Daily sketch #154 // Nero

Hey guys,

I know you've expected that I won't be able to miss a day of daily sketches unless I am quite literally dead. So, as I am not literally dead (only halfway, casue I still have a terrible headache and a low fever. but I really wanted to detach myself from how I feel on the physical side and dive into some relaxation while focusing on art. For those who worry about my state - drawing really helps me distance myself from reality and after this weekend, I seriously need it.

I'll be getting back to taking care of my husband, Ambrose and mom now. They seem to have been hit much stronger by the sickness and they still all suffer from it. I am greatful that at least I am in a state where I am able to help, even if it's just making them tea and brining painkillers. And well, making sure Amborse isn't bored or hungry.

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So about this sketch...! It's a redraw of the first Nero I drew after my maternity leave break. I drew him in May - after a break lasting for over a year :O Can you imagine I was able to not draw him for so long? It's beyond me now. But I also want to share the reason - after giving birth I felt completely detached from all my characters. I actually adjusted Lana to reconnect with her, that's why she became a mom alongside me. Not long after I clicked back with Rey, but Nero was just... Not there. And it was so painful for me, since before he was the closest to my heart. I can't tell you how much I feared he won't come back to me.

Before May I avoided drawing male characters altogether, you can easily see that. It's funny how my mental state (I wasn't well for long after giving birth) affects what and how I draw. I think it shows most with Nero.

In May I had my first attempt to draw him, resulting in the second image posted here. He feels so.... off. It kind of looks like him, but not at all. It doesn't perpetuate that sense of power and authority and... It just feels so wrong. It's been bothering me for a while. So since I still feel a bit sick today I decided to boost my spirits with redrawing him, now that I have reconnected with him fully. And I dare even say, I connected with him even more. And it feel wonderful~ It's so interesting what your characters can do for you.

He's not just some dude smoking a cigar, not for me anyway. but I'm certainly happy with my relationship with him now. It's evolved and frankly, he works better than any therapist I ever talked to. Wonder what that says about me... .-.

Either way, I hope you enjoy~ <3 I am feeling better and I am certain I will be able to get back on my feet fully in 2 days tops :)