The Three Bears: Part One (rough draft)

Ever since I was little, animals have always hated me. I’m not sure what it is, if it’s something I do, or a smell I put off, but animals can’t stand me. Particularly wild animals, it seems. Dogs tolerate me, cats are fine, hamsters ignore me, but if there are birds, racoons, or whatever, they just don’t like me. 

Growing up, I used to live in a pretty rural area, so wild animals were normal. I can count on both hands the number of times I had squirrels chase me. There was also that one time an opossum got into my room somehow and would hiss at me from the top of my wardrobe. It’s part of why I went to a college in the city, less animals around. I ended up staying there as I grew up, moving deeper and deeper until there was no nature around me whatsoever. 

I started seeing a guy who didn’t quite believe my tales of harrowing animal attacks. He would bring stuffed animals over to my place and hide them so I would scream when I found them. He took me on a surprise date once that ended up being to the zoo, and while I tried to go along with it, I panicked when a gorilla charged towards me and banged on the plexiglass wall. I ran screaming then, and it only fueled my boyfriend’s taunting antics.

It wasn’t too bad, though. If you can’t laugh at yourself then you’re just an asshole. I just went along with his jokes, hoping that by acting like they didn’t bother me, he would give up and move on to making fun of my love for cheesy romance novels. But no, the animal thing seemed to be the one thing he clung to.

Our anniversary was coming up and he said he wanted to plan a trip for us. I was hesitant, at first, considering the last time I let him surprise me with a date, I almost got eaten by King Kong. He seemed so excited, though, like he had something really remarkable up his sleeve, so I relented and let him plan the whole trip. When the time came, he packed my suitcase to keep everything a surprise. I had no idea if where we were going was hot or cold. 

During the drive, I started to get a queasy feeling in the pit of my stomach. Perhaps I had made a mistake in letting my boyfriend choose our trip, I’m almost certain it was. I started playing on my phone, going down a Wikipedia rabbit hole to keep my mind off things. 

I eventually started checking up on my favorite website, which I enjoyed for the crazy conspiracy theories and cryptid tales it provided. I can’t tell if the website is an intensive study of fantastical fantasy writing, or just some whackjob with a journalist flare only few could dream of. It became such a fan favorite of me and my friends during college that all of us still talked about it in group chats to this day.

There was a new cryptid report about the werewolf community, and even sightings of the supposed demon circus. But the one that caught my eye was about a hunter who came across these giant boogiemen in the forest. There were the obligatory blurry photographs, which either looked like bears or sheets fluttering in the wind. Whatever they were, the story was fascinating, as the hunter talked about being injured and trying to hobble his way back while being chased by two or more of these creatures.

My boyfriend glances over, chuckling when he sees what I’m doing. “You really still visit that crazy website? You know the guy who runs that has to be on meth or something, right?” 

“I’d like to see you get on meth and try to write anything.” I turn off my phone’s screen and cut my eyes to him. “It’s just fun to read. Am I hurting you?”

He smirks and looks back at the road. “No. I just think it’s ridiculous you believe in any of that shit.”

“Who said I believe in Bigfoot and Chupacabras? I just like them is all. Cryptids and monsters are fascinating. Just because you don’t like it doesn’t mean it isn’t good for someone else.” This was not a new argument. In fact, it was such an old argument, it could retire and move into assisted living. 

He rolls his eyes. “Yeah, but all those stories are fake.” 

I want to roll my eyes in return but I keep them still for when I really need it. “So is Overwatch but you’ll play that for hours on end and still call it the greatest invention of all time.”

“It’s different. You’re reading the ravings of a lunatic and I’m playing a game that was curated and crafted by some of the best game developers-” He stops and shakes his head. “I really don’t want to get into this with you again, Mari.”

“Then why start it?” I knew I had won this. He always deflects like that when he doesn’t feel like he has equal footing. “Anyways, how much longer until we reach where we’re going?”

