XaiJu
personalias
personalias

patreon


Thank you all!

So true story.

When I was at one of my lowest points of my life, I cried every day on the way to work.   Guaranteed.  The thought of going to my job every day and the drive to my job sent me into an anxiety attack where I inevitably would cry and scream in traffic.

You know that anxiety and discomfort you feel when you go to the dentist? The "I don't want to do this but I feel I have to" anxiety. Yeah, you can suck it up when you get there but the trip over is the WORST.   Imagine that feeling every day.  

Emotionally speaking, every day I would get up, drive to the dentist, get my teeth drilled, and drive back home, too exhausted to do much other than sleep to escape the stress of being conscious.  Some afternoons I'd cry in frustration, too; though it wasn't a sure thing.

When I was nearing my breaking point, I called my wife and talked to her.  And I would talk about whatever commission I was working on or what writing I was going to be doing on the weekend.

Then, my wife said something that struck me:  "You consistently sound more proud of your writing than you have of than your job in years."

And it was true.  It was absolutely true.  I love writing.  My worst day writing is still better than most days at my last job.  It gives me life.  It makes me feel whole.  I started writing as a way to reach out and share my crazy ideas with other folks, and it's become an integral part of my identity.

A year and a half ago, I looked at my savings, quit my job, and started this Patreon.  I imagined that maybe I could make up the difference between my lost wages from my old job by writing a bit and getting an entry level job and combing the difference.

Except that entry level job never happened.  I've just been writing and writing and writing and miracle of miracles, it's getting better!

And in a large way, I have all of you to thank.  Today, this patreon has hit 250 patrons.  Not only is it a personal best, but it's higher than I imagined possible when I started this venture.  I'm literally shaking as I type this.

Thank you.  It's your support that is giving me so much confidence in myself and making me have to fight back happy tears so that I can see the screen.  Thank you, all of you for taking a chance on me and my crazy imagination.  Thank you for your support so that I can try and make this my "real" job.

I literally couldn't do it without you.

I'm not perfect by any measure. I make mistakes, (and not just typos), but I try to do right (and write) by the people who help me.

Sincerely and without regret,
Personalias

P.S. You all are much better bosses than Mrs. Brollish.



Comments

Thanks! I will. I'm just trying to express my appreciation while making a good product.

Hey, obviously it's awesome work if you've got all these fans eh? Be proud, be happy, you deserve it man! I'm glad to hear how this has all positively affected your life, this is why Patreon exists. Keep on keeping on <3

154Charlie

And I'm trying to get better! Thank you for helping me have the time to try.

Good writers are few and far between in our community. In my opinion however, you're the best.

You've helped me feel good.

It makes people feel good, to help other people feel good. I feel good right now. :)

I don't reply to everything you say, but I am always gratified by you taking the time to share your thoughts and say it.

I don't have anything creative to say. You deserve to feel good about this. You're living the dream

I will! Thank you! You're kind of a patreon role-model if you don't mind me saying.

You derserve it, keep going!

Well, I know you know this, but your own brand of mental regression/altered reality horror is something that pushed me to do my own writing journey. So this is just a positive feedback loop, here. Mood on the bad acting. Actually gives me an idea that I might have to file away for later.

I quite enjoy your new line of work, and the products you produce. I’m hoping that I can shamelessly rip off some parts of your ABDL Elm Street story and maybe even finish AND post it. But except for that, your stories keep inspiring me to write. Not enough to actually post anything. But a few pages here and there. Maybe eventually I can slap something up. I’ve been working on a script for a horror abdl film, now I just need a few hundred K and a few actors that can be convincing. Why do so many abdl videos suck.... Anyways.... Thank you for your contributions. You never know when something you do will provide the push other people need to be authors themselves. And write more mental regression horror. It’s almost perfectly drawn out and deliciously humiliating the way you write.

Thank you for being one of them and for regularly commenting!

I’ve followed your work since Dante’s Infanzia and I’ve always admired your writing style. The detail given to each character really makes you care about them. You’re the only Patreon I’m signed up for, but that’s because you’re worth it. Congrats on 250 Patreon’s!

Thank you so much. Writing for me is a way to kind of reach out to people and share my random thoughts. It's good to know that other people vibe with them.

Congrats! Your writing is second to none and alot of your observations and witticisms about the ABDL lifestyle in general have echoed my own sentiments and experiences! Wishing you much success in the future!

Eberhardt85

Improvement is the goal. I think I'm pretty good, but I always want to get better. If memory serves me right, didn't you and I workshop some things a few years ago? Panolina, maybe?

