Male Monster x Female Monster
I can remember my mother reading to me at bedtime, telling me stories of princes and their princesses. How they started with ‘once upon a time’ and ended with a ‘happily ever after.’ They always bored me to tears. Good triumphed over evil and blah blah blah. All for what? A girl? It never ever made sense to me. I thought it was always so ridiculous that this prince, someone so great and beloved, would risk it all because of some princess in a tower.
When it came down to it, I much preferred my own company. I knew in my heart that I was more beautiful than any princess could be. So, as I grew, I focused all my attention on myself. I made sure that I was the one the looking glass would call ‘the fairest in the land.’ That was another thing I couldn’t stand about those silly stories. The princess was also the most beautiful, the fairest, the kindest, the blah blah blah blandest creature. They never sounded worth anything except their looks.
Sure, I know what you’re thinking reading this: King Florent, didn’t you just say you put all your efforts into your looks? Why, how very astute of you! Yes, I do put a lot of effort into my beauty and my vanity. But I am also educated and traveled. I make myself interesting as well as glamorous.
Anyways, you must think I have high standards, and indeed, I do. But I have not given up on romance. Deep in my heart, I am a romantic. I long for a queen, someone beautiful like the roses that grow in my garden. I want to cherish me and hold onto me like the flowering vines on the palace walls. I want to drape her in silk and satin. And even if she is beautiful, I will still be the lovelier one. Scoff all you like, doesn’t everyone one hope to be the prettiest?
Anyways, it has become a pressing issue as of late that I marry. I became king rather young, my father died unexpectedly in an accident. In the midst of grief and anguish over losing my best friend and father, I became a reluctant king. My mother has not quite fully recovered from her pain. Her one wish is that someday I marry, finding a love like she and my father cherished for too few years. I love my mother, and I want to make her happy, but I feel no one will fit my standards. I feel no one would appreciate me as much as I do.
One of the few pleasures my mother has is arranging balls and parties. I indulge her, granted I enjoy attending such events myself. But I let her plan these things to her heart’s content. Otherwise, I fear she would rot away. She has one coming up, between her many high teas and the like, she’s orchestrated a masked ball for all the neighboring kingdoms. I know these are also her veiled attempts to get me to meet princesses and noblewomen from all around, hoping one of them will catch my eye and we’ll be wed.
“Oh darling,” she huffs at me as I get ready. “Do you really need such fanciful accouterments?” She fusses about as I paint my face. “It is a mask after all.”
“Mask or not,” I reply as I lay an inky brush to my lips. “I still wish to look my best.”
She takes a brush and combs my long hair. The dark purple faded into pink and then pastel pink at the very tips. I’ve never cut my hair, aside from the occasional trim to relieve myself of split ends. How could I ever cut such beauty?
“Your father was like that too,” my mother sighs. “Always so concerned with appearances.” She sets the brush down and smooths out my coat tails over my abdomen that juts out behind me. Unlike my father and I who are pinkbloom driders, my mother was black drider. And while she was beautiful, she did not have the same regality and splendor my father, and I have. She is all black, while my colors fade from purple to pink, giving me the glow of a sunset horizon. My mother’s beauty was simple and effortless, and part of me envied her for that.
“Beauty isn’t everything, love,” she kisses my cheek then strokes the soft curls in my hair.
“Beauty is a great deal,” I correct. “But there is more to life than just that.” I wink at her, and she smiles softly.
After finishing my makeup and hair, I slip on my mask and go to join the ball. By the time I arrive, the party is in full swing. People are dancing and enjoying the drinks. There are music and laughter all around. Of course, as I’m announced, all eyes turn towards me. It is my most favorite feeling in the whole world. As I descend the stairs, I notice the usual gaggle of admirers collects at the bottom.
“Can I get you a drink, your majesty?” One girl fawns.
“Let me fetch it for you, I know better how to mix a proper cocktail,” a man replies.
