Chapter 212 - Radiance Class-up II

Colors in gdocs: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1Bvgk1YzzZCyF0jvgPyi27cGb7hN2WlTGfl4mZT2tIkI/edit

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Seven classes to choose from. Seven strong options.

I suppose, in many ways, that it was better than the alternative, of having no good classes available. Or only one OK class, that I was forced to pick.

No, options were good, even if I was going to end up with a serious case of decision paralysis.

“What’s the worst-case scenario on picking a class?” I mused out-loud, hoping Librarian would help me out with some analysis.

“That it’s weak, and you hate everything about it, what it means, what it represents, and what you need to do with it.” Librarian promptly answered. “The worst-case isn’t a bad class, the worst-case is a class that actively harms you.”

“Like my fear about the [Prophet of Papillion] class.”

“Exactly! The other worse-case scenario is picking a class that actively draws hostility to you.” Librarian pointed out.

I spent a moment thinking about that.

“Like the class Hesoid had. The plague-generating one.” I said.

Librarian nodded.

“Right. Here, they seem to hate Void mages with a passion.” She observed, letting me work out the rest of it.

I quickly thought about what Void was. Dark and Dark, and I had Celestial already.

“Do I have a level 8 Void mage to reset to?” I asked Librarian.

She shook her head.

“No, just a level 8 Darkness mage. Should be easy enough to get a Void mage offered at 32. Probably be weak, but doable.”

I thought about that for a brief moment before shaking my head and discarding the idea entirely.

“No, let’s stick with the current offerings.” I said. “They’re all solid, and none of them. actively harm me.” I mused out loud. “It’s a question of balancing the present against the future.”

“Right. Now, what’s the argument for the classes with the more powerful stats now?” Librarian asked.

“Escaping, freedom, survival.” I said, rapidly listing the three points off.

“Are we in a cage, with an execution scheduled for next week? Are we chained to other slaves, about to be auctioned off? If the dwarves are as good as their word, and we stick around 30 years, able to explore and enjoy this city, what harm have we come to?” Librarian asked, and I winced.

She had a bit of a point. It could be so much worse. I was a favored bird in a golden cage, not a slave forced to mine lead, or worse. I had guards, and not only was nearly my every need taken care of, but they went above and beyond to provide any luxury I wanted. The biggest concern was my friends and family dying in an accident before I could make it back.

That, and my violent distaste for anything resembling shackles or chains that I hadn’t chosen for myself.

“Let’s look at classes with a balance for the future and the present then?” Librarian asked with an amused smile.

I gave her a smile as warm as the cozy fire in front of us.

“Thank you Librarian. Really. I don’t know what I’d do without you. Probably get lost wandering all the options.”

She chuckled.

“Yeah, I think that’s why the System has guides. Could you imagine otherwise?”

I thought about my first class up, and the thousands, if not tens of thousands of classes I was offered, along with all the questions I’d had.

“Disaster.” I said.

“Yup! Complete disaster.” Librarian agreed.

Focus. I thought to myself. Librarian was me, and I was her, and I could imagine the wild tangents we could get on if I allowed it.

“So, in conclusion, since we’re not at immediate, dire risk of dying or worse, we don’t need to hyper-focus on a strong class here and now.” I reasoned out. “Need to balance the future with the present.”

Librarian gave a curt nod.

“And the far future.” She pointed out. “Not just 10 years from now, but 100 years. 1000 years.”

With a small amount of reluctance, I cut [Radiant Slayer of the Endless Formorian Swarm]. If I was going to be executed in the morning, currently a slave of some vile [Slave Owner], or in some worse situation, I’d probably take the class, just for the raw, immediate boost of power. I wasn’t though, which left me with [Light of Truth], [Radiant Immolator], [The Rising Dawn], [Butterfly Mystic], [Sentinel-Adept], and [Acolyte of Asura].

I was eyeing up [Light of Truth] next. It was on the shortlist due to the extra stats, and I did like how it was similar to [Light of Hope], my early Light healing class. However, it was in the running due to the “escape” potential, with the extra stats boosting my combat capabilities enough to help me escape.