He huffs and squeezes his hands around the wheel. “Not too long, we’ll stop somewhere to get something to eat then it should be another couple of hours.”

Looking out the window, I can’t help but notice that the trees are becoming denser and denser. The longer we drive, the more trees I see. I don’t like this, and in fact, I’m starting to get angry, genuinely angry. 

“Where are we going?” 

“I told you, it’s going to be a surprise. Sit back and relax, there’s nothing to worry about.” He reaches over, patting my knee as if that’s a comfort.

I look back out the window and grimace to myself. I made a mistake, both with this trip, and I am starting to realize it with him. If this doesn’t end up on a cruise or some sort of airport, I may have to end this whole thing as is. 

The farther we go, the angrier I get. I see a sign for cabin rentals, and I know exactly what he’s done. I glare out the window the entire time, seething in a stew pot of rage all the way. We pull up to what looks like a ranger’s station and he parks.

“I’ve just gotta go get the keys and then we’ll go to our romantic cabin in the woods.” He leans over to get a kiss and I yank my head back.

He grunts and wrenches back. “Oh, c’mon! What’s the matter? Are you still into that idea that animals hate you? That’s so stupid, Mari.”

I jut my finger towards the trees. “I told you I don’t like the woods! I don’t like nature! You saw what happened at the zoo! Imagine me getting out there where there won’t be any plexiglass between them and me.”

“It’s just squirrels and chipmunks! Is that so horrible?” He gets out of the car. “Just stay here while I get the key. I thought you’d like this because it’s secluded.” He slams the door shut. 

I get out of the car and chase after him. Going into the station, I see that part of it is for the cabin rentals while the other half is indeed meant for forest rangers. 

“I told you to wait in the car. I don’t want to argue here,” he whispers.

“I don’t want to wait in the car. I don’t even want to be here.” I look around the place, seeing a ranger minding a radio but he keeps glancing our way. “You know how I feel about these things.”

His brow untenses and he gives me a puppy dog look. “But you love stories about Bigfoot and all. I thought you’d gotten over all that. I thought you’d like having your own Bigfoot adventure.”

“That is not,” I scoff and shake my head. “That is not the same and you know it.”

A man walks out from the back with a scowl on his face. “Luis!” He snaps at the man on the radio. “Stop turning the AC down! It’s so freaking hot in here.” He’s fanning himself and his cheeks look flushed.

Luis looks up at him with a small pout. “You keep it way too cold. This is an office, not a freezer unit, Novikov. Not all of us are born with boiling water for blood.” 

His thick brows pinch together and he scowls. “These uniforms wick heat away! I’m boiling alright. Boiling alive.”

Luis then points to the counter. “You have people waiting.” 

Novikov flenches and quickly comes up to the counter, he has pure white hair but thick black eyebrows. He’s older, but he’s built like a brick house. White hair coats his arms and knuckles, but his face is clean shaven. He adjusts his glasses and looks down between us.

“I rented a cabin for the week,” my boyfriend huffs. He then gives his information to the white haired man.

The white haired man looks at me first then down to the computer. “We have you in cabin thirteen, it’s closer to the lake as you requested.” The computer squaks and his brow pinches. He pushes the same button over and over getting the same squaking noise each time. 

“Novikov, stop!” The man minding the radio jumps up and races over. “You can’t keep doing that.” He’s much younger and looks to have vitiligo. His dark skin contains patches of white that make almost a mask around his eyes than down around his mouth and neck. His arms are speckled as well, mostly around the fingers. His hair is extremely fluffy and wavy too.

“Thank you, Luis,” Novikov huffs. He then takes out a set of keys and hands them to my boyfriend. “The trail marks everything clearly, but I will have Yuan guide you to the cabin.” 

My boyfriend then turns to me. “Just one night? Ok. If you don’t like it, we’ll leave in the morning.”

I glare at him, fully planning to break up with him after we get home. “Fine.”

