Check-in, 0.37 Reflection, and 0.38 Preview

Hi, perverts! It's been a bit. I usually do my best to put out at least two releases a month, but the past few weeks have been super rough for me health-wise. Multiple nights in a week without sleep, inability to get much of anything done, even eating properly. As you might imagine, it's hard to write sexy stuff in such a state. The good news is that I'm on the upswing, so I'm feeling up to resuming work. Thank you all for your patience, and I always understand if you need to adjust your support during a dry spell.

I've heard other creators say things similar to this, but whenever I have a longer dip in how much I'm able to work, I tend to feel guilty, which makes it even harder to be communicative and get back in the routine of creation. I know that's not too helpful, but it's something I have to learn deal with, and I really appreciate your understanding. Everyone has been super cool about dry spells, and it helps.

The most recent poll concluded with a gangbang option for Theresa's graduation. If you don't want to share her, don't worry; there will be other options! Something has to be implemented first, but I fully intend to support a monogam-ish approach to the game for those who are inclined toward such depravity. 😉

Reflecting on Dreams and Desires

I liked adding more stuff to do in the mansion! My original vision for the game was far more mansion-focused, before I did more design and decided it was important to have more varied settings and characters. Still, I definitely like the idea of slowly discovering all these weird-ass devices and rooms in this place you're living.

I hope the dream perversions feel like a good way to expose Theresa to erotic horror. It's tricky getting her to that point for two reasons. First, she's just not an adventurous character in that way: while she does go on one expedition, she's not really in a physical or mental condition to be taking huge risks in the waking world.

Second, I'm super conscious about modelling consent in Ruin Me. I definitely enjoy games that involve CNC and dubcon themes, but that's not what I'm trying to make... additionally, Patreon is both strict and capricious about what it can support. With the player, I do my best to always provide a way to opt out or back out of scenes, but Theresa isn't controlled by you. So placing Theresa's scenes in the dream-Elsewhere, where she can wake up at any time, is hopefully a good way to let things get sexy and weird while maintaining an out.

I gave a more-or-less subtle nod to this in the text, but the "Toccata dal Labirinto di Carne" sequence owes major inspiration to the excellent Mystery Flesh Pit universe created by Trevor Roberts. Check it out if you want only-somewhat-sexy horror set inside a cavernous, eldritch being.

It's nice having Theresa showing more agency in the game. I feel like just the limited way that she requests activities in this update helps to make her feel a little more real and a little less like just a plaything.

I struggle a bit with art, still. I know that the best way to improve my skills is practice, but a bit of the same doubt that makes it hard to recover from stretches of poor health also makes it hard for me to keep up a practice schedule. I'd love to be able to fund outside artists, but that's not currently possible, so I intend to keep making gradual improvements and hopefully get better and better at translating what's in my head to the game.

Next Release

I'd like to add more dream scenes! I have a concept for each level of Depravity and I intend to gradually get them written and released. Additionally, there are play scenes picked by a recent poll that I want to get in: pee play won out, but the top choices also include anal sex and coitus, both of which definitely make their current absence felt in the game. I'd like to get at least one of those options written for next release.

I'd also like to add the option to make body markings permanent, prompted by William's request in the last reflection. If I can manage to get my drawing in order, I'd also like to add piercings.

I'm excited about writing the graduation sequences, but those are complicated enough that I don't know if the first one will end up in this upcoming release. We'll see!

Thank you all again for your support and I hope you keep enjoying what I'm releasing! If you have any suggestions, questions, or issues, please comment here, PM me on Patreon, or write phanes@phanes.me .