Working on your Emotional Content

Hey babes!

This month's tutorial I was going to do a requested critique video, but unfortunately did not receive any submissions, so instead I'm writing a post that has been on my list for a while, and something I think is crucial for growth as either in your self portraits, or boudoir business. And that's the importance of working on your emotional content.

In our boudoir businesses we work on our editing, our branding, our marketing, our posing, but emotional content is something I don't see talked about as a fundamental part of the growth equation. 

It's equally as important for elevating not only your photography (self portrait or of clients), but it's a key part in how we unlearn toxic thought patterns ingrained in us by the society that we live in. 

So, wtf is emotional content?

It's your personal narrative, it's the lens in which you view the world, it's what you tell yourself, the message you send your clients. It's how you hold space for yourself, for others, and how you process and view the images you create. 

If we're creating images from a negative mindset, we are going to have a harder time viewing those images of ourselves, celebrating them, and growing from them. Likewise, if we are harbouring negative thoughts about OUR bodies, when we hold space for clients we will likely subliminally project that back onto our clients. Which, in boudoir, is exactly what you don't want. 

The healthier our emotional content, the easier being in front of the camera will be, and the more at ease our clients will feel in front of our lens. That being said, you don't need to love the skin you're in in order to make images that evoke emotion from yourself (or others/the viewer). But if you're emotional content tool-kit is well maintained and oiled, the easier it becomes to hold space for yourself when you create images during a time that is a bit harder. 

For example, the above photos for this post were taken at a time where the best I can give my body is body neutrality. I'm still coming to terms with the changes it is undergoing during quarantine, and because of that I am working to maintain body neutrality so that one day I can take the leap into body love and adoration again. But because I make a commitment to work on my emotional content, I can take a step back from the photos and appreciate them for their art value, and the documentation of my body during this time. Our bodies are always a work of art - deserving to be celebrated and adored. And I know that in a few months I will be able to look back on these images with more deep love in my heart, when time has passed and I can view them through a different lens. 

TASKS FOR WORKING ON YOUR EMOTIONAL CONTENT

1. Challenging Photos: document the parts of you that you hide from. 

This one is not easy. I've done it a few times, it's hard, uncomfortable, but has taught me so much about learning to appreciate my body in all it's shapes and forms. Documenting my back rolls, the stretch marks under my breasts, and the way my body bulges when I twist and sit. By challenging the way we view ourselves, we can learn to minimize and mitigate negative reactions.

“A pivotal piece of making peace with our body through the lens and in our lives as a whole is SEEING our body. From all sorts of angles and perspectives.” - teri hofford

2. Journalling: asking "why"

I am a huge advocate of journalling - if you have been following along on my own self discovery journey you'll know just how important I find it. Journalling is like writing our way back to ourselves. We can use journalling to dig deeper into our beliefs about ourselves, and learn how to dismantle negative reactions within ourselves. Ask "why do I feel like this?" and keep digging. 

"I don't like my body."

Why?

"Because it's bigger than society's ideal of beauty."

Why do you need to fit that ideal of beauty?

"To be seen as worthy and of more value"

Why are you allowing someone else to dictate your worth and value? Why is your body the only determining factor to your value?

Etc etc. 

See how following this train of thought can allow us to dig deeper to beliefs that we can (slowly) learn to release and let go of. 

3. Act how you want to feel: confidence is a verb

Know that you can act in accordance with how you want to feel. Confidence and self-love are verbs: they are action works. They aren't places, destinations to arrive at after being on the train of body-positivity for a few hours. They are a constant commitment and journey. They exists in the actions you make towards yourself. Confidence exists in your commitment to loving yourself. The more you act with deep deep love for yourself, the more that will sink into your heart and you will start to feel more positively about yourself as well. 

4. Affirmations affirmations a f f i r m a t i o n s b a b yyyyyy!!!!

Seriously. This shit can change your mindset so much. It is psychologically proven that affirmations can rewire and reprogram your brain so that you retain those thoughts/feelings deep in your core. There are endless videos on affirmations on youtube! You can put them on while you sleep, or simply find some that you enjoy and write them down in the morning. I call these my "morning lines" and I will write down an affirmation every morning and fill an entire page in my journal. 

That's all I have for you babes this round! I'll be doing an editing tutorial soon where I coach you through my dark and moody editing process. 

Let me know if you have any questions!

With love,

M xx