Which brought it in direct comparison, interestingly enough, with [Radiant Immolator]. I wasn’t quite sure how I felt about the class yet, if I was taking it or not, but for my purposes, it was a fair comparison.

On skills: [Radiant Immolator] was far better for fighting and escaping. Everything it had was combat-focused. Heck, even the flying skill was combat-focused! [Light of Truth] had objectively worse skills for “fight out and escape”, although it had a slightly better flying skill.

On the stats: [Radiant Immolator] was +40 Mana, +40 Mana Regeneration, +160 Magic Power, +160 Magic Control per level. That was strongly tilted towards “Just do damage”. [Light of Truth] had +48 Free Stats, +8 Dexterity, +64 Speed, +160 Mana, +160 Mana Regen, +160 Magic Power, +160 Magic Control per level.

They were tied on the Magic Power and Magic Control per level, which translated to “The skills would be just as strong as each other.”

Assuming the same level gain, I’d be just as powerful from a raw “How much damage does my new [Nova] skill do?” perspective… before the fact that [Radiant Immolator] would get a better [Nova] skill than [Light of Truth] came into play.

Then, long-term, while I didn’t enjoy killing and fighting, I did have my Radiance mage class for my own self-defense.

In  [Light of Truth]’s defense, added mana and regeneration was strong for fights. However, it was a small stone on the heavily-tilted scales.

In conclusion - [Radiant Immolator] was better than [Light of Truth] in every way but one I could easily measure right now, which meant I could cut it with a clear conscious.

That also gave me some potential avenues for exploration and comparison. I’d tackle that in just a moment.

[Acolyte of Asura] was objectively the “best” class of the lot, if I could use it. It met all my requirements, it was powerful, it worked short-term, long-term, and opened up a whole new world of spellcasting to me.

“Right. Pros and cons of [Acolyte of Asura].” I asked Librarian. “How does this go horribly wrong for me, and what needs to happen for this to go right, and what are the chances of both?” I asked her.

“Wrong - a bunch of skills get replaced when you take the class. You don’t figure out how to cast properly, and you essentially cripple the class for years, if not decades before you work it out. All while the class is effectively disabled, you also wouldn’t be leveling it.”

“I’d still have [Radiance Conjuration]. Deadly beams - my main attack and defense - would still be available, while enjoying improved stats.” I pointed out.

“Sure, but no [Blaze] weakens it, no [Nova] lowers how much damage you can burst out, no [Talaria] means you’re stuck on the ground.” Librarian said, ticking the points off her fingers.

“Right, fine, how hard do you think it’d be to work out casting magic? Clearly, Asura figured it out, and others must’ve also worked it out. We can’t be the first. Plus!” I said, getting excited. “I saw Asura using dozens and dozens of spells while fighting Lun’Kat. I have [Pristine Memories], I can recreate it!” I said, working myself up.

I jumped up, and walked to another part of the room.

“Chair! Table! Pen! Paper!” I clipped out to Librarian, having all of them appear in front of me. I sat down at the desk and focused, ignoring the barely-repressed mirth behind me.

“Ok, the first one.” I said, putting the pen on the paper, focusing and trying to remember what I’d seen.

… part of it had been behind Asura. I had a lot of pieces, but not the full puzzle. That was fine. There’d been more.

“... Second one.” I said.

It’d been at a fairly steep angle, not letting me get a good view.

“THIRD ONE!” I groused.

It’d been at a good angle, and unobscured, but I couldn’t remember all the details. Not due to a lack of memory, but because it’d just been too Goddess-cursed far away to see it all in the first place.

Librarian’s chuckles became full-on gales of laughter.

“I saw someone operate on a man once! I’m sure I can operate on a baby!” She said, wiping some tears of laughter from her eyes. “Come on. Asura was casting the most complex, the most powerful magic possible, the culmination of all her knowledge and experience. We don’t even know the fundamentals behind it all, let alone have the power and control to cast the same spells Asura was casting. For all we know, each one is entirely unique, with no fundamental bits.”

I grumbled to myself, idly drawing circles with my pen.

“Fine. I can’t learn from Asura’s casting.” I grumbled. “I can use it for reference later on, but I won’t figure out the fundamentals. Maybe if I had a team of researchers and a few decades we could work it all out, but…”

“But yeah, we’d need to find someone else to learn from.” Librarian said. “Which makes this the high-risk, high-reward option.”