Out from the back comes a stocking ranger with a long, pitch black ponytail, and thick stubble. He looks up at us, his sharp eyes are piercing and his expression reads as ‘just woken from a nap I was enjoying’. 

“I’m Yuan Fang, follow me and don’t be stupid.” He grabs a radio from the desk and then stomps out the door with us in tow. He waits a moment while we get our bags, then he leads us into the forest.

I stick close to Yuan, trusting him to protect me more than my boyfriend. At this point, I know this is all a joke to him, but surely Yuan would take this seriously. We get to the cabin which, I hate to admit, is adorable, and the view of the lake is breathtaking. I almost let that lull me into a false sense of security as we get inside.

“See, it's not so bad, right? If we stay sequestered here, you won’t have to worry about anything, unless there is a monster living in the lake.” He comes up to me, putting his hands on my hips and trying to get all kissy and cute. I give him a few smooches, but I’m still livid about the situation.

“Look, let’s unpack before we really unpack.” I take my suitcase and go to the bedroom. “Good, there’s a dresser. I’ll take this row, you can have the others.” I open my suitcase and inside is not what I would have packed. The anger comes back, much more vicious than before. Inside is nothing but my laciest panties, a couple of bras, the lingerie set he got me for my birthday which barely fit anymore, and a couple of shirts and a pair of shorts. No socks. No shoes. No truly usable underwear. Just things for him.

“What the fuck is this?” I thrust a fistful of underwear up towards him.

“I figured we wouldn’t be going anywhere,” he laughs. 

“I still need to wear clothes. I don’t even have pants! I need socks! I especially need underwear that doesn’t turn my vulva into an open faced sandwich!” I chuck the wad at him and he grimaces.

“That’s disgusting. I don’t like it when you talk like that.” He tosses the panties aside. “We aren’t going to go anywhere, it’ll just be you and me.”

“I deserve comfort too!” I grab his suitcase, finding all sorts of clothes for himself inside. Pajama pants, jeans, shirts, even a jacket. “You know how to pack for yourself, but for me, you just want me strutting around in lingerie! For what? Your dick?”

“I thought it would be fun. Even if you have put on weight, I still thought you’d look cute in it.”

Every hair on my body stands on end and I glare at him. I force him from the bedroom and lock myself inside. He can sleep on the couch for all I care. It takes me forever to fall asleep. For one, I don’t have clean panties I would even want to change into, and two, the whole being mad thing. I toss and turn forever, so when I do wake up, it’s quite a surprise.

I step out of the bedroom to see if he’s awake and wants to talk, but he’s not there. I get a sickening feeling and get myself dressed in my clothes from yesterday. Despite my hesitations, I walk out onto the path. Every time I hear a noise, I flinch and shirk away. Eventually I take off into a sprint and come out at the ranger station. His car is nowhere in the parking lot. He’s gone.

I stand there, my mind spinning and churning as I take in the situation. Not only did he drag me out here, he’s abandoned me here. Miles out in the middle of the woods, surrounded by millions of my posible murderers. I sway a little bit, feeling dizzy and nauseous.

“Someone is up early. Going for a hike?” Novikov is walking towards the entrance with a cup of coffee in his hands. “Hey?” Concern grows in his voice. “You ok?”

I start to careen towards the ground, but Novikov tosses his coffee aside and rushes at me, catching me in his hairy arms. He picks me up and carries me into the ranger’s station.

“What the hell did you do, Novikov?” Yuan scoffs. 

“She was just standing there then she started to fall!” Novikov lays me down in the back. “I don’t know what happened.”

Yuan clicks his tongue. “Well, I saw that guy she was with yesterday drive off this morning.”

“Surely he’s just getting something to eat for them,” Novikov says gently.

“With his suitcase?” Yuan laughs. “I doubt it. Go get her some water, make sure it’s not too cold.”

I start to sit up. “I’m fine, I’m fine.” I push against Yuan’s arm, which feels surprisingly solid. “I’m ok.”

