Huntress and the Castle: Chapter Four (rough draft)

Four:

One morning I woke and there was a desk by the window of my room, and on it some parchment and a quill and ink. And outside my window a carrier pigeon! It had been a month already.

I tried to think on what I should write to my family. The longer I thought, the harder it became for my to write. It was almost painful. I had been away from them for a month, and yet it didn’t seem like it. Thinking on them just made that all the more real.

“Dear Niall, D’Arcy, Peadar, Finn, Craig, and Granny

I am fine and safe and warm. I have been enjoying myself in the castle and getting to know Vered and Nadine. I don’t want you worrying about me. They take wonderful care of me. Despite appearances and first impressions, they are gentle and kind people. I miss all of you extremely and I am ever so lonely without you around. It is hard, going from six people in my arms, to just barely two. I want Finn and Craig to know I do not blame them, everything that happened was my decision, and my fault. I used them and they were the ones who ended up hurt. I know it must have been hell for them to admit what had happened at the castle, and that‘s what kills me most. Niall, I am ever so sorry. But just ask Granny, I am where I need to be. I am at least happy as I can be and enjoying my time with Vered. He has become a good friend and I treasure that friendship dearly.

Love, Fianna”

I opened up the window and the little pigeon hopped into my hand. I tied the letter to him and sent him off. I wish I could of said more. But what could I say? Next month, it will be easier, I tell myself.

I dress quickly and head down to the library. But when I reach it, Vered is nowhere to be found.

“He’s gone out hunting.”

I have only slightly gotten used to Nadine seemingly appear from thin air. I look at her and she bows her head towards me.

“He goes out once a month.” She explained with a slight bob of her head.

“I see.” I murmur, lowering my eyes. I wonder how I am supposed to get through the day. I have been getting closer and closer to Vered each day. How am I supposed to spend these lonely days without him? I would ask Nadine, but I barely see her at all except for at meals and every so often when she needed Vered.

“Why don’t you come with me?” Nadine asked.

I meets her cool black eyes inquisitively.

“It would be nice,” her voice a slight whisper, “to have some company.”

“You’re right.” I say and walk beside her. Perhaps now would be the right time to ask about the castle and the magic I have been noticing day after day. It didn’t seem like the kind of thing that would offend Nadine.

“I have been wondering too,” Nadine said suddenly. “Why have you not asked about the castle.”

I open my mouth slightly and she smiles at me.

“You’ve noticed, but you haven’t said a word.”

I shook my head. “I was…worried it might offend if I asked.”

She shook her head. “You are a polite girl, Fianna.” She said. “But it is true. There is magic here.” She said waving her hand out as we came into the foyer. “But, it isn’t the best of magic I am afraid.”

“Is it evil?” I ask.

She stares up at the wide, stained glass window that allows most of the light into the foyer. “No. It isn’t exactly evil either.”

“A curse?” I ask, thinking on the stories that Vered has been reading to me from the large tome.

She turns to look at me, and in the light of the hall I notice for the first time how her skin looks like marble. The same marble that I’m standing on. Not only that, her gown looks like the outside of the palace. A gray gown, covered by green flecks and trailing ribbon, rust lace, decaying fringe. Her hair, styled up in a tight bun looked frayed and frazzled like aged stone.

“You are so smart, Fianna.” Nadine whispered. “Yes. A curse.” She looks at her hands and I see the light coming through them from the window. My mouth hangs open in awe.

“Are you…?” I whisper.

“I was once a girl like you.” Nadine’s smile was faint and sad. “I once lived in the palace by the sea some years ago.” She turned back to the stained glass window. “My parents were fixing this old castle up as a wedding gift. It happened one weekend my brother and I had traveled here to see how renovations were coming along.” She looked back at me.

“The palace by the-” I stopped. “Wait…do you mean that you and Vered are…?”

Nadine nodded. “We were royalty once.” She began walking around the foyer. “I was a princess, getting close to her wedding day. Vered was a prince, still very young and very cruel.”

“Oh…oh wow!” I gasped, cupping my cheeks in my hands.

“We were staying here, and then it happened.” Nadine stopped moving. “We were cursed. We became these…things.” She spit at the word.

“But who would do that to you? And why?” I gasped.

Nadine looked away. “I barely remember what happened.” She murmured softly, light rippling through her. “I woke up and I saw everyone running from the castle. It was locked up and we were sealed inside. Vered…” She looked to me, stopping.

I tried to approach her but she recoiled away. “But surely…there must be a reason this happened to you.”

“It was me.” She whispered.

My eyes widened and I felt my breath leave me. “You?”

She looked up at me, something that looked like tears falling from her eyes. “I got angry at Vered. I wanted to teach him a lesson.”

Looking around I noticed that the ceiling was beginning to leak, the walls were beginning to stain, and water was coming from the cracks.

“What happened?” I asked her with a serious voice. “Nadine, what did you do?”

