Wordplay [volume: today]

How many poets do you think have broken down the word desire?
(OoOoOoOoOo romantic!  Sexy!)

I think probably too many.  

But I bet you -  I bet you that not many have broken down the word

“Clusterfuckery”

(But I’m not like most poets)

[but you already know that so get down on your fucking kne-]

(woah, woah back off man. We usually save that for the end of the post)

[oh yea, right my bad]

ahem

Where were we?

Ah, yes - “clusterfuckery”

We shall take the phonetic approach

(it is always funny that phonetic is spelled that way, btw)

The first three letters are C-L-U

Which we shall take for the value of “clue”

As in,

“The day we met I had no clue I would spend the latter half of my life waking up next to you and feeling whole for it”

Or
“Everywhere I look I see our life together.  Every street corner is a clue to a memory that I never want to forget”

Or

“Remember that time I beat you at Clue and we had angry sex and the meeple for Mr. Green almost went up my ass?”

The next four letters are S-T-E-R 

Which we shall take for the value of “stir”

As in,

“You never yell at me when I tell you to stir the bottom of the pot so the sauce won’t burn even though I’ve told you three times in 84 seconds and you’ve done it every time”

Or

“Tell cupid he better watch his ass for stirring(v.) shit up in my heart for you”

Or

“We need to disinfect the stirrups before checking out”

Our third batch consists of F-U-C-K-E-R

Which we shall take for the value of “fucker”

As in,

“If that fucker ever talks to you like that again I will kindly ask you permission to allow me to kick the shit out of them”

Or

“So now that you’ve had my babies and we still have regular sex… would you say I’m a motherfucker?”

Or

dice sounds Hell yea nat twenty you crit that fucker roll damage baby!  Fuck yes!”

And we are thusly left with Y

Which we shall take for the value of “why”

As in,

“Why do I feel like gravity is just a little heavier and the tint of the world is just a little off when you’re gone for too long?”

Or

“I know you love your job but I don’t understand why you can’t make it back in time to have a meal with me”

Or

"I looked at you text messages and I just want to know why?

Or

"Why do you light up every time you see him?"

Or

"I can't find a single reason why I wouldn't want to grow old with you"

Or

“It’s funny to me how I love you more every day but I can’t put a pin on why.”

Or

"Why go when you can stay?"

But see…I… I tricked you. 

(hehehehe)

If you read all the examples you'll KNOW that this wasn’t a poem about a silly portmanteau

This was [in fact]

a poem about ~desire~ 

{DUN DUN DUNNNN!!!}

because as a poet I am bound

BOUND

to make all poetry insufferable

(I’m [not] sorry for lying)