nick as it bounced off harmlessly, and she only had seconds to roll out of the way before one of the crab’s spiked legs slammed down onto the deck with enough force to break through the wood.

“Fucker of mothers!” Mira declared. “It’s strong enough to destroy our ship with only its claws.”

“Not if Huwar has any say in the matter!” Zamwae called out.

The long-haired Cero woman barked out something in her native tongue and pointed at the crab creature with her staff. Huwar responded with a loud snarl before he bent his front down like an overexcited dog and then hurled his body at the crab.

My heart raced a million beats per second as Huwar snapped his jaws onto the crab’s wrist and proceeded to shake his head back and forth furiously.

The crab responded with a pained cry before it lashed out at Huwar’s long neck with its claw, but before the blow could land, a blast of fire rained down from above and knocked the claw into the ship’s deck.

Not on my watch, pal, Tirian growled telepathically.

As Huwar continued to rip and tear at the crab’s arm, I noticed Lezan and Nadir were climbing up a nearby mast… Oh, no.

What were these two planning to do?

The crab brought its claw back up toward Huwar, and this time the land dragon had to release the creature from his grasp. Huwar hauled back his thick neck and then batted away the deadly claw with his head, and my mouth fell open as I watched Huwar proceed to use his neck like a freaking club against his opponent. He slammed his skull into the crab about a dozen times, and each new attack struck a different part of its body. Huwar slugged the creature’s head and arms repeatedly as he parried blows and attacked on his own, until he finally went for the spiny legs that held the bastard upright.

Huwar’s head slammed into one of the crab’s spiny appendages, and there was a loud, eggshell-esque crack as the crab screamed bloody murder.

The deadly monster pulled back both of his claws in unison before he brought them forward right at Huwar’s throat.

Luckily for the land dragon, the two Coonag women had his back.

“Ayeayeayeayeaye!” Nadir yelled as she and Lezan leapt off the masts and took aim at the crab.

Both of the racoon women propelled themselves in different directions so they could take aim at different parts of their opponent, and their faces were full of mischievous glee as they slammed their battle axes into the crab’s claws, knocked them downward, and then somersaulted away from the beast when they hit the deck.

With the crab temporarily exposed, Huwar and Zamwae went in for the kill.

Huwar opened his mouth wide and then slammed his teeth into the crab as hard as he could. There was a loud crunching noise as the beast’s shell was breached again, but it still remained standing.

In fact, Huwar had made a deadly mistake. He got too aggressive, and that made him let his guard down.

In one swift motion, the crab hoisted all six of its legs into the air until it was suspended by the grasp of Huwar’s mouth, and then it rammed all of its appendages right into the land dragon’s chest.

Huwar roared in pain as he was tossed backward and released his hold on the crab. When the land dragon’s body impacted the deck, our ship was pushed downward, and the waves of the ocean crashed over the side.

I held my ground as the waves swept over my body and threatened to send me overboard, but not everyone was so lucky.

“Ben!” Batari screamed as she and her Mierak were washed over the side of the ship.

“Queen Mother!” Baratu gasped in horror as her leader plummeted into the ocean.

Fuck. I couldn’t just abandon the wheel and give us up to the mercy of the sea. At the same time, I wasn’t going to let any of my crewmates drown, especially the future mother of my child.

“Mira, wheel!” I commanded, and then I let go.

“Are you fucking crazy?” Mira barked as I dashed past her and toward the edge of the ship.

I didn’t even look back to see if Mira had secured the wheel before I leapt over the edge. There was only one thing on my mind at the current moment, and that was saving Batari from a watery grave.

The deep blue sea approached fast as I plummeted toward its icy waters, and I clasped my hands up above my head like an Olympic diver seconds before I breached the surface and fell below the waves. I curved my body and then used my own momentum to bring myself back up to the surface, where I instantly began my search for the Cero woman.

“Ben!” Batari’s voice called out through a mouthful of water. “Ben!”

Off to my left I saw a head of wet, matted white hair as Batari flailed around in a panic. Her ant was beside her in the water, and the poor thing looked like it was just as scared.

The sounds of the battle continued to rage on the deck above as I kicked my feet and swam toward the drowning Queen Mother. I wrapped my left arm around her neck, held her tight, and then tried to calm her down.

