Struggling to make audios: should I offer commissions to be public? (Poll)

Okay the first version of this post was very rambling and venty so let's try this again, if it sounds too matter-of-fact please don't take it as being rude, I'm autistic and trying to figure out how to write this without it sounding guilt tripping, I don't want anyone to feel pressured to vote in the poll or offer their commissions to be public. This poll is available here and on Tumblr in a matching post.

I'm having a lot of trouble right now recording audios. I used to be ahead by 4 weeks, and now I'm only ahead by 1 week. After not getting sick for years, I've had 3-4 bad colds and flues over the last year that have taken weeks off my being able to record and I've never caught back up. My parents have also started having the house redecorated and renovated which is very loud and taking away time I could be recording. And since opening commissions, that means I'm now recording three audios a week in addition to anywhere between 1-3 on average commissions a week so some time that went to public audios is now going towards commissions. And... I'm not doing well mentally. I already wasn't doing well and struggling with my depression and seasonal depression worsening it, but stress from my parents caused me have a major autistic meltdown/mental breakdown last Friday and I'm struggling to recover and record and hoping that it hasn't caused any skill regression or autistic burnout. I've tried to record all morning and just kept bursting into tears. In addition to this, I not only need to be 4 weeks ahead but actually 8 weeks ahead like I was last October as this December I'm going to see my partner again and won't be able to record during that time.

So... step one of trying to help is I'm bringing back compilations. They'll be one a month and replacing one of the sfw audio days. But I don't think I can post more than one of these a month without people getting upset or feeling cheated and me feeling guilty.

Something that happened last year when I was trying to record 8 weeks of audios in a short time was someone messaged me and offered their commissions they'd gotten from me previously to be used as a public audio. I turned them down because I felt too guilty about it. But I've received that offer again this year so... I'd like to know what you guys think.

Other audio roleplay creators post all their commissions publicly or have options to keep it private or public. I've never done this. I always had them private only because I thought people would prefer it that way, that they'd feel more comfortable commissioning if they knew whatever personal things their shared with me to make an audio for them were kept private. But not all commissions have personal information in them... so...

If you've commissioned me before, and that commission doesn't contain your name/nickname/named listener in it, would you be comfortable with that audio being reused as a public audio that I would post on Youtube, soundgasm and Patreon?

If yes please contact me via my DMs on Ko-Fi, Discord, Tumblr or here on Patreon. I'm not directly reaching out to commissioners because I don't want them to feel pressured or put on the spot.

If no, please don't feel guilty about it or feel pressured into saying yes, I promise I don't mind, I feel incredibly guilty even asking this question.

SFW Commissions: should I give the option straight away when people commission me to have their audio commissions be private or public? [SCROLL DOWN TO POLL Patreon apparently doesn't let you place a poll anywhere than at the end of a post]

As for NSF'W commissions... to go public I'd probably have to record a new intro and those are usually based off Patreon requests... But people pay to access the 18+ audios on Patreon, they're Patreon exclusives, and I don't know how myself or commissioners would feel about someone paying for a commission and then me charging other people access to it... Idk it doesn't sit entirely right with me? But I don't know what other people think. And then also my NSF'W audios are based on Patreon requests, but it may be that an 18+ commission was a Patreon request before you asked for it as a commission or it matches Patreon requests from others.

And I've just realised Tumblr and Patreon don't let you put more than 1 poll in one post... So I guess comment/reply to this post with what you think I should do about NSF'W audios. Do you think they should always be private? So you think they should just cost more if they're private, so if they're public you're getting a discount in a way? Do you think they should only be used for public NSF'W audios and not Patreon exclusive ones? Do you think it's right to use paid-for commissions as Patreon exclusive audios? I'm not sure it sits right with me. I'm really strongly leaning towards no I won't make NSF'W commissions public ever.

I've seen other audio creators either have their commissions all public, or charge a fee to keep them private. I'd feel guilty about charging a fee, and if I did I don't think it would be more than like an extra £5-10? Maybe? That's less than I've seen other charge. But yeah I don't know what I'd charge for that. But figured since others do it like that I'd put the option in the poll.

Again, to any previous commissioners please don't feel guilty if you don't want to offer up your commission to go public. And I won't accept commissions where the listener has a name to go public.

SFW Commissions: should I give the option straight away when people commission me to have their audio commissions be private or public?

edit: should have clarified, a private fee could mean an extra fee on top of existing prices, or that i lower existing prices before adding the fee. as in it could be £30 sfw public (current price) and £40 sfw private OR £20 sfw public and $30 sfw private, i haven't decided yet. so if could mean lower and more affordable commissions if you picked the public option. so if you wanted a commission but couldn't quite afford them you'd now have a cheaper option if you let it be public.