Liz and Frank

This commission for Kaiser Karlo is canonical and marks the first appearance of Kristina's dad, Frank Price! I personally thought this was a great idea, and I hope you like how this turned out. Here's how the story goes:

From the pages of Liz's diary:

What follows is my recollection of the time that I, Elizabeth Leopold Bitoni, set out on my quest to find the epic hog.

I've seen some big penises in my time. Huge, throbbing slabs of man-meat that boggle the mind and stretch the baby maker. But I wondered, had I seen it all by now? Had I already been stuffed by the biggest puds that human biology had to offer? I had to find out. And so, my search began for a dong larger than any dong I had ever known before.

The day began with legwork. I asked around, put up flyers, chased leads, got called into the vice principal's office, had to take all the flyers down, and finally just settled into sorting through all the dick pics I'd been sent in the meantime. So...so many wieners. Going through them all was an emotional journey. Some made me laugh, others made me sad, and I saved some of them for personal use at a later time. But I never saw a truly jaw-dropping man-tackle in any of the pics. It was a bummer.

That's when Holly sent it to me: Kristina's dad. Holy smokes, yo. This thing was so big, it should be paying rent. The hog owner's name was Frank, and he was single! Immediately I found Kristina, got down on one knee, and asked for her permission to seduce her father. She called me a total fucking weirdo but she didn't say no.

Holly set up the meeting with Frank and I turned on the oooold Bitoni charm. One thing led to another and before I knew it, I had this gorgeous, stunning marvel of male anatomy all up in my guts. It was magical.

And so, my quest for the epic hog was complete. Could there be a bigger one than Frank's out there in the world? Maybe there is, but it's not getting anywhere near this booty. I've got my limits. Peace out!