“Odds that the dwarves have someone to learn from, and odds that they’d teach me?” I asked Librarian.

“Pulling a number out of my ass… 20% that they have someone. We haven’t seen hide or hair of anyone casting like they do, and we have seen a few clans now. 95% chance that they’d teach us though, they like you and want to keep you happy. Only if it’s some giant secret, or someone as important as you are would they say no. Keep in mind though, this probably isn’t something that can get picked up overnight. It’d probably take years of study.”

“So, a 19% chance pulling numbers out of your rear end that things work out.” I grouched.

“Yeah, and spend years working on it. But that’s if we want to learn stuff now. We can always learn it later.” Librarian pointed out.

I put [Acolyte of Asura] off to the side. I’d re-evaluate it against whatever other class I picked out of the remaining four. It wasn’t the winner, but it wasn’t getting cut either. It’d be easier to argue for and against the merits against a single class.

That left the four light green classes left.  [Radiant Immolator], [The Rising Dawn], [Butterfly Mystic], and [Sentinel-Adept]. They were all fairly close to each other, and I basically needed to have a little tournament to decide the winner.

Actually - that was a pretty good idea. I could have two classes go head to head, decide which one I liked more, then repeat with the winners.

I looked at [Sentinel-Adept] vs  [The Rising Dawn] and sighed. Nope, it wouldn’t be that easy to decide.

Time to do this methodically.

Stats and skills first.

[Radiant Immolator] had 400 points of stats, and all of them were Magic stats. The total wasn’t as high as some of the other classes, but the distribution was in a good place.

[The Rising Dawn] had 380 points worth of stats, and again all of them were magic. The distribution supported long, continuous casting sessions, which I approved of. The raw total wasn’t as high as [Radiant Immolator], but the distribution on each was skewed towards what each class wanted to do.

[Butterfly Mystic] was crushing it with stats. 436 points in total, but the distribution was suboptimal. Only 280 of them were in magic stats, with the remaining 156 being in physical stats. They were slanted towards “Keep me alive and balanced”, and there was something to be said for the tyranny of sheer stats. The distribution could be quite a lot better though, I was less than thrilled with where I’d end up.

It was easily the most complicated analysis. It seemed to support traveling, moving around, lasting in harsher conditions, which only [Sentinel-Adept] seemed to hint at.

At the same time, I was basically complaining that I’d be tougher and faster, and that my strength would start rising again.

When all the stats were magical, it was easy to compare them.  [Radiant Immolator] had more stats than [The Rising Dawn], no question about it. I wasn’t quite going to go into the analysis of Mana+Regen VS Control+Power, beyond the fact that both were distributed the way the class wanted. [Butterfly Mystic] brought up the question “What’s a physical stat worth?”

I’d finish up that line of thinking in a minute.

[Sentinel-Adept] had 432 stats total, with 368 of them being magical. They were arranged almost the exact same way I’d arranged [The Dawn Sentinel], which I found nice.

Right. I had the stats and their distribution, and quite frankly it was a crapshoot. All of them had stats to support what the class wanted to do. None of them were bad, but [Sentinel-Adept] was the clear winner. I hesitated to call  [Butterfly Mystic]’s distribution bad, because speed and vitality were important. It just felt weird that I’d be getting so much of them, and it made it a bit of an outlier.

Ok, stats, at the end of the day, were a bit of a crapshoot. I wasn’t getting anything from them. Nothing was jumping out at me as a “Cut me!” or “Pick me!”

Next up, flying skills!

[Sentinel-Adept] had it easiest. [Talaria] would keep the same name, but lose all restrictions. I didn’t need sandals or sunlight anymore, and I’d be able to fly on a whim. I could stand, make tight turns that I couldn’t before, and more. A straight up, simple evolution. I’d be faster and more nimble.