I then hear a snort from behind me. I turn, seeing a girl wearing a pink a yellow cape. She has her hand over her mouth and is suppressing her laughter. “Oh, this is sad,” she snickers before she walks away.
My eyes follow her, realizing her cape is actually wings. They look downy soft, and there is a fluffy yellow collar around her neck. I recognize she is a moth.
“I brought your drink, your majesty!” One girl gasps.
“No, try mine, it’s a specialty.”
I reach out, taking a drink without paying attention and sipping it. I’m not sure who that moth girl is, but I want to know what she was laughing at and why. What was so sad? I lose her in the crowd, so I turn my attention back to those who have gathered around me.
I have a game I like to play at such events. I find someone and turn my attention to them. I flirt and woo them, talking them up all night. I do this to those who I feel would be the princess from my old bedtime stories. Sure, they’re pretty, but they’re horrendously, hideously bland.
Tonight, I find a girl wearing a purple mask adorned with feathers and lace. I start talking to her, and I notice all the telltale signs. She sighs and giggles, she sways to and fro as I speak to her. She is all but focused on me. Her eyes behind the mask are horribly starstruck.
And then a drink is thrown in my face. As I sputter and gasp in horror, the girl is ripped away and instead, the moth girl is standing before me. She has taken her mask off, and her large, black eyes bore into me.
“Stay away from her! You callous, malodorous tramp!” She snaps at me.
I glare at her, ripping away my mask and snarling. “How dare you?”
“Had I another drink I would toss it on you to wash away that stench!” She hisses at me. “Stay away from my friend. Keep your terrible hands off her.”
“Who do you think you are?” I hiss at her.
The antenna at the top of her head twitch back and forth. “Does it matter to you?” She jabs her finger into my face. “No. It’s doesn’t. You’ll move on and on. Going from heart to heart and toying with it just because you can. Fuck off!”
I have never been talked to this way before, I am shocked to my core. “Do you know who you are speaking with?”
“I do, but your face is melting, so it is becoming harder and harder to tell,” she smirks with triumph. “You best go tend to that before you begin to look like the rest of us.”
I touch my cheek and continue to glare at her. “Who are you?”
“Just another horrendously bland creature.” She turns to her friend, grabbing her hand. “Go do us all a favor and freshen yourself up. This ball was fun until you showed up.” She walks away with her friend, and I am left standing there, horrified beyond my wildest dreams.
I rush away, going to deal with my face. I wipe away the makeup into a cloth and stare at myself in the mirror. I then look down at the cloth, seeing my makeup. I scoff, throwing the towel aside as I set up everything to redo my face.
When I return to the ball, things have died down slightly. There are still a ton of people, but something feels different than before. People whisper around me, and I realized the moth has done her fair share of damage.
I go to my confidant, my cousin Raoul who has his way of being in the know of everything. He grins at me and starts to snicker.
“Oh don’t you start!” I hiss at him.
He sticks his forked tongue out at me. “My goodness, you do have your ways of stealing the spotlight, but this one takes the whole cake.”
“Shut up and tell me who she is!” I shove him.
His eyes blink, four of them stay closed while the remaining open. He’s thinking. I know he knows who she is, but he’s considering if it is worth sharing that information with me.
“Raoul!” I snap at him and yank at his lapels.
“Geez, alright!” He scoffs and smooths his coat down. “She is Princess Meihui,” he replies. “Heir to the Ornate Kingdom of Fenfang.”
I furrow my brow. “What is she doing here?” I snap. “Our kingdoms have been on thin ice of decades!”
He shrugs. “I suppose your mother reached out. She has always been a peacekeeper.”
I shake my head. “Is she still here?”
He closes four-eyes again.
“Stop it!” I snap.
He snorts. “My god, you’re a brat,” he juts his tongue out between his chelicera. “I think she is still here. She’s become the instant celebrity. Everyone wants to know the princess who shafted the king.”
I storm past him, heading towards the main ballroom and see a group of people has gathered. They part as they see me and I scuttle towards the center only to see my mother talking with Meihui.
