Acting Exercise Muse
Added 2024-06-19 16:34:02 +0000 UTCI was a freshman when Rachel picked me up.
I made a little name for myself [big fish/small pond] and when I saw her show that night she was electric. Her body was puffy. Small breasts. Her butt was cute enough, sure, but it was her soul. Her ancient, fire-driven spirit. Her thighs were so chubby. Lots of cellulite.
oh - and her voice sounded like jazz after it caught fire and your put it out with a blanket. That maybe had something to do with it.
She was very talented. Smoked cloves. Laughed too loud. Loved quite hard.
We were on the top of a water tower one date. It was a half a million dollar fine if we got caught. I was pretty nervous, ngl.
Anyways. There's more but for now that was Rachel.
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Viewpoints is a fun school of theater. Very outside -> in. Very physical. Very 60's.
[Occupy the space. Be open to sensation. Everything is stimuli]
One time [after our fling had flung] we had The Mars Volta playing something metal and dreamy and I was up there doing ye ol' Viewpoints with Rachel. Then Lola came up [she was a dancer - and she looked like one too, my god]. Lola and I liked the same authors and everyone liked Lola's body but that was about all we had in common. Recently, Lola stuck her tongue in my mouth at a party and I did the [human] thing and slowly pulled away and left her standing on the porch feeling foolish. I can still taste the alcohol on her breath [seriously]. And after her was Virginia. Virginia and I were about to get into a 4 year relationship that started by her mishearing my proposition for us to maybe date later but that's a story for another time.
I played powerful characters. Villains. My voice helped. Something in my presence resembled authority. By the time Virginia entered the exercise it was a feeling I has never felt before or since. Suddenly I found myself juggled between three energies. I relinquished control. I was being handled - not indelicately but not carefully. Examined. Scrutinized - although it wasn't unpleasant. Somewhere between being kids and adults we became 4 pods of sexual energy.
It's times like these you check in with yourself to avoid things like main character syndrome but there happened to be in audience in this particular circumstance and the audience wholeheartedly confirmed I was the protagonist in that one. Raw feminine power is so alluring. Strong in ways I don't think the mind fully understands. There's a 5th and 6th dimension to it. Have you heard the band Katzenjammer? I'll post something later.
That whole exchange was something else. I know it sounds stupid but I feel like that little exercise from that day changed me a bit? It was... friendly? Personal yet clinical. Scary and inviting. Vulnerable for so many eyes. A lot of what I try to recreate with this persona, come to think of it.
so yeah while my friends were studying law I was rolling around on the floor with dancers and I gotta tell ya I seem to be much happier
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[in other news]
You know, I thought it was the kink of breath work that scared me but as I work on this piece it turns out it's the intimacy. I want to do it [remember, I don't do what I don't want to do] but I am going to wait a bit as NJ is still OOT for work and the more I miss her the hotter this is gunna be. Just an FYI this next audio is gunna have a lot of [L-bombs] in there.
Also thank you for your kind words on social media. I went to write the Quinnspiration post so many times and just wound up crying because y'all are just... sigh. Yeah. I usually try not to think about it too much but I was so lovingly bombarded yesterday that I had to take a quick swim in that flood of emotions.
Thank you. I always get squirmy with gifts and tips and compliments. Occupational hazard to thicken one's skin in that sense. I don't know what else to say other than I hope I can keep it up and care so very much for this work. It makes me absolutely exhausted but it's so fun and fulfilling.
[okay 'nuff of that. back to your regularly scheduled character]
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two truths and a lie
I am 3 baby pterodactyls in a trench coat
I am 3 adult goblins in a trench coat
I am 3 trench coats in a trench coat
Comments
You guys are such a great group. Now I feel nostalgic too. I was trying to explain before that for me it isn't about lack of oxygen,but about power and desire. I get "fainty" Everytime I stand up, and even passed out fully once. That does nothing for me sexually, but having a mans hand around my throat while he whispers in my ear all the naughty stuff he wants to do to me...wow!
Kerry Evans
2024-06-21 08:32:07 +0000 UTCI’m late to the party here, been an interesting (in a good way, no worries to my girlies) week. But I’ve read this a few times and the youthful feel of sexual exploration is giving me some weird ass nostalgia for the couple of times I made out with my girlfriends in my early 20s, in that interesting time when you are still wondering things all the time. I’ll talk about it sort of vaguely if someone brings that kind of thing up, but I rarely actually think about the thoughts and feelings of the sexual exploration involved. Just usually it’s how I am very definite about being straight. They were both beautiful and exceptionally good kissers, but I didn’t feel any of the things I feel when I have a man’s mouth and hands. This story made me really think of all that. And I’m grateful. It was a fun visit to the past me.
QQMegs
2024-06-20 19:40:19 +0000 UTCI would like to know too because I keep picturing the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man and that can’t be right
MJ
2024-06-20 00:15:19 +0000 UTCI don’t think it’s any accident that so many young people doing theatre end up sleeping together. It’s intimacy that, until then, I hadn’t experienced. When I was 18 I was in a play called Chicago, Chicago and I played a prostitute who was sleeping with a politician. I can’t say I even totally understood the play - but putting that dress on every night and pretending to seduce my friend, who played the politician… well, it did things to me. We used to make out in the green room waiting for our cues. It was so hot and heavy and insignificant. But it felt like everything at the time because we lived inside the world of the play.
Heather
2024-06-19 23:31:03 +0000 UTCVIEWPOINTS what a bfa throwback
lucia
2024-06-19 21:04:27 +0000 UTCI did a(n admittedly limited) google search on “viewpoints” and my first thought was “you actors are weird” 😂 [I only troll you cause I trust that you know I adore you 😊] Now who can help me understand/visualize puffy since it’s come up as a description again?
Catherine
2024-06-19 21:04:22 +0000 UTCDoc, you deserve all the positive vibes, tips, and gifts. I love reading the "Behind the Voice Actors Studio" perspectives you post that share the [real/fake idc] influences/inspirations. [Three trench coats in a trench coat, of course. Plays "My Enemy" by The Afghan Whigs]
Angel
2024-06-19 20:08:29 +0000 UTCOhhhh Katzenjammer. Also now I just have a mental image of pterodactyls trying to get wing/arms into a trench coat… I’m enjoying that lol. But the top one also has a hat…. What were we talking about? 😁
Erin
2024-06-19 20:00:48 +0000 UTCMr. dR Sweetie Pie - One of us would offer to do you a meal in NJ’s absence but we know you can probably cook better than any of us. 🤣🤣 Feel free to reach out for our hand though if you need some help with [that meaty cock] the house work.
Bama Angi
2024-06-19 18:15:02 +0000 UTC🎵 I am not a person I'm three possums in a coat We like to claim its Gucci But we got from a goat Say its vintage or its avant guard Whatever boats your float I don't care, I'm not a person I'm three possums in a coat 🎵 ok, sorry, thats been in my head since you posted this & I had to get it out, lol. (Not mine, its from TT if you haven't seen it)
Lina
2024-06-19 17:44:30 +0000 UTCI love when you talk actory. My brain doesn’t work that way and I’m half lost most of the time but fully fascinated. Don’t tell me what’s under the trench coat, I like the mystery. In another life it feels, I was in a career for less time than the schooling it took to get me there. But the few times I experienced the feeling from helping someone unlock something that was always in them, they just didn’t know how to access is… indescribable. I’ve never felt anything like it prior or since. Anyway my point in all of this is it’s ok to feel the reward of your work. Thank you for everything you put into it 💕
siesta_maven
2024-06-19 17:32:57 +0000 UTC