“It’s alright,” I reassured Batari. “It’s okay… I’ve got you. Calm down, and listen to me closely. I can carry you easily, but if I try to carry both you and your Mierak, I won’t have any hands left to paddle. Do you think you could hold onto your ant for me?”

Batari spat out a bit of salty water and took one last deep, fearful breath before she nodded. The Cero woman then held out her spear-sword toward the ant, who snapped his pinchers around it in an instant.

Then I began the long swim back to the ship, made even longer by the fact that I was now lugging a full-sized human and a giant insect behind me.

I really shouldn’t have complained, though, because things were about to get much fucking worse.

There was a flash of fire from above, and then the body of the crab creature came careening over the side of The Dragon Queen.

Shit. Shit… Double shit.

I tried to intensify the strokes of my swim, but there was only so much I could do.

Suddenly, the body of the crab crashed into the water behind us.

The waves created by the impact scooped us up in their deadly grasp, and the next thing I knew Batari and I were being lifted up off the surface. All I could do was close my eyes and hope we weren’t crushed against the side of the ship.

The three of us splashed down into the ocean, and I took in a full breath of salt water. I gasped and gulped for air as I kicked to the surface, but that just made things worse. More water was pulled into my throat as I panicked for breath. If I didn’t break through soon, I was going to drown.

After what felt like a freaking eternity, my head burst through the surface of the water, and I coughed up about a gallon of salty liquid as I tried to catch my breath.

As soon as I caught it, however, I realized we weren’t out of danger yet. Nowhere even close.

Because now, the giant, hungry crab was in the water with us, and I was sure it could probably swim way faster than I possibly could.

Still, I had to try.

I grabbed Batari, and Batari grabbed her Mierak, and then I proceeded toward the ship. The wave had brought us closer to the vessel, but I still couldn’t shake the feeling that the crab was closing in on us by the second.

“Captain overboard!” Darya called out from above, and then she dropped a rope down this side of the ship. “Grab on, Ben, and we’ll hoist you up.”

“M-My Mierak!” Batari gasped as she tried not to swallow water.

“I’ve got him, too,” I promised the Cero woman.

“He can climb walls, Ben,” the Queen Mother reminded me. “F-Faster than rope.”

She was right. If we could get to the edge of the ship, Batari’s Mierak could take us up the rest of the way and get us far away from the deadly pinchers of our enemy.

Still, we had to get there first.

“Swim, Ben!” Nima’s voice screamed. “Come on!”

Well, fuck. The terror in the Niralope’s voice definitely wasn’t a good sign.

The crab was gaining on us.

Thankfully, I had a guardian angel up above. Actually, it was a three-hundred pound water dragon, but it may as well have been the same thing.

Hold on, dear one! George called out, and then I saw a streak of blue as he leapt off the ship.

George plummeted for a second or two before he splashed into the water, only ten feet or so behind our position. The waves launched us forward once again, but this time I was ready.

I took a deep breath as I went under, popped back out, and continued to push forward with my two passengers.

Still… A chill ran down my spine when I realized just how close we’d come to being crab bait.

Splashes intermixed with the sound of a grunting water dragon and a snarling crab monster as they fought behind me, and the water became more and more turbulent by the second. I finally reached the side of The Dragon Queen, grabbed onto the rope, and then let Batari’s Mierak do the rest.

Once the oversized insect was within reach of the boat, it placed its front legs onto the wood, clung to it like seran wrap, and then hoisted itself out of the water. Batari and I both wrapped our legs around the ant as tightly as we could before it took off up the side of the vessel like a bat out of hell.

It overpowered me, dear one! George warned me telepathically. It’s headed your way!

Right on cue, something massive rose out of the water behind us and began to scuttle up the side of The Dragon Queen.

Tirian’s silver body flew over behind us as his mouth lit up with his fiery breath, and he prepared to roast the crab again.

“Don’t!” I commanded the dragon. “If you miss that thing, you could set the whole ship ablaze.”

I don’t miss, Tirian scoffed. Jemma taught me that.

He may have had a great teacher, but it still wasn’t worth the risk. Then again, if Tirian did nothing… We might not be around to say “I told you so.”

Just then, Ashanti and Nima appeared over the side of the deck with their bows at the ready. They fired in unison, and two seaglass-tipped arrows zipped past my head and clanked off the armor of the crab behind me. Nima and Ashanti fired two more arrows, but they seemed to be equally as useless against our opponent.

“Tirian?” I asked the fire dragon. “Not to be pushy, buddy… But what’s taking so long?”