I remember a lot of those early interactions. If my writing inspired talented writers like you (not to mention a few others in this thread) to dip their toes in the pool, then I think in a weird way I've put some good out in the world. Fingers crossed on the 500 subscribers. It's something I hope to achieve, but it seems so far away. I'm content to celebrate where I am today. Tomorrow though? ;)

Thank you. I think dialogue is one of my strengths. Don't be a husk anytime soon, though, okay? Take care of yourself.

Oh wow! You've invested so much into me! I'm floored! Cushypen is a good site, but it's not a cheap one, especially if you're there for only me. Not to be greedy, but I don't plan on stopping here. But I'm also not gonna take for granted the people who are helping me and loving my work in the here and now.

You are a gem to the community and an inspiration to many writers. I remember the very first story you penned on Fox Tails Times. All these years later you only improved and continued to do what makes you happy. Much respect.

I usually lurk and just read the updates I get in emails without logging in to comment, but I really wanted to come in and reply to this one. I'm so glad you're able to do what you love. Your writing is what inspired me to start creating AB/DL fiction way back in the day - Maybe someone else was doing it, but at the time, you were the only person I knew who was really elevating the craft beyond being just about inventing diaper-related scenarios and turning it into a real story. I wanted to be a writer like you. Congratulations. You deserve it a million times over, and I'm hoping that someday not too far away we'll be celebrating 500 subscribers. :)

The stuff you posted on deviant art was what lured me in. Your like an angler fish in the dark just twitching and then wham. Mad respect for ya. The way you create the world's to your story's and the dialog between the characters. Keep it up you've got a subscriber till I'm a withered old husk.

Djangosolarboy

your work is amazing and your worth more then you get now and I hope one day you get it all of it and more. I'm subbed to cushy pen ONLY because of your work. I often worry that writers get burned out writing their stories and it brings a little joy to my life knowing that getting to write these stories is something you care about so much. Keep up the great work.

I mean, I can get a little cranky from time to time, and I definitely get nervous talking online and face to face, but I try to do right by people. Thank you so much!

Way to go Personalis. I don't know you personally but from your posts on various media, you seem like a real genuinely nice guy. I can't speak for others but that's why I support you. All the great stories you do is just a bonus. Cheers!

Good. Life's too short to hate your job.

I can afford it. I’m actually doing pretty well right now. Making a little more then I am used to and only working 36 hours a week and only 3 days a week. It’s hard work, but I’m definitely enjoying it.

Guilend

I really appreciate that. Don't support me if you can't afford it though.

You’re a fantastic writer and I’ll remain a Patreon even if it’s the only one I can afford. I’ve enjoyed everything you write.

Guilend

To quote Futurama: "When push comes to shove, you gotta do what you love, even if it's not a good idea." The more I keep going the more I think maybe it wasn't such a bad idea after all. So I figure I gotta be doing something right.

I could never bring myself to take that leap, but I'm glad it's worked out for you! I've been there with work before, so I can certainly relate to where you were. Hope it continues to work for you and your family so that we can continue to enjoy great writing from you! :-)

babysofia1234

Thank you so much!

And I love doing it!

You've got yourself a deal!

Me too! Thank you for taking the chance on me.

Thank you for your praise, and joining in. If I'm building something, you and other writers are building it with me.

We expect Boss of the Year mugs/bottles for Bosses Day (isn’t that a made up holiday?) But you earned this, dude! Your writing is stellar, your characters are full of life, and you always keep us on our toes. I’ll be a Patreon as long as my stinky poop job keeps paying the tab.

WitchySarcasm

Glad you are writing! I love your stuff!

Aww, you're welcome, man! I can certainly say I've enjoyed your work almost since the beginning, and I'm still enjoying myself! You truly have a gift for this, writing as a whole I mean, not just in one niche genre. I like to get to the payoff many a time in your stories, sure, but you get me so invested in your world building and characters that I just can't skip ahead to "the good part" however tempted I am. To hold the reader's attention from start to finish, that's true talent. And you don't know what a joy it is to hear that you've found your happy place that also doubles as a profession. Really gladdens me to hear. Keep writing, Mr. Author, and I'll keep reading!

nottheking

Thank you. I think. haha

im happy for you! no one deserves that feeling, and im glad youve found your calling!

Lilith June Seraph

Dude you absolutely deserve it all. You’ve given us some genuinely heartfelt and emotionally riveting literature over the last 18 months (and before!) and I’m thrilled for you. You’ve also inspired writers like myself to try doing this as well, to push ourselves to do what we thought was just impossible. You’ve genuinely made the ABDL writing community feel like somewhere that has potential beyond just straight kink literature. Thank you so much. But if we were you’re actual boss I’m pretty sure us and Brollish would mandate the same underwear ;)

You got a bork there, buddy <3


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