“Florent!” She waves me over. “Come over here.”
I hesitantly step forward, meeting Meihui’s icy glare again. I then turn to my mother and put my hands on her back. “Maman,” I start cautiously. “I think you should return to-”
“Have you met Meihui?” She asks with a chipper tone. “I’ve been talking with her father for quite a long time. Your father and he never quite saw eye to eye.”
“You can say they hated one another, your highness,” Meihui interrupts. “I’ve heard my father’s tyraids.”
“Oh well, hate is such a strong word,” my mother shakes her head. “But yes, it is true. They were a hair’s breadth away from attacking one another. Anyways,” she turns back towards me. “I’ve been talking to Meihui’s father, and he sent her here to discuss ending this cold war between our kingdoms.”
“She’s sure done a marvelous job putting her best foot forward,” I turn slowly to glare at her and she rolls her eyes. Her eyelashes are amazingly long and tipped with pink. Wait, why do I notice this?
“I heard the story,” my mother giggles.
“You’re laughing?” I sneer.
“Meihui dear, I hope you liked the accommodations I set up for you? I so tried to find things that would make you feel at home while you stayed here.”
Meihui smiles at her and her antenna bow gently. “Everything is lovely, your highness. You didn’t need to go so out of your way.”
I am beyond mortified. How am I even going to begin peace talks with a horrible girl like this Meihui? That evening, after the ball, I go to my mother in a rage.
“How can you keep her here after what she did?” I snap at her.
She glares at me. “How dare you speak to me with such a tone? You’re acting like an impudent child!”
“She offended me in front of all our guests!” I argue.
She squints her eyes at me. “You think I do not hear about your games, young man?” She hisses at me, her chelicera spread open threateningly. “I hear how you toy with hearts. Do not act innocent with your mother.” She slaps the back of my hand, and I drop my arms down to my side.
She sighs and shakes her head. “She told me she would apologize for the scene anyway,” she grumbles. “Get out of here now.” She shoos me away. “Go to bed and consider what an asshole you have been.”
I leave her room and return to my own. As I go down the hall, I see a rather disgusting sight. I see Meihui in the hall, she’s looking at a statue in the wall. She poses like it and giggles. She then stands on the base of it, climbing up to look closer at the face.
“What the hell are you doing?” I scoff.
He wings flap out, and she turns to look at me. Her eyes are wide and guilty. “Oh, it’s only you.” Her wings close, and she returns to climbing the statue.
“That is an antique!” I snap at her as I storm up to her and the priceless work of art.
“Sure, sure,” she scoffs as she sits in the arms of the statue.
I glare up at her. “Are you not listening to me?”
“What?” She asks. She looks her arms around the head of the statue and then brings them out, holding something in her hands. She then glances down at me. “A little help?”
I frown at her.
“Are you honestly going to let a lady fall from such a height?” She scoffs.
“You have fucking wings!” I snap.
She shakes her head. “I can’t launch myself from this thing and get enough momentum and air to fly. Help me down!” She then smirks viciously. “Or are you not strong enough from only ever holding a paintbrush to your face your entire life?”
I glare up at her and reach up, yanking her down from her perch and dropping her onto the ground. She giggles as she stands and shakes her head. “ Was that too much effort for you?”
I roll my eyes at her. “What were you doing?” I growl. “What is it you have there?”
She holds her hands back, cupping something in her delicate palms. Her limbs are long and willowy. Her body is curvy and covered in soft pink and yellow fluff. “That’s personal,” she tells me.
“Did you steal something?” I snarl.
“Why would I ever want to steal something from you of all people?” She scoffs. She then reveals to me what is in her palms. It is a big, fat, bumblebee. It flies up and buzzes around her head, landing in her fluffy, short hair.
“A pet?” I scoff.
“We were playing hide and seek,” she says, turning on her heel to walk away from me. “Good night, your majesty,” she waves over her shoulder. “I hope you’re a better person come morning.”
