Poorly Drawn Month: August 2022

Welcome to back to a new season of Poorly Drawn Month. Exclusively for you guys on Patreon, we do a recap of each month, big stories, key moments, matches, incidents, silly nonsense and more – with words from me, and fantastic artwork from Poorly Drawn Arsenal @cantdrawarsenal.

AUGUST 2022

After a very exciting pre-season helps banish some of the ghosts of last season, on the eve of the new campaign the long-awaited All Or Nothing documentary is released to open up all those all wounds again.

Nevertheless, there’s much to enjoy in the documentary, not least of which are Mikel Arteta’s pre-game team-talks.

He even impresses with his artistic skills, putting Arsenal-related illustrators on edge lest he launch his own range of merchandise.

There’s even pre-game motivation from the club’s photographer.

Soon though, attention turns to the actual football as the new Premier League season begins.

The Gunners are away at Crystal Palace on the opening day, another Friday night start to the new campaign, and having lost there just a few short months ago, there is some trepidation despite the renewed optimism.

Gabriel Martinelli puts Arsenal ahead in the first half, while new number 1 Aaron Ramsdale is called into action to keep Palace at bay. Late on, Bukayo Saka forces an own goal to give the scoreline some daylight, and the Arsenal fans practice their song for a new summer signing by singing at a former club legend on the sideline in his role as Palace boss.

The game also marks an impressive debut for 21 year old defender William Saliba, who has been out on loan for a couple of seasons. Many doubted that this day would come, but his performance is as cool as it gets.

With the transfer window still open, fans are hoping for more arrivals, but until then there are some departures to take care of. Bernd Leno joins Fulham, while Lucas Torreira eventually finds a new home having run out of clubs in Italy to be linked with, and he signs for Galatasaray.

Rumours that he tried to stow away in the luggage of Pablo Mari as he made his way to AC Monza could not be verified.

Next up the the first home game of the season, against Leicester City. Gabriel Jesus scores his first Arsenal goal in fine style, curling into the top corner as a sea of defenders look on aghast.

The Brazilian adds a second before an unfortunate own goal from William Saliba allows Leicester back into it. However, Arsenal respond quickly, with Granit Xhaka making the most of a goalkeeping error.

Leicester score again, but once more the Gunners respond straight away, this time Gabriel Martinelli extending the lead to make it two wins from two for Mikel Arteta’s side.

Jesus should have a hat-trick, but misses a great chance, so has to be content with just the two goals and two assists on his home debut. Afterwards, he says feels more freedom at Arsenal than at Man City, declaring, “Now I have a different mindset and I believe in myself much more.

“I am no longer that robot that used to be there.”

In the week of the Bournemouth game, a former Arsenal favourite announces his retirement. Nacho Monreal hangs up his boots at the age of 36. He played 251 games for the Gunners, winning three FA Cups along the way.

Arsenal head to the south coast to take on Bournemouth, and two early goals in the first half from skipper Martin Odegaard put us in a comfortable position. It’s a beautiful sunny day, and the Arsenal fans are in fine voice, singing for the team and individuals, before a new song emerges.

It emerges ... and doesn’t stop as the Gooners sing for William Saliba to the tune of Tequila by The Champs. Thousands of people going ‘do do do do do do do …’ for the bit usually played by a saxophone is quite something.

It’s an earworm, but an inspirational one, as early in the second half Saliba sweeps home a majestic first goal for the club.

It’s so good, it leaves Oleskandr Zinchenko in awe of what he’s just seen.

In an interview Martin Odegaard admits he remained more quiet than he normally is because of the presence of the All Or Nothing cameras. The Arsenal captain said, “ I don’t feel any need to talk when the camera is there. I am a little bit more shy when the camera is there, but I think there was a lot more that happened then you see in the documentary.”

Another report says that UEFA are keeping tabs on Arsenal with regards to Financial Fair Play limits.

At the Emirates, Arsenal make it four wins from four, coming from behind to beat Fulham 2-1. The visitors go ahead after a mistake by Gabriel, before Martin Odegaard equalises and the Brazilan makes amends with a late winner.

The players and fans celebrate taking all three points.

Unfortunately, it emerges that the post-game euphoria is too vigorous for some people, and the tedious sirens of the Celebration Police are soon heard.

August finishes with another win, making it five from five in the Premier League. Gabriel Jesus puts Arsenal ahead against Villa, and in truth the Gunners should have scored more.

The visitors pull one back from direct from a corner, unfortunately the ref or VAR don’t spot – or choose not to spot – Aaron Ramsdale being held. However, Villa’s joy is short-lived. Gabriel Martinelli fires home the winner just a couple of minutes later, well and truly wiping the smile off Steven Gerrard’s face.

August closes in fine fashion, with Arsenal sitting top of the league, but the transfer window remains open until September 1st at 11pm.

Join us next time to find out what happens on deadline day. And by find out, we mean see how we manage to transform nothing into words and pictures.