Disintegrity 54 hd
Added 2020-08-31 23:29:01 +0000 UTCNothing new to see here, I believe this page was remade not too long ago... So I got nothing special to say about it !
In other news, I have still a bunch of commission to knock down that'll keep me from posting comics for a while. There's a catch, not that it'll necessarily interest you. So, there's three I have sketched and have to color and ink, there's one I sketched and am waiting on the client's words on whether I can go on and there's one that's barely sketched at all.
The catch is that two of these are comics pages ! So technically, I would post them here, unless the client tells me not to.
But anyway, you've been updated, we good, now I have to pose this Disintegrity oage everywhere.
Comments
Hmmmm can't say I felt that way, obviously. I do think there's a sense of surprise that's lost in the new page but I needed to balance it with a sense of pacing, the best solution would have been to keep 54 the same in terms of layout and then add a new page afterwards that lingers on the action the same way 2/3 of new 54 does. But I didn't want to add new pages for a few reasons so I had to make do and concluded that having the cumshot feel like it's lasting a little while longer instead of just focusing on the surprise element of it was the best I could do, especially since the fact that Zee is unsure as to how to properly blow someone is somewhat incoherent with the rest of the sex scenes where he is by all account (well by one account, Larsen's) doing very good. I can kinda feel how the middle panel where we see Larsen gripping tightly onto Zee's butt is perhaps a little too clear and the page could have benefited from not showing his expression. But when I redid the page, this panel was just an expansion of one placed in a similar position in the old 54.
RodVonBoche
2020-09-01 12:04:52 +0000 UTCIn my opinion the old version, where the "surprise gush" is at the end of the page, is a key point in the story. While Larsen is tight and nervous and unsure, his body just reacts, revealing Larsen's passion for Zee, though his mind is still not ready to admit to that. Larsen's reaction in the next page - curling up, crying, passionately hugging Zee - shows, in my opinion, that Larsen is mentally catching up with what his body has just stated clearly. That becomes even more severe through the fact that Zee didn't do a good (blow) job at all. Actually I found that cute in the old version, Zee being unsure what to do and just fiddling around. And it makes it unfair that Zee laughed at Larsen on page 48, when Larsen admits that he doesn't know what to do when trying to blow Zee. The order of things and what I understood as the climax of the page (pun definitly intended) has changed now in the new version, masking the significance (in my opinion) of that sudden, unintended and revealing gush. I'm not sure about what to do with it yet. The new version is clearly better than the old one by means of artistic value, visual clearness and style. I might miss the details in evidence of the state of mind and emotion especially of Larsen of the old version, though. (And I'm happy about getting a second chance to tell about those thoughts of mine here, because I missed it when the original remade page 54 was posted.)
Eldkatten
2020-09-01 08:32:37 +0000 UTC