I glare after her. “Don’t you owe me an apology.”
She stops in her tracks and turns, glaring at me. “Excuse me?”
“I’ll give you the chance to apologize now,” I tell her. “Rather than a public one. Do it here, and I will forgive you.”
She snorts and laughs. “Are you kidding me?” She asks.
“My mother said-”
She rolls her eyes. “You are so full of yourself. I’ll apologize for smudging your eyeliner, but I will not say anything more. You tried to humiliate that poor girl as you’ve done to so many others!” She comes back towards me and stands on her tiptoes to get in my face. “I think you’re an ugly person and I feel sorry for you.” She huffs and turns away walking away from me in her victory.
I go to my room and find Raoul is collapsed on my bed. I sit down at the foot of my bed, and he sits up.
“Oh god, I told you, buddy, friend, cousin, I do not swing that way. I like men,” he slurs.
I glare back at him. “Your piss drunk,” I snarl.
“Ugh ok, we can cuddle, but that’s as far as I want it to go.” He crawls into bed and flops down on the pillows.
I’m silent for a long spell then I sigh. “What do you think makes a person ugly?” I ask.
“I think women aren’t that great,” he grumbles. “But that’s just my genitals controlling my heart,” he sits up and yawns. “What are you going on about? Are you not feeling pretty? Do I need to go over the list again.”
I turn and glare back at him. “List? Wha-” I shake my head. “No! To whatever you’re thinking.” I grumble and stand back up. “Go back to sleep.”
He huffs and flops back onto the pillows, posing slightly. “C’mon. Whats got that pretty head of yours thinking?”
I start taking pins from my hair and letting it fall. “Nothing.”
“Liar, liar, legs hairs on fire,” he sings.
I toss my brush at him, and he catches it. “Just go to fucking sleep.”
“Meihui is quite the spitfire isn’t she?”
I freeze up.
“Fucking knew it,” he sings again and runs the brush through his own hair. “I’ll bet you fifty gold that you two end up married.”
“Disgusting!” I hiss at him.
“You’ll be making pretty, fluffy pink babies before the end of the season,” Raoul sighs. “I’m seeing a little girl.”
“I would never even consider touching her! She’s contemptible and argumentative! She called me ugly!”
“Ah ha!” He sits up. “The route of the cause. She called you ugly. Come,” he pats his lap. “Come sit on my knee and cry.”
“Get out,” I snarl.
He smirks. “Too many yes men never a snappy bride. I’m going to love it when you do fall in love with her.”
I throw my coat at him, and he just laughs.
The next morning as I go downstairs for breakfast, I notice that Meihui is at the table with my mother. Every hair on my body bristles up, and I feel so tense.
“Good morning,” my mother chimes. “So good of you to join us.”
Meihui looks at her plate and takes a sip of her coffee.
“Yes well,” I grumble as I sit down. “I had a rather rough night. I didn’t sleep very well.”
Meihui glances up at me, a small smirk on her lips.
After breakfast, Mother insists that Meihui and I start deliberations. She gives us the sunroom to talk and sends tea in for us. Meihui lounges, enjoying the warmth of the sun coming in.
“You must spend hours in here,” she sighs. “It’s so amazing.”
I’m quiet.
She glances over at me. “Oh? Not so chatty today?”
I close my eyes and grunt.
I feel her hand on mine, and I look down. I then glance at her, and she sighs. “I’m…sorry,” she grumbles. “I went a bit too far last night.”
“Oh,” I gasp.
She huffs and sits back. “To be honest, I feel very much like my father. I don’t much like you. I don’t care for how you go about things. I hate it that you seem to care more about yourself than your own people.”
I look away.
“But,” she huffs, “I had no right to call you ugly the way I did.” She rubs her hands together. “I don’t know you well enough to say you’re ugly on the inside. I just know you smell ugly.”
“I smell ugly?” I ask.
She chuckles nervously. “Yes! I don’t know who is lying to you, but whatever perfume or soap you’re using just smells awful!”