[Radiant Immolator] also evolved [Talaria]. It kept the restrictions, but in exchange, I got a point-defense system in place. While flying, the new and improved Skill would shoot down projectiles fired at me, at a significantly discounted mana price. Instead of 100 mana, I’d use 60 mana on an equivalently powerful attack, and the discount would grow as the skill got stronger. Heck, a few chapters had me flying a hair off the ground at all times, always having my defenses on. Between that, and [Bullet Time] plus [Mantle], I ended up fairly hard to hit… from small things.

It didn’t do anything about someone dropping a mountain on my head, and if it tried to zap something big and metal, I just ended up with superheated metal in my body. That was before someone cut my legs off flying. Sure, I could regrow them - but I wouldn’t have sandals on my feet anymore, which would lead to a long drop.

As my power and control grew, so would the strength and precision of my point defenses. It tied neatly together like that.

[The Rising Dawn] had angel wings! Glowing, bright wings of soft light. I had to imagine that my interactions with the angel had rewarded me with them. They were restricted to daylight - and they promised to punch a hole through whatever clothes I was wearing - but it came with a significant speed boost. Which was totally in-line with the “Show up dramatically at the right moment to save the day” theme that the class had going on.

[Butterfly Mystic] had technically restricted flight, but practically unrestricted flight. It was only a bit faster than [Talaria] was - a strong jogging speed, instead of a brisk walk. I’d get, surprise surprise, butterfly wings, which was the restriction. If there wasn’t room to move them, I wouldn’t be able to fly. Which was interesting - [The Rising Dawn] didn’t mention a similar restriction. The “learning” part showed up again. The more I looked at butterflies, birds, and at other flying magic, the better my flight would be. Not just from a “The skill improves” way, but just sheer learning about different flight methods would let me use them.

Hang on - it used my jogging speed for the baseline rate. Which meant it tied to my speed, so as my speed improved, my speed would improve. Heh. Classes distributing stats as they needed strikes again!

I’d improve by finding different types of butterflies as well. Birds would also work, but butterflies were best. Some flew at incredible heights, so high up that I suspected going that high would trigger the wrath of whatever Sky had tried to warn me about once upon a time. Others were fast, and I could improve the speed of the skill.

Lots of small improvements was the name of the game. It arguably started off worse than the other flying skills, but could get better.

Shame I was freaking underground right now! Birds and butterflies weren’t famous for making lairs deep inside mountains.

Either way - the flight skill’s differentiation wasn’t going to get me what I wanted or needed. I couldn’t find a way to cut a class, or have one stand out from the rest.

I was undeterred. I was going to keep working at it. I was going to find an answer.

I started analyzing the rest of the skills, and how everything was put together, but it was an exercise in frustration.

All of the classes had skills that supported what they were, and how they wanted to evolve. All of the classes were good.

I was pacing in front of the fire as I finished the last skill analysis, the last comparison. I threw myself into the chair, letting myself sink into it.

“I need help.” I told Librarian. “I’m struggling to decide here.”

“Yeah, it’s tough.” She agreed. “Let’s look at it from another direction.”

“I’m game. Anything.” I said.

“First off, with everything we’ve seen - are any of them wrong?” She asked. “Will we regret being [Sentinel-Adept] instead of [The Rising Dawn]?”

“No.” I said, starting to see where she was getting at.

“Worse-case, we can flip a coin three times, then compare it against Acolyte.” She said. “Let fate decide what we want, and we’ll be ok with it.”

I slowly nodded.

“Better to make a choice, than no choice.” I said. She shook her head.

“No, listen. None of them are bad. We’ll be happy with any of the four. They are all us, they’re all some aspect of who we are.” She said. “You are a Butterfly Mystic. You are The Rising Dawn. You are a Sentinel-Adept. Lastly, you are a Radiant Immolator. That’s all you. The question is - which one do you want to be?”

I blinked, processing. That was an excellent point.

I was all of those. The question was, which aspect did I want to focus on? Did I want to focus on grand heroics? Learning magic? Blowing things up? Or just, the “plain and simple” Sentinel?

[Sentinel-Adept] got cut as I was mulling it over. I’d even initially hinted at it when I saw the class. I wanted to be more than just “another Sentinel.” I wanted to be more than just a one-dimensional being.

By similar reasoning, I cut [Radiant Immolator]. I had no problems blasting monsters to pieces, nor did I hesitate to fight other people.

