I should be sleeping but..

I know I should be sleeping and wake up in 5 hours buuuut here I am not sleeping and having fantasy little thoughts. Like having a daddy to notice lots of fidgeting and a glowing screen and how restless his little girl is. Daddy leaving for what she thinks is bathroom break or for a glass of water and coming back with a diaper and bottle to sleepily change her and give her a bottle. Setting her phone to his side of the bed “besides baby’s don’t need phones anyways especially this late”, replacing the glow of her screen and sound of the video she was watching with the sounds of a fresh diaper and pacifier suckling, slow diaper pats that fade as he falls back asleep…

Or just thinking about how much I still miss being absolutely hooked on pacifiers. I used to get sleepy and calm using one just from a routine of having it every night for bed and still think of those “nigh nighs” sleepily said with a pacifier. When someone loves seeing you with a pacifier it makes you want to use them even more in a way I’ve never fully been able to explain but it’s a comfort on top of a comfort item that feels like the ultimate win

Okay last sleepy thought.. and a very babyish one is I’ve always wondered what it’s like to take a nap or sleep with a baby monitor. The thought of being laid down for bed but hearing Daddy finish a few last things around the house. Feeling tired because it’s the end of the day but unable to sleep because you’re wide awake listening for every little detail and that feeling you’re missing out while being laid down early in the crib.. fidgeting and fussing to be let out and sleep in the adult bed with daddy, even if it means double diapers to not ruin the sheets. Pouting but accepting of the rule and excitedly waddling into bed with daddy after a change.

*bonus points on this one if I was in need of a change already and begging for a diaper change via baby monitor until daddy takes pity on me. Changes me and thennnn waddling into bed with daddy because I’m too little to sleep alone

Okay I should actually go to bed now but thought I’d share some snippets that are probably poorly written but I’ll blame the tired on that. Night night💕