Hey Superman! (Short Story)

Hey Superman!
Written by SteeleBlazer

Hey Superman, remember how you always seemed invincible, soaring above Metropolis, saving the day with your unmatched strength? How you were the epitome of power, the symbol of what it meant to be truly super... 

            Well, guess what?  

            You’re not the only superhero in town now, and I’d say this town isn’t big enough for the both of us, but really it’s only your super suit that isn’t big enough for me! 

            Take a good look at me, clad in one of your suits. It's a bit snug, isn’t it? Seems like you had big tights to fill, but as you can clearly see, I fill them out quite nicely, don't I? This suit, designed to accommodate the strongest being on Earth, now stretches over muscles bigger, stronger and harder than even yours! 

            Yes, that's right. I'm wearing one of your suits. And you know what? It's tighter around my arms and chest, and legs, so tight that just watch me flex… Ughh!

            And now, I’ve ripped and tore through this supposedly nigh indestructible fabric. Look at me, don’t I just look super in your super suit, it’s not quite the fit it was on you. It’s really stretched out by all my hard curves and Mighty Female Muscles… Stretched to its limit and beyond! 

            Do you remember the old weak and helpless me, Clark? I was once the damsel always in distress, the one you constantly had to rescue. I was the one cheering from the sidelines, not just metaphorically, but in every sense, as you faced villains and disasters with your might. 

            But LOOK AT ME NOW! 

            Look at these muscles, bigger than yours, and even stronger than yours. I might not have your Kryptonian heritage, but I have something more powerful. I have Mighty Female Muscles! 

            I could tell you how I’ve gotten them, but that’s boring, I rather just show you what I can do with them.  

            My muscles, Superman, are now bigger, harder, and stronger than yours ever were. I've outgrown the role of the one who needs saving, and I've stepped out from your shadow, and now you’ll find yourself caught in my shadow... As these muscles of mine are going to cast a great big shadow over you and the entire world. I’m going to be the world’s greatest hero. 

            I’m more super than Superman after all, so just take it easy and enjoy the shade Smallville. 

            Don’t believe me, you will. 

            Superman, it's time you step aside, and become my sidekick. I’m the new protector of Metropolis and the entire world, the guardian of the weak, the symbol of hope... that’s me now. I’m the one the city looks up to, not as a sidekick, not as a partner, but as its greatest and most super of all its superhero guardians. 

            So, I don’t just want you to see me; I want you to recognize me. Recognize the change, the shift in power, the new dawn that’s breaking. Just like the breaking news, that you’re now yesterday’s news... I hate to break it you Superman, but you know it's true... Take it from this reporter whose broken many such headlines herself... But none quite like this one, this is my time, Superman, and I’m going to usher in a new era of headlines and prosperity.  

            I’m not just done being the damsel in distress, I’m done being the reporter and done being the story you save, and I’m done reporting the news. I’m making the news now and I’m writing the narratives too! Shaping the tales of strength and resilience. And in these stories, Superman, I’m done being your sidekick, you’re mine now! 

            We used to joke, you know. About me being your sidekick, but I bet you never thought it would be possible for me to step into your shoes and become a full-fledged hero. Funny thing, destiny. Here I am, not stepping into your shoes, but into your tights, filling them out in ways we both never thought possible. 

            So, Superman, as you stand there and look at me, know this: I'm not here to replace you. I'm here to stand beside you. Together, we'll protect this city, not as hero and damsel, but as hero and super sidekick...  Only remember you’re the sidekick! I bet you thought it was impossible to ever be a sidekick, or ever be weaker than me…

            My strength, my muscles, they're not just for show. They're a promise, a promise that from this day forward, Lois Lane is no longer the one being saved, but doing the saving, and I’m strong enough to save and protect the entire world. 

            And as for you, well, I expect you'll adjust. After all, you're Superman. Adjusting to the impossible is kind of your thing. Just remember, when we're out there, saving the world together, that it was Lois Lane who finally filled out Superman's tights. And while they’re more than a little tight on me, dare I say, I fill them out spectacularly.