Reflecting Day: Hiatus Announcement

We’re not much for self-reflection, unless you mean that thing where you go to comb your hair with a switchblade, then see the mirror and realize it’s already perfect. So it’s been a while since our last Reflecting Day, but there have been a bunch of huge Hot Dog developments we just haven’t formally announced. Let’s get formal, motherfuckers.

First up is the new and improved Hot Dog store!

We’ve brought back most of our old designs, plus we have some incredible new ones featuring the 1900HOTDOG site art by Rusty Shackles. Like the Assembled Dogs shirt! Gather your ragtag crew of Hot Dogs, each cannon looser than the last.

Or celebrate the many lovely Hot Dog Days with a shirt of themed wieners, including a sultry overall-clad Diebel Dog. Falling in love is extra.

We’re adding new shirts every time we think of a stupid joke that will get us sued, but also commissioning fine art every month. For September, honor our Manimal, Wizard, or Hulk Hogan Speedboat podcast series with the Crisis on Infinite Berks Shirt by Michael Vincent Bramley!

Like everything on the modern internet, the new store is hacked together and scattered across six middlemen who take a small cut in exchange for ruining it a little bit. But it works! Both the shirts and printing are high quality, the orders are actually arriving, and most crucially: an unsupervised robot isn’t replacing every shirt with a sexual proposition. That’s not a joke, that’s really what happened to our last store. Our old printer handed off customer service to a garbage AI which, regardless of what you ordered, sent you a shirt asking you to 69. Again, not a joke. We tried to contact customer service, but it was run by the same robot and this time it wanted a handjob. That one was a joke, it’s hard to tell the difference these days between a punchline and a business plan.

We’re also doing video podcasts now! Come follow us on YouTube for animated Dogg Zzones featuring these adorable shark-eyed ghouls-

Black eyes. Like a doll’s eyes. Let ‘em haunt you!

For the Bigfeets podcast, we record actual video of Brockway, Seanbaby, and Jason Pargin’s handsome faces.

Thrill as they actually make the mouth shapes of the words you hear! Traffic analysis says you’re into that. It’s weird, but you do you.

The old dogs have shriveled and dried on their rollers, ossifying in their ways. They were never going to join the kids on visual social media. So it was up to a younger, plumper, juicier - let’s abandon this metaphor. Lydia Bugg has started an official 1900HOTDOG TikTok and Instagram account. Follow them now for new and charming videos from your favorite Liddy every week, but once again please remember: falling in love is an upcharge.

Finally, Brockway is taking a hiatus from the site. Oh shit, that’s me. Normally this is the part where I tell you about how some of my body exploded in a way medical science thinks is hilarious. Thankfully that’s not what’s happening, I just have a lot of crazy deadlines for other projects all hitting at the same time. I have to take a few months to focus on those.

In my absence, our excellent monthly columnists will take over my spot, and I’ve arranged a rotating cast of amazing hosts and co-hosts for the Dogg Zzone. Actually, too amazing. I fucked up. I should’ve picked garbage replacements. Prop comics and fitness chuds hawking poisoned protein powders. That way you’d miss me when I was gone. No, I chose all your hot dog favorites and they have amazing material lined up for you.

I’m not going to have a fucking job when I come back.

Bigfeets will also be taking a shorter hiatus once our backlog of episodes run out. But Jason and Sean will still be doing new episodes! Those will be about Mountain Monsters/bigfoot related subjects, not episodes of the show itself.

I know you’ll miss me. I will miss you. If I have time. Which I will not. So I need you to miss both of us extra hard to make up for it.