Last summer art (wip) + AnimeNYC + personal stuff

I'll post the finished art today~!

https://twitter.com/rosuuri/status/1567673468614807552

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I'm attending Anime NYC on Nov 18-20 in New York!!

If the plushies arrive on time I'll have rosubun plushies, con-exclusive merch, posters, artbook and wallscrolls in the convention! I got a huge space so I'll do my best to decorate it nicely. Please visit me when you have time~! 

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Some personal stuff (please skip if you don't want to read sad artist story)

Please don't share or screenshot any part of this post outside patreon. I'm only comfortable sharing this here. Thank you!

I normally don't share things like this online because I want my pages to be positive or be a source of inspiration to people. I feel like sad thoughts and struggles like this don't help. I'm not very good at expressing my thoughts because I put all my experience points in art but I'll try!

I'll be taking a 2 week break from posting new art on Twitter!

I think I'm past my burnout point. I didn't take a break from work ever since the pandemic started. I think it's been 2 years now. I've been fortunate to receive amazing opportunities and I did my best to work hard, do rush work and finish everything on time even if I had elbow injuries from working. It was an amazing experience and I want to do more but as much as I want to be a rosubot I am not. ヘ（。□°）ヘ

The Dream

I have this dream for a long timeーI want to draw more original work and I want my original character/s be loved by my fans. For that to happen I need to have time to draw original stuff but lately I feel like I don't. 

I started declining work and even work that I really like because I don't have energy to draw and I feel like the quality won't be good if I forced myself to draw. 

I do work that I like and not because of the pay. Most of the work I accepted didn't pay well but it was very satisfying to see the final product. I don't have big financial needs. I just want enough money that I can afford expensive US medical bills and enough to pay for my living expenses and parents' living expenses. I don't spend much and I don't own anything like a house or a car to pay for.

Social Media

Despite not having as many deadlines as I'm used to I still can't bring myself to draw.  I don't like the feeling of drawing just for the sake of posting. I want to draw things I like and I want to post art I think is good. It's been really hard for me to keep the "algorithm" in mind all the time. I was told and based on observation, if I don't post at least weekly on social media it'll be very bad for my growth so I still try to draw/post. 

A random unfortunate thing happened, the Twitter algorithm decided to shadowban me so my posts and account do not appear in people's searches and feed and I lose 30-50 followers a day. It's been happening to more and more artists this year. I think that's the nail in the coffin for me. I was advised to not post on Twitter until it's gone. I didn't for a week and it's still there so I'll go on an extended break starting next week. 

Recharge Time

I'll use this time to practice, improve and draw originals without the pressure of social media. I'll still be on my side account interacting with fans, posting stream announcements and share fanart. I will continue to stream on Twitch every weekend since it's the only time I think I can fully interact with fans. Nothing will change in Patreon I will still send out rewards and do mentoring responsibilities! 

I've saved up enough and earned enough in Anime Expo that I can take up to a month off. Hopefully by then I feel refreshed and my account restored \o/!

I appreciate your support and patience! Thank you! If you read up to this point I hope I was able to convey my feelings and thoughts well. Please take care of yourself and stay healthy! ( ´ ▽ ` )ﾉ