I didn’t like doing it though. I didn’t want to have to kill monsters and fight people. It was out of necessity, not love. Demand, not desire.

The other classes would also help me stay alive.

That left two classes, before I needed to compare it against [Acolyte of Asura].  [The Rising Dawn] versus [Butterfly Mystic].

I boiled it down, and down, and down some more, and found that, fundamentally, it became a simple question.

Did I see myself as - or did I want to be - Supergirl? Or was I the quiet person tucked away in the corner of a library, reading books and learning more about the world?

On one hand, I loved the idea of heroics. I loved being the center of attention, of swooping in and saving the day. Sure, I didn’t like the escort I had - but something fluttered in my heart when I was seen and recognized as Sentinel Dawn, the heroine, the savior. I enjoyed walking into an infirmary, and healing every single soul in there. I even liked the look on the adventurer’s faces, after I single-handedly killed nearly every single pirate on the ship. I undeniably liked the attention and accolades from being heroic.

On the other hand, I was currently curled up in a fluffy chair in a library with a book. My soul hadn’t changed, there was no lying about who or what I was.

… At the same time, calling it a “Sit in the library and read” class was horribly wrong. It was a “Get out of the library and learn stuff hands-on” class. It was a “Slice people open to discover how they tick” class. It was a “Go poke unicorns 10x your level and ask them for tips” class.

It was a “Join a team of Rangers and have them train you” class.

I’d learned more in a month of being with the Rangers than I’d learned in years in Aquiliea. I’d gotten more out of a single talk with Night than a whole book.

Between “fantastic heroics” and “poking people to learn things”, which one did I like more?

It was tough. The two classes were basically perfectly balanced against each other.

“Got any ideas before I flip a coin?” I asked Librarian.

“[Pristine Memories] and [Passionate Learning] both support and help [Butterfly Mystic].” She said. “It’s not a lot, all things considered, but…” She trailed off, shrugging, knowing that I’d get the rest of the message.

She was right, it wasn’t much. It was just a single feather on the scales.

A single feather, from a newly hatched chick’s downy fuzz, but when the scales were well-calibrated and perfectly even, it was enough to tip them a hair.

“So it’s [Butterfly Mystic] then.” I said, a bit surprised. I wouldn’t have guessed it would come out on top.

I took [Acolyte of Asura] out, ready for the last round. Was [Butterfly Mystic] better than it? Which class did I want more? Fancy spellcasting? Or more standard fare?

Did I think I could pull off what was needed to make [Acolyte of Asura] work? Could I learn how to make cool magic spells like Asura did?

Librarian coughed softly.

“Yes?” I asked her, somehow not annoyed that she’d interrupted my musings.”

“Well… [Butterfly Mystic] lets you pick up new magics as you see them, right?” She asked, when we both knew the answer.

“Right… oh. OH!” I said, the pieces clicking together. “If I ever meet someone who can teach me how to cast like this, I can get the fundamental skill from them!!” I said, jumping out of my chair.

I deflated.

“Hang on. [Acolyte of Asura] needed a bunch of skills to work. There’s not one fundamental skill.”

“Let’s talk about this.” Librarian said. “I’ll advocate against the class, you advocate for it. Let’s see what arguments we can hammer out, and what conclusions we come to.

“[Acolyte of Asura] is an advanced class, with a huge amount of power behind it. It has twice the stats of [Butterfly Mystic]. It’s like comparing your [The Dawn Sentinel] to your [Light of Hope] class. Yeah, one’s got much better skills, and can do a lot more. However, your interest in casting like this is fledgeling. New. What if you hate it? What if you can’t use it well in a fight? Is it worth changing everything we do for it?” She asked. “However, with [Butterfly Mystic] we get to dip our toes into it gently if we find a teacher. We’d need a teacher anyways. Sure, it’s not half as good, but it gives us options to improve and evolve, depending on what we find.”

“Sure, but the sheer power of the class suggests I’m going to almost double my stats.” I pointed out. “There’s something to be said for becoming almost twice as strong.”

I thought about it more.

“In addition, if I can figure this out, I’ll be another frontrunner. Another ‘human first’.”