I sniff my wrists. “I was told it was the finest-”
She shakes her head. “It isn’t.”
I chuckle. “Well, uhm…I appreciate the apology. I have to admit, it did have me…hurt.”
“I mean, I wanted to hurt you last night. I just got heated.” She huffs. “So, I really do hope we can work things out for the betterment of our kingdoms.”
I nod. “I would enjoy that too.”
I hate to admit that, the more we talked and the longer we spent time together, I actually enjoyed her company. She’s sweet and intelligent, she knows much more than I do in what it takes to run a kingdom. She has battle strategies and combat training all planned out in her head. She says it helps her sleep at night to think of such things.
To my horror, I find that my thoughts are becoming less and less about me and more about her. I think about her fluffy hair, it’s short but so pretty still. Her face is lovely and charming. Her long lashes make me so envious. She dresses simply, but on her, it looks so elegant and refined.
In my heart I know one thing, I am going to murder my cousin. He has cursed me, and all of this is his fault. I am falling for Meihui, and I know I shouldn’t. Even if our kingdoms end their cold war, we would still never be allowed to marry.
One evening my mother has set up a private dinner between us. Even she has noticed the animosity between us has cooled. The dinner is silent. There is a tension between us I can’t put my finger on. She sips her wine, not even able to look at me. Even though the meal, she is quiet and uncharacteristically mum. Although, before dessert is served, she stands up and walks around the table. For a moment, I fear she is going to leave. Instead, she comes to me and holds my face between her palms. She kisses me, and I feel her lashes flutter against my cheeks.
“I’m sorry,” she whispers. “I couldn’t hold back.”
I grasp her, pulling her into my lap and kissing her. “Don’t apologize.”
She chuckles. “All you ever wanted from me before was an apology,” she coos.
I shake my head. “You were right,” I whisper, and I kiss her again. Her long arms around me, and she runs her fingers through my hair. “I was afraid you still hated me.”
“I hate that I feel for you,” she grumbles. “You’re vain, egotistical, and you’re cute and funny and so charming!” She grunts and stands up from my lap. “You’re brilliant,” she tells me, looking into my eyes as I stand up. “And yes, you’re amazingly beautiful.”
I take her hands and squeeze them. “You’re the amazing one,” I whisper. “You’re so smart it makes my head spin. You’re gorgeous in a way I’ll never ever be. You’re a horrible, cruel little thief.”
Her eyes soften, and she looks sad. “Theif?”
I smirk. “You stole my ugly little heart.”
She shakes her head. “I don’t want it,” her voice cracks. She then wraps her arms around me and presses her cheek to my cheek. “But I need it too.”
I hold her in my arms and kiss the top of her head. “I need yours too.”
She pulls back and looks up at me. “What do we do? Even if my father signs on to our peace agreement he would never ever let you marry me.”
“I doubt I’d find any favor either,” I shake my head. “There has been too much animosity for too long.”
She smiles gently at me. “Perhaps it’s best we end it here,” she touches my cheek. “Let it hurt for now instead of pining for the rest of our lives.”
I kiss her palm and close my eyes. “How can you say that? I will always want you even you tell me this is the last time we see one another.”
She wraps me up in her arms. “Come with me,” she whispers and takes my hand. She pulls me towards the doors that lead out to the garden.
“Where are we going?” I gasp.
“Somewhere only we know,” she tells me. She pulls me through the garden and off the path. I step in mud and dirt, and I feel everything that I am squirming in disgust. I follow her though, never letting go of her soft hand. We cross a river, and my body gets soaked. She makes me climb a hill and go under the branches of a willow.
She giggles as she makes me sit in the twisting, arching roots of the tree. I look at myself, after all, that running through the muck and gunk, I am filthier than I have ever been.
“What have you done to me?” I gasp.
She reaches up and kisses me, stealing as many as she can. “I want this stolen moment,” she whispers. “Let’s pretend we aren’t royals at all. Instead, let’s imagine we have the freedom to be who we wanted. She sniffles and I wrap my arms around her.