I can’t get a clear shot, Tirian huffed. Now that you mentioned the whole ‘don’t burn the ship down’ thing, I think I’m getting inside my own head.

“Now is not the time to have a crisis of faith in yourself, Tirian,” I grunted.

“Yipppeeee!” Lezan cackled as she and Nadir hurdled over the edge of the vessel.

The two Coonag women plummeted downward with their axes behind their heads, and they seemed fully intent on cracking this crab like a rotten egg.

“Hi, Ben!” Nadir giggled as they fell past our position.

I finally got the courage to turn my head around and look back at our pursuiter, and I was instantly glad I did. The crab monster was only about twenty feet away from us at this point, but he stopped instantly when Nadir and Lezan slammed their stone battle axes into its body.

Bits of the monster’s shell flew off in clusters of broken dust, but the attack didn’t seem to do much damage.

Thankfully, that wasn’t going to stop Nadir and Lezan.

Lezan struck the crab in the face again with her axe, while Nadir took aim at one of the joints on his arm.

When Nadir’s weapon hit, there was a loud crack, and the creature wailed in agony.

That was it. The joints.

The Mierak carried us over the side of the ship and back to safety, and I instantly sprang off its back and drew my seaglass sword.

“Thank the gods you’re both alive!” Nima practically sobbed.

“And thank the gods we didn’t capsize,” Mira teased from her position at the wheel. “Luckily, we had a second mate who knows what she’s doing, and who’s literally bonded to our captain via telepathic link. Otherwise, she might have just thought he was abandoning ship and leaving us all for dead.”

“Speaking of feeling dead,” Darya grumbled with a twirl of her spear. “Zarya and I feel completely useless right now.”

“Tell me about it,” Rikuri agreed.

“That’s about to change,” I reassured the team. “Because our lovely Coonag friends just discovered this thing’s weakness. The joints.”

“The joints?” Nima questioned.

“Of course!” Candara smacked her forehead. “The creature is pretty flexible, but has a hard shell around its body. That means it has to have joints to move freely, which means--”

“Which means the armor isn’t as strong there,” Rikuri finished with a smile, and then she flipped her spear-sword around in her hands. “This just made the battle a lot more interesting.”

“When that thing gets back up here, swarm it,” I commanded. “Every single one of us needs to go for its joints, and don’t let up until it’s on the freaking ground.”

“Ahhhhh!” Lezan cried out as her body hurled up into the air.

Tirian swooped up and caught her before she fell back down, though the Coonag woman wasn’t fazed whatsoever. Lezan’s tail was fluffed out like a pissed off cat as she dangled from Tirian’s talons, and she swung her limbs wildly and stared down at her opponent.

“What’d you catch me for?” She blew a lock of her multi-colored hair out of her eyes. “I had him right where I wanted him.”

You were about to fall right down into his mouth! Tirian declared, even though he knew Lezan couldn’t understand him.

Nadir’s body was tossed up next, but the Coonag leader was much more enthusiastic about her counter attack. As she passed by Tirian, the racoon woman threw out her hand, grabbed onto his right wing, and then used her momentum to swing onto the dragon’s back.

“Onward, noble dragon!” Nadir cackled and pointed her axe down at the beast below.

I think I have a clear shot now. Tirian completely ignored the woman’s comment. Shall I--

“No!” I ordered the silver dragon. “I’ve got a plan, and that plan requires the monster to come up here.”

Sure, Tirian’s fire breath would probably repel the crab monster’s charge, but it wouldn’t end anything. The crab would just do like it had done the last two times… It’d jump back into the water, cool off, and then make another assault.

We needed to end this on our terms, where we had somewhat of a tactical advantage.

The disgusting scuttling sound continued as the crab monster pulled itself over the deck of The Dragon Queen. Bits of saliva sprayed across the deck as it roared at us, and then the damn thing charged us with full-on rage in its dark eyes.

This wasn’t about getting a bite to eat anymore. We’d shown the crab monster we weren’t going to be an easy meal, and this apex predator of the ocean didn’t like that one bit.

It was too bad he’d decided to attack an even stronger apex predator.

The Draco Rex.

“Let’s crack this crab!” I commanded, and then my crewmates and I charged the beast.

Ashanti, Anora, and Nima provided cover with their arrows while Baratu, Batari, Rikuri, Zikiu, and Zamwae led a mounted assault. Candara flew by their side with her fan blade at the ready, while the Dragonkin twins and I were the final line of attack.