She shook her head slowly. “You can’t tell him. It would kill him.” Her mouth hung open silently for a moment. “If he knew what I did…he’s changed so much! He’s so good now. If you tell him it was me…the old Vered would come back.”

“What does he think happened?”

“A witch.” She answered quickly. “I told him it was a witch. I had gotten message that my fiancé had…had died at sea. I was so upset…and Vered…” she swallowed somehow. “And when he came in from hunting, he was just a monster, Fianna. You think he may be a monster now, but he was a real one as a boy.” She covered her hand with her mouth to hide a choking sob.

I was barefoot, and I could feel the water begin to pool.

“But how did you do this?” I waved my hand out.

“I was studying magic.” Nadine sniffled. “I got so mad…and I lost control. So when Vered woke up, asking what happened…” She hung her head. “The curse…I only meant it to teach him a lesson. But it was a double edged sword. I cursed myself…I became the castle. The soul of it. I became attached to it forever…to Vered forever.”

Her wet eyes looked to me, pleading and begging.

“I won’t say a word, Nadine.” I replied.

Nadine reached out to me, her hand going through me like a breeze. “You can break it, can’t you? That’s why you came here.”

A gust of wind began spinning around me.

I shook my head. “Oh Nadine I don’t know…”

The winds picked up, blowing my skirts all about me. The water running down the walls became a rain, splashing against me like spikes.

She recoiled her hand. “But…but that’s always how a curse is broken! Someone outside. Someone strong, like you.”

I try to avoid her pleading eyes. “I don’t know what I can do.” I shouted over the torrent of rain and wind. “I am not that strong!”

She took a deep breath and nodded. “Yes. Yes. It was wishful of me.” She folded her hands before her again. “I’m sorry.” The rain ceased, and the wind began to die.

I shake my head. “No. I’m glad I know.” I swallow. “But you will have to tell Vered the truth.”

Nadine looked away and then nodded. “I will. Someday.” She took another deep breath and turned. “I’ll go prepare lunch then.” She sighed and disappeared into thin air.

I left, splashing through puddles, and went to the garden. I was glad she had told me, but at the same time it had made my heart so heavy, so sad. My heart ached, and I wanted to badly to see Vered that I surprised myself.

Nadine had said he went hunting. He was an animal, maybe it was necessary for him. Maybe he hunted to gather food for the castle. The food we ate just didn’t come from nowhere. Or did it, considering the magic?

My lunch was delivered to me in the garden. I found it waiting on a tray under the gazebo. I suppose Nadine was ashamed and didn’t want to see me. It would have been an awkward meal anyways. So I ate in the garden, listening to the birds and waiting on Vered to come home.

I spent most of my day in the library, finding books I could actually read so, for once, I could read aloud to Vered when he came back. I found a book full of paintings. Another book full of poetry. I found an old hand written journal full of sketches and prose and lost thoughts. I sat by the fire, books open before me when he came into the library.

I beamed brightly upon seeing him and I jumped up to my feet, racing to meet him. I looped my arms around his neck and hugged him tightly. “I missed you!” I laughed.

He was silent and still, save for the single hand he laid on my back. “Fianna, let go.” He said darkly.

“Why?” I laughed and he pulled me away by the back of my dress. Looking down, I realized what he meant.

I was covered in blood.

“Ah.” I gasp, slightly frightened. I was a hunter, I had seen blood before. But how did he have so much on him?

“Fianna, don’t be frightened.” He cooed softly. I could see he wanted to reach out and comfort me, but he held himself back.

I nodded, slightly shaky. “I’ll…I’ll go change then.” I said, trying to remain strong. “And you get cleaned up…and…and we’ll have dinner.” I struggled.

“Yes.” He said softly. “I’m sorry, Fianna.”

I shook my head. “My fault, completely.” My voice cracked.

As the library doors closed I stripped the clothes off there and then raced to my room where a dress had been laid out for me on the bed.

I toss the bloody clothes in the corner and go and wash myself up at the basin, which had been filled with warm water and sprinkled with rose petals. As I washed, I tried to push the images from my mind of Vered as the monster my brothers saw. Something bloodthirsty. Animals dangling and tattered from his jowls. Blood dripping between his teeth. Bone and grilse.

Even so, it had been so wonderful to see Vered walk into the library. I had missed him and it had filled my heart when I saw him coming through the library doors.

It was becoming more and more difficult to hold myself back from him. I knew what was happening to me, but I didn’t want to face it. A part of me believed that my feelings would hurt him, that he wouldn’t believe me and turn away. Was it so unbelievable that I could love a beast?

I went down into the dining hall and sat at the table. The places were set and my cup was full of the sweet wine I had grown to like. I could smell the food from under the trays, and I was growing hungry.

The doors opened and I looked up, seeing Vered come in. But instead of walking on all fours, he came in on his hind legs. He was dressed in a very fine, deep green suit, complete with slacks, vest, and even a handsome tie. He had managed to come out his mane as well and tie it back with the ribbon I had given him before.

