The 5 Missing Commandments
Added 2024-03-17 05:24:58 +0000 UTCArtist parties are lots of fun. Little Shelleys and Baby Byrons engaging in buckets of tomfuckery.
Along with various group poetry games we found [wrote] these tonight:
11. Thou Shalt Not [Cum] Before Her
12. Thou Shalt Not Weaponize Incompetence
13. Thou Shalt Not Overpower thy Fish with Red, Dilute thy Steak with White, or Ice thy Single Malt
14. Thou Shalt Not Wear Clip-On Suspenders with Modern Cut Pants
15. Thou Shalt Always Enjoy the Rain
leave yours below
Comments
Thou shall return the shopping cart to where it belongs after usage Honor thy clit and g spot Thou shall affectionately smack or grab the hinder of your significant other at any opportune or inopportune times Thou shall check thyself before thy wreck thyself Thou shalt not try to fix him/her
Cosmic Remnants
2024-03-26 13:13:53 +0000 UTCIce in a single malt makes my blood boil. Thou shalt always point out the cows on the side of the road.
Jeanna
2024-03-23 00:25:52 +0000 UTCThat’s literally my playlist as well. My kids are the same. We listen to every type of music too… this morning the first 10 songs in the shuffle were Taylor Swift (heavy rotation around here), Incubus, Frank Sinatra, John Mayer, two songs from different Broadway musicals, The Weeknd, REO Speedwagon, Amy Winehouse, Queen. I couldn’t survive without music.
IndyMndy
2024-03-19 19:48:21 +0000 UTCALWAYS. This is life rule #1.
sleepykitten13
2024-03-18 02:46:20 +0000 UTCThou shalt take her/him on a proper date… if you ask the person on the date, make the plan for it. Put some thought into it and for fuck’s sake don't ask so what do you want to do or what do you want to eat? It just feels lazy… kind of like asking what do you want me to get you for your birthday/anniversary/Christmas/any gift giving occasion.
Julie Ludeman
2024-03-18 02:12:49 +0000 UTCI am nowhere near clever enough anymore for this but I am loving these, you all are making me giggle so much 😂😂
Margaret Peffy Margie Maggie
2024-03-17 23:44:45 +0000 UTCThou shalt acquire a lover whom gazes steadily into one’s eyes whilst participating in amorous congress.
IndyMndy
2024-03-17 21:59:55 +0000 UTCThou shalt always give precedence to hoes before bros.
IndyMndy
2024-03-17 21:55:25 +0000 UTCThe imagery 🤣👏
sleepykitten13
2024-03-17 18:01:29 +0000 UTCDone. They both said ekekekek.
sleepykitten13
2024-03-17 18:00:46 +0000 UTCThou shalt not expect me to share my nachos. Thou shall always allow conversation and movement to stop if the possibility of petting a dog is available. Thou shalt not judge my playlist going from Snoop Dogg to Taylor Swift to Rage Against the Machine.
Sara M
2024-03-17 18:00:44 +0000 UTCThou shalt tell thine cat I said pspspsps
EdenRose
2024-03-17 17:22:33 +0000 UTCThou shalt not knock it till you try it...
EdenRose
2024-03-17 17:20:12 +0000 UTCThou shalt not pull the car hand brake up so far that i have to leverage my feet on the dashboard to get it to release.
Róisín
2024-03-17 16:57:24 +0000 UTC