As for Jonas? Well… He was mostly just here for emotional support, and he was currently standing behind Mira at the helm.

One of Anora’s arrows struck a joint on the crab’s left leg, and the beast let out a shrill, gurgled gasp as the leg gave out from under him. He continued forward, but I breathed a sigh of relief knowing this plan could actually work.

Now, all we had to do was avoid those deadly pinchers of his.

Huwar and Zamwae were the first to arrive, and they hit the crab with everything they had. The land dragon smashed his head into the side of the red bastard as hard as he could, and the crab fell down onto one set of knees.

The rest of the Cero women were next up, and they showed no mercy.

As the crab attempted to stand, they rode past him on each side and slashed out at him with their sword-spears. Their blows landed against the creature’s leg joints, and he snarled as he fell back down onto the deck.

“What exactly is the plan here, Draco Rex?” Darya shouted as we ran. “We can attack his joints all day if we wish, but until we crack through that shell, he’s not going down for good.”

The crab monster swung its arms at the mounted rhino-women, but their trusty steeds were way too fast. Instead, they all continued to harass the beast as it feebly tried to take them out.

It was so distracted by the Cero women, in fact, that it didn’t even see Candara approaching.

I watched with pure glee as the butterfly woman flew over to the crab, held her fan blade horizontal to the ground, and then plunged its front spine straight into the monster’s eye.

Blood splurted from the crab’s eye hole when it was stabbed, and then again when Candara pulled her weapon away.

The crab beast roared with pain and anger as he continued to lash out at his attackers, but it was no use.

That’s when the twins and I arrived on the scene.

Darya and Zarya tended to fight as a singular unit, so they split off to the right. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Zarya do a cartwheel, land underneath the monster’s right leg, and then plunge her spear into its lowest joint.

I slashed my sword across one of the crab’s arms as I passed and reveled in its bellow of pain. The monster’s spiny claw tried to snatch me up off the ground, but Huwar was on the case.

The land dragon bit into the crab’s wrist, caught it in place, and then snarled as he bit even harder. There was a sickening crunch as the crab’s right claw popped free from its joint, and sticky red blood sprayed across the deck like a firehose.

The beast screamed in agony as it became more panicked. It began to attack with every single appendage on its body, and I quickly found myself weaving back and forth as its deadly legs stabbed into the deck around me.

It made a sweeping swing with what remained of its arm, and this time its blow landed. The crab’s arm swept the Mieraks out from underneath the Cero women, and they all went tumbling onto the deck as their ants rolled in the opposite direction.

The beast continued to stomp its feet as Darya, Zarya, and I moved around it in a circle, and we looked for any break in its pattern so we could attack. Our archers didn’t let up their assault, either, nor did the land dragon.

This bastard must have realized his days were numbered, because he suddenly scuttled off to the side and toward the edge of the ship.

“Oh, no you don’t…” I growled. “Swaer! We could use an updraft right about now.”

On it! the little red wind dragon said before he swooped down just above the surface of the water.

I ran over to the side of the deck as the crab threw itself overboard in a cowardly effort to escape.

Too bad Swaer was already waiting for him.

The wind dragon sucked in a big breath and then unleashed a massive gust of wind straight up into the air. Swaer’s wind caught the falling crab, pushed back against its gravitational pull, and held it suspended in the air.

The crab’s arms and legs flailed around as it was caught in the wind dragon’s miniature funnel cloud, but there was nothing it could do.

“Who wants to play the role of nutcracker?” I asked aloud, even though I already knew the answer.

“Mememememememe!” Nadir couldn’t hold in her excitement. “Let me do it, Ben!”

“Tirian?” I raised an eyebrow to the dragon, and the silver guy read my mind.

I watched as Tirian flew out above the flailing crab, with Nadir still on his back and Lezan still in his hands, and then I turned to Darya and held out my hand.

“Uhhh…” the brown-scaled warrior sputtered. “What are you suggesting, Draco Rex?”

“I just need to borrow your spear,” I finally asked. “I’ll have a new one made when we get back home.”

“That won’t be necessary,” Darya chuckled. “These things are as expendable to me as the wargs are to the orcs.”

The beautiful Dragonkin woman handed me her weapon, and I weighed it in my hand as I watched the scene before me unfold.

