This is getting OUT of CONTROL
Added 2025-05-06 14:21:10 +0000 UTC
Comments
This is such an incredible episode for me! Decades ago, I was diagnosed with learned helplessness (the clinical version, not the way most people use the phrase) because the environment I grew up in was so toxic. I didn't have control of even influence over any aspect of my life; even the clothes I wore were decided for me and punishments for disobedience were immediate and harsh. You'd think that would mean an external locus of control, and on the surface, I do seem to lean that way. The traffic made me late. A tornado took out my Internet connection. I'm very aware of when effects beyond my control dictate events. But I have all the hallmarks of a dysfunctionally extreme *internal* locus of control, and it makes sense if you consider two things: * growing up, how I felt about and reacted to things was the only thing I really had control over * growing up, I was taught to take responsibility for things way beyond my control, like whether my parents fought or whether one of them was in a bad mood Because of the LH diagnosis early in life, I've always focused on trying to take *more responsibility* to offset an overly external locus of control. But that hasn't been helping, because those signs of external locus of control are actually an attempt to correct for feeling responsible for everything that happens to everyone around me. I already had all that information, but hadn't put it together so clearly until you whiteboarded it all so neatly for us! 🖤
Cassandra Simplex
2025-05-07 00:25:54 +0000 UTCLoved the episode! <3 Can't wait to see you get even more chaotic and fun endings that are out there : D
Windo
2025-05-06 18:25:43 +0000 UTC