“Let me pretend I can have you,” she whimpers.
I hold her close, squeezing her tight in my arms. “Don’t cry Meihui,” I whisper.
She looks up at me and smiles softly. “You look so beautiful,” she touches my face. “Your hair is a mess, your makeup is gone, and you’ve never looked so much like yourself.”
I nuzzle into her palm. “How can I begin to describe your beauty?”
She giggles and kisses me. “I don’t need to hear it.”
“You are everything I needed,” I whisper to her. “I had so many wants, but I never realized what it was I needed.” Tears fall down my cheeks. “Don’t say this must end when we say goodbye.”
She takes hold of my hands. “It has to, Florent,” she whispers. “I’m sorry.”
We take our time walking back to the palace. We both know that come morning, it could be the last time we see one another. After I kiss her goodnight, I go to my room and wash off my face. I look into the towel, seeing that there is barely anything smudged there. Weeks ago, it used to be caked with my makeup. I had been wearing less and less because, around Meihui, I felt it wasn’t necessary. With her, I felt more lovely than I could ever be.
The next morning as I step outside my room, I watch as her luggage is hauled away and I go to her room. I see her standing by the window, looking out over the garden.
I touch her shoulder, and she doesn’t move. “If I look at you I’ll break,” she whispers.
I extend my hand out, showing her in the ring in my palm. “Let us run away.”
She turns and looks up at me, wide eyes and terrified. “What?” She gasps.
I kneel before her, holding up the ring. “Run away with me. We’ll get married. Whose permission do we really need?” I grin at her. “How will they fight us if we get married? Wouldn’t it be better if your kingdoms had a real reason to be allies?” I slip the ring onto her finger and kiss her knuckles. “The only way I’ll ever feel beautiful again is if you are my queen.”
Tears are rolling down her cheeks, big fat ones that splash onto my sleeve. I stand up, wiping her tears away. She tackles me, shoving me to the ground as she covers me in kisses.
“We have to do it now!” She grabs my hand, and we race out of her room and down the hall. “Hurry!” She squeals with laughter as we race away.
“Oh, where are you two going?” Raoul calls after us.
“We’re getting married!” Meihui laughs.
Raoul girns. “You,” he pokes me in the chest, “owe me money.”
I nod and rolls my eyes. “Yes. Yes. Now shut up and help us get out of here.”
He grins and grabs both our hands, leading us towards the stables where he steals a buggy for us. As he drives away, I cling to Meihui in the back seat.
“Your father is going to murder me isn’t he?” I gasp.
“Probably,” she grins. “But if we get pregnant, his honor would never allow him to do such a thing.”
My heart is hammering through my chest at this point. “Are you certain?”
She kisses me. “We have our whole honeymoon,” she whispers. “I’ll be certain.”
I wrap my arms around her, kissing her lovingly as Raoul races the buggy out of the palace gates and through the kingdom. He whoops and hollers, thoroughly enjoying being an accessory to our elopement. I hate to admit to him that he was right, but at the same time, I am grateful for his curse on me worked. As I hold Meihui in my arms, I thank the gods for the gift I have been given. For the first time in my life, I feel a freedom I never felt. I was caged not only by my responsibilities but by the standards I put on myself. Meihui has taught me that while I can be beautiful, it isn’t everything.
The evening, Meihui and I were wed. Under the canopy of a willow tree, a priestess joined us in marriage. She sang as we kissed, blessing our life and our future together. She then gave us a vision, telling us she saw us many years from now, delighted and at peace, our children playing happily amongst themselves while I hold a baby in my arms.
“See?” Meihui giggles. “You’ll survive. But you may have to fight.”
“I’ll let you plan it out for me,” I whisper to her. “In fact, I give you permission to map out our entire lives like one of your combat strategies.”
She grins at me and kisses my palm. “I don’t need to plan that,” she whispers. “It’s already better than I ever could have hoped.”