I smiled warmly at him. “You look very dashing tonight, sir.”

He laughed nervously, and as he pulled out his chair he accidentally broke an arm off. I covered my mouth to hide my laugh as he nervously placed the arm on the table and then took his seat.

“I’m sorry about earlier.” His voice was shaking slightly.

I shook my head. “Oh, don’t. I was the one who lunged in without thinking.”

He couldn‘t look at me. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”

I smiled again, my heart so full. “You seem more terrified than I was.” I reached out and touched his paw. It was still slightly damp from his washing, and he smelled of soap and rose water.

“You’re shaking.” I noticed, too, he was cold. “Was it cold out?” I had once said to him that I doubted her ever got cold. I guess I was wrong.

“A little.” He reluctantly pulled his hand back and straightened his collar, fidgeting. He then lifted the lids off the trays. “Shall I serve?”

I nodded, holding out my plate. “Please.” He began placing meat and vegetables on my plate. “I hunt too, you know?”

He jerked slightly, a carrot plopping off the serving spoon. “Not like me, I bet.”

I chuckle. “You’d be surprised.” I sit back down and place a napkin in my lap. “I use a bow mostly. Although, I have had to use my knife once in a while.”

He nodded. “I was wondering why you had so many weapons with you when you arrived.” He sat my plate before me.

I laughed. “My brothers didn’t know how to shop for a sister. So for my birthdays I often received things like that.” I continued talking between bites.

It was then I noticed he wasn’t eating anything.

He chuckled some. “I take it they taught you?”

I nodded, trying to ignore his empty plate. “They wanted me to be able to take care of myself, should anything happen to them.” I chewed gingerly on my food thinking, I did nothing to prepare them to be without me.

“You sent your letter today, yes?” How was it I could feel his eyes on me no matter what I did? “Do you miss them?”

I look up from my plate. “I sent the letter this morning.” I answered with a nod. I then took a sip of wine. “And of course I miss them.”

“It must be hard for you.”

I shake my head. “It can be sometimes. But some days, it isn’t so bad. I have made a friend.”

I wonder if he blushes under all that fur. His ears perked up then went back and his eyes darted away.

I smiled and went back to my plate. And as I ate, I began hearing music. A piano playing somewhere.

“Nadine is playing.” Vered said with a nostalgic sigh. “It has been such a long time.”

“It’s lovely.” I wiped my hands and mouth then stood, going over to Vered and holding my hands out to him. “Dance with me.”

He looked up at me, actually terrified.

I bounce excitedly on my heels. “She’s playing such nice music, it’d be a shame not to dance to it.”

He takes my hands tentatively. They’re so big, his hands, they could eat my little hands whole. The leather pads are rough, but his touch is tender. I pull him out onto the open floor. I had to teach almost all the boys had to dance, so this was nothing new for me. I guided his hands, one hand out, the other around my waist. The hand around my waist could almost fit all the way around!

When I slipped my hand onto his waist he shuddered.

“Ok, it’s like this. Watch my feet.” I said. “Watch my feet. Good. You’re getting it.” I look up at him with a smile, his eyes still focused on my feet.

“You’re getting the hang of it!” I chuckle as we began to circle around the table.

As he grows used to it, I lay my head upon his chest. His heart nearly stops.

“Are you tired, Fianna?”

I roll my head against his chest. “No.”

“Then why did you lay your head on me?”

“Because it looked nice.”

He swallowed.

I look up at him and squeezed his hand. “I’m not afraid of you anymore. So why are you so afraid of me?”

He sighs. “You terrify me so.” He laughs. “But I am more afraid of what I could do to you.” His hand moves, sliding onto my cheek, a finger pushes my hair behind my ear. His hand is trembling.

I lean my cheek into his palm. “I trust you.” I whisper. I meet his gaze, and for the first time I do not shudder at it. Instead my heart swells, thudding to an all new rhythm, fast and light.

We have stopped dancing, and we are perfectly still in the middle of the room. I reach up, taking his face between my palms. I say nothing to him, but I have tomes upon libraries I want to say.

“What is it?” Vered finally mumbles.

My shoulders sag slightly. “I just…” I whisper. “I’m happy.”

“Happy?”

I nod, inching closer to him. “Yes. Aren’t you?” I rest my hands upon his chest. His massive heart is nearly cracking through his bones.

“I never knew what happy really was.” He answered. “Not until you promised to stay.” He leaned down slightly. “And then when you came to me, when you told me you weren’t afraid, that you wanted me,” he pressed her forehead to mine and her enveloped me in his arms. “That’s when I realized it.”

I look up at him. “Realized what?”

His eyes darted about my face, looking for something. “I love you.” He murmured unsurely.

My heart left me, along with all the breath in my lungs.

He stared at me for the longest while, waiting on me. He began to recoil, my hands gripped him firmly, still in shock. But not from his confession, but from my own. The one deep down inside I’d wanted to say too.

“I love you too.”