Tirian released his grip on Lezan at the same time that Nadir hopped off his back, and both of the Coonag women cackled happily as they landed atop the crab’s back and got to work. Lezan and Nadir slammed their stone axes into the monster’s back repeatedly, and it roared in agony as they began to break through the already-cracked spots on his shell.

As soon as they saw an opening, however, the racoon women went downright feral.

Nadir used her axe as a fulcrum as she shoved its flat edge underneath the creature’s shell, leaned her weight on the handle, and broke away a massive chunk of its protective armor.

Lezan, on the other hand, sunk her teeth into the hole in the crab’s shell. She made a chittering noise as she tore off a bit of shell with her mouth, and then she repeated the action again.

“Remind me to never get on these twos’ bad side.” Ashanti shuddered as we all watched the scene unfold.

“What happens now?” the sunflower-kissed Dragonkin, Anora, asked.

“Watch and see.” I smiled at the healer, and then I jumped up onto the side of the ship.

I took a deep breath as I looked down on the monster’s back and tried to remember where exactly his eyes had been. None of us really knew what the anatomy of this giant crab monster was, but surely he had a brain of some sort between those slitted, dead eyes of his.

I guess if I didn’t find it the first time, I’d just have to keep trying.

With my target spot locked on, I took a small leap and allowed gravity to take its course.

I pulled the spear back above my head as I plunged toward our opponent and waited for the opportune moment to strike. Once I got about five feet above the bastard, I let out a yell of frustration and brought the spear forward.

The seaglass tip of the weapon plunged right into the crab’s exposed flesh with a wet schluck, and the beast went rigid. The whole spear snapped at the middle when my body impacted against the beast, but the damage was already done. The crab monster gurgled as the life drained from his body, and then he finally went limp.

I simply smiled at the two Coonag women, looked up to my crew, and held the broken spear above my head in victory.

“Ayeayeayeayeaye!” Lezan and Nadir declared as they held their axes high.

Meanwhile, the rest of the crew went wild.

“Tembori’s tusks…” Batari gasped. “You did it!”

“Of course he did,” Jonas scoffed. “We all should know better than to doubt the Draco Rex.”

Uhhhhh, I don’t want to ruin the celebration here, Swaer’s pipsqueak of a voice spoke up. But this thing is really, really heavy.

“You did well, Swaer,” Batari reassured her bondmate. “I think you can drop it now.”

“Actually, wait…” I held up my hand to stop the dragon. “On second thought… Toss me down a rope. Two of them, actually.”

There was a confused silence from above, but my crewmates obliged without so much as a single question.

Once I had the ropes in my hands, I proceeded to tie their ends around the dead crab’s arms, and the second I was done, I peered down at Swaer.

So…. Am I done? the little dragon practically begged.

I motioned to Nadir and Lezan to hop on the ropes, and the three of us proceeded to grab onto our lifelines.

“Okay,” I chuckled to Swaer. “You’re good to go. Let him go.”

The wind dragon released his breath, and the lifeless crab’s body crashed against the side of the ship.

“Don’t just stand there, guys,” Mira’s voice commanded from her position at the wheel. “Pull it up!”

My crewmates all flocked to the ropes, grabbed them firmly, and then hoisted us and the dead crab back up onto the deck. Swaer and George both returned to the ship’s deck as we arrived, and everyone seemed perplexed as to what was going on.

“I can explain,” I chuckled through winded breaths. “The creatures that look like this back in my world are a delicacy. I figured this guy right here might taste a lot better than he looks, too. If Baratu and Hali are up to the challenge of cooking it, that is.”

“You know me, Draco Rex.” Baratu clapped her hands together and grinned. “I will try to cook anything.”

“Tell me about it,” Rikuri gagged. “I just hope Ben’s right about this thing, or we’re in for another spotted hound incident.”

“That was just because the meat was spoiled,” the Cero chef harumphed. “It had nothing to do with the way it was prepared.”

“Sure, sure…” Ashanti muttered.

I was just glad my friends and I were all still in once piece, and that we could all laugh about the situation now.

I leaned back against the body of the crab, looked up to the blue sky, and let out a longing sigh.

Hopefully, the rest of the trip would go much more smoothly.

Then again, if it didn’t, I now knew I had a really fucking good team by my side to ensure it got back on track.

Next stop? The Dragonkin island.

And, more importantly, all of the sexy, adoring women who lived there.