Weekely diary: Chapter 2

It has been over a month since I started uploading drawings on X, and it has been an exciting experience. I never expected it to be so well-received. While I enjoy creating content about princesses in captivity the most, I am gradually becoming interested in other types of content as well. I have had to learn many new things, both about the internet and thanks to all of you. Many of you ask me what I think about it or how it makes me feel... I will try to be as honest as possible.

Honestly, I've kept all of this a secret. My family obviously doesn't know anything since my parents currently live in Valladolid and I am in Madrid. We usually only see each other once a month and on holidays, so there isn't much contact. The only person who knows about it is Helena, and she also has mixed feelings about the topic.

For a woman, it's complicated to open up about these things because she quickly gets labeled with many negative things... as you have probably seen, I receive quite unpleasant comments every week. On the other hand, sharing my intimate thoughts with you excites me and gives me an adrenaline rush, especially when it comes to my own drawings. Seeing you look at them and comment on them excites me, I won't deny it.

I think it's a characteristic of most women. Our self-esteem is based on feeling desired and beautiful, basically. Why else would we spend so much time fixing ourselves, buying clothes, and always trying to be pleasant? We always strive to look beautiful, and that keeps us psychologically stable. Any woman who says she doesn't like being desired is probably lying. I'm not saying it doesn't happen to men, but it happens a lot more to women, and we are completely dependent on it.

As for me, I'm no different from the rest. I love feeling beautiful and desired; it's a sensation that I can't explain. But walking down the street and seeing those furtive glances, the head turns as I pass by... seeing my figure in mirrors, it's a difficult sensation to explain but it brings me great satisfaction.

On one hand, I think it's a bit depressing that my self-esteem revolves around that, but I believe it's something natural that I can't avoid.

I'm going to share something that I don't think I've ever seen anywhere, and it surprises me that it's not talked about. Talking to other girls, I have realized that it happens to them as well, and it happens to me too. They are more excited by the situation itself than by the actual act or the person involved. It has always been said that women are more psychological while men are more visual, and women seek stimulation in other ways. This is 100% correct.

But I go beyond that. Women think more about themselves in a situation than about the other person. They love feeling the desire that their body produces in the other person. They imagine their own body in certain situations, how it makes the other person feel, etc. In other words, we get aroused by thinking about ourselves in relation to the other person. That's why physical appearance is not always the most important thing for women, because many times we think about how the man desires us because of our body, and that is much more important.

Yes, Women do masturbate, maybe not as much as men, but they do. Personally, I do it about once a week, more or less. I'm not a big fan of traditional porn, to be honest. Lately, Helena and I sometimes watch interracial videos on TV when we're feeling tired and a bit naughty... We have no problem sharing our preferences and openly talking about it. And yes, we have even masturbated together while watching something... (we're not lesbians...)

It is difficult to describe the sensation that those black men awaken in us...

To be continued