“You assume.” Librarian said. “Plus, then your focus is going to be split in half. You’re already stretched thin, teaching Autumn, teaching Rangers, teaching at Artemis’s school, healing people. Now you’re going to add a whole new field of study, one that you don’t even know if you’ll learn?”

“I’m going to be immortal. What’s a few extra projects running around? Plus, then I’ll have ways of leveling up both classes, instead of [Ranger-Mage] stalling out every time I’m in town.”

“But we’re not comparing against [Ranger-Mage]. We’re comparing against [Butterfly Mystic]. Which also levels peacefully.”

“It requires new experiences, which won’t be found in a town that we’ve lived in for centuries!”

“I think a direct comparison is bad.” I said, not liking being on the losing end of the argument. “[Acolyte of Asura] is the better class. I think the better question is - what’s my risk tolerance? How much of a gamble am I willing to make?” I said.

“I think the better question is, how many decades is it going to be until we find a way to use the class well? And assume we make it back home - how is crippling your class for the foreseeable future going to go over with Night and the rest of the Sentinels?” Librarian analyzed, starting to pace in front of me.

I pursed my lips at that. Shit. I’d been so focused on the short term and the long term that I completely forgot the medium term.

“On one hand, not great.” I admitted. My missions had rarely been ‘just heal things.’ “On the other? I’d have a ton of stats to throw at any problem. Which would also strengthen [The Dawn Sentinel]. Bit of a wash.”

Librarian shrugged. “End of the day, it’s risk tolerance. Do you want to gamble?”

I did like gambling - a bit. In moderation. When I could tilt the table a bit towards me. Like when I gambled with the other Sentinels, and played them to make me win a hand. When I bet I could drink people under the table, knowing that I could cure myself of alcohol.

Then - I walked away from the table. I took the small win I knew I could get, and I walked away when the outcome was uncertain. I’d utterly missed my “sure” gamble with the dwarves and their ale, and been punished for it. Not even my “sure-thing” gambles always paid off.

I gambled - on small things. I gambled - for fun, with small amounts of pocket change. Well, large for other people, but I was relatively wealthy.

I didn’t take all my money to a high stakes game. I didn’t bet everything I had.

I didn’t take large gambles. Not since I ran away from home, and even that felt more like it was “do or die”, rather than a risk.

An unnecessary risk, since I had a powerful, perfectly viable option right in front of me.

“Right. [Butterfly Mystic] it is!” I said, picking up the book.

Ha! Back to the bug theme. I’d started off as [Firebug], and it seemed that I couldn’t quite escape it.

Now that the choice was made, I briefly let myself indulge in secondary aspects, enjoying the class. I liked the name. I thought it was super pretty. Plus, who would believe me?

“Yes, my ‘firing lasers all over the place’ class? [Butterfly Mystic].”

I spent a few more minutes cooing over my choice, reading through the book again.

I hesitated. I didn’t want to go. I didn’t want to leave. Librarian gently took my hand, and gently pulled on it.

“Elaine. You’ve made your choice. It’s time.” She said, leading me down the stairs.

“But I don’t want to leave you!” I cried out. “I don’t know how long it’ll be before I see you again.”

Librarian smiled sadly at me.

“I know. But remember - I’ll always be here, inside you.” She said, touching my heart with a single elegant finger. “I am you, and you are me. I’m not gone - just more apart of you, so close you can only hear me whisper.”

We made it to the checkout desk, and I gave her a great big crushing hug, her Sentinel armor somehow not hurting or getting in the way. Soulspace rules. I tried to linger, to stay, to be with her some more. To be with her, with me.

“I don’t want to go.” I cried into Librarian’s arms. “I don’t want to leave you. To not see you for decades, if not longer.”

Librarian entertained me, and we spent an immortal moment together. A moment that was but an instant, an entire lifetime, and would need to last me decades or centuries.

But all things must come to an end, and with great reluctance, fingers trailing slowly behind as I tried to elongate this one last moment, I eventually had to let go. All good things must come to an end, and with my skills, this would not be the end.

“See you soon.” I whispered.

I woke up to a flood of notifications.

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Chibi Elaine! Going to post this "formally" tomorrow, when it's less of a spoiler.

https://imgur.com/a/zDBj7UZ