“Slow down there, Goldilocks,” Yuan continues to chuckle. “Don’t push yourself. Most women would faint at the chance to get Novikov to carry them across the threshold like that.”

“Shut the hell up, Yuan.” Novikov kneels down and hands me the cup of water. “What’s your name? Are you all right? Can you tell us what happened?”

“You can call me Mari.” I gulp down the water, but it sits like a stone in my gut. “My fucking piece of shit boyfriend abandoned me.” I then start to laugh. “Oh, excuse me, Ex-boyfriend.”

Novikov adjusts his glasses and gives me a sensitive look. “We’ll get you a way home, don’t worry about it.” 

“I’m not going back, not now. The cabin is paid for, right? Non-refundable? I’ll stay! I’ll prove that piece of shit wrong.” I then grimace as I remember the contents of my suitcase.

“Look, we’ll help you get home, regardless. If you want to stay and blow off steam, fine. We’ll help keep an eye on you. If you really wanna blow off steam, I’ll take you to the shooting range and let you pop off a few in a target with his name on it.” Yuan pats my back. “It’ll be ok.”

“Yeah, but I have no food, no clothes, I might as well slap on some fig leaves and call myself Eve.” I finish off the cup of water and Novikov gets up to get me another.

A cross look spreads on Yuan’s face. He shoves his hands into his pockets and tilts his head down towards me. “No clothes?” 

The anger bubbles back up again as I remember the contents of my suitcase. A selfish mix of lace and fishnet for a man who bolted at the first sign of distress. “A fist full of lace panties and a push up bra that shoves my tits into my throat.” I look at him and see him break into a smile. “It’s not funny.”

Yuan is struggling to hold back his laughter. “Why would you pack something like that? You didn’t have any plans did you?” 

I want to slap him. “I didn’t! He wanted to surprise me so he packed my suitcase for me. He packed his suitcase just fine. But me?” I reach for the cup of water as Novikov comes back. “Thank you.”

Movikov sighs disheartenedly. “So he planned the trip, packed your bag, and abandoned you all in the same breath? You should marry him, he sounds like a keeper.” He does such a dramatic eye roll it deserves an award.

“He’s dead to me.” I look down inside the cup of water. “You wanna know why he dragged me here?”

“You hate bugs?” Yuan teases.

“Worse. Animals hate me. Everywhere I go, they just seem to chase me and wanna get at me.” I frown deeply as I gaze out the window. “He always found it so funny or tried to convince me I was overreacting.” I gulp down more water. “That’s why he chose a stupid cabin in the woods for our anniversary.”

“If you say this was more than your first anniversary, I may get mad at you.” Novikov crosses his arms against his broad chest.

“Look, I’m mad enough at myself. I kept making excuses, all this stupid girl nonsense.” I scoff and shake my head. “This breakup should have happened years ago.”

“Where is everyone?” Luis comes in, carting a box of food in his hand. “Oh-” He stops when he sees me. “Is something wrong?”

“Someone left a pretty girl at our doorstep,” Yuan smirks. “We’re trying to decide if we should keep her.”

Luis sets down the box on the table then turns and looks over at us. His cheeks are slightly redder than before. “So what happened, really?”

“Asshole boyfriend abandoned her here,” Novikov answers. “She’s a bit shaken up, so we’re just making sure she’s ok.”

Luis opens the box, pulling out tinfoil wrapped biscuits. “I made breakfast, there’s more than enough.” He shyly approaches, offering me one of the baked goods that smells amazing. “If you’re hungry, that is.”

“Thank you, that’s so sweet.” I take the treat, finding a biscuit that has spicy sausage and honey inside. 

“Could we get you to take her into town today?” Yuan asks Luis. “He left her with no clothes or food.”

Luis stares in disbelief. “What the fuck?”

“Exactly, so can you take her today?” Novikov says as he rummages into the box of food, taking out at least three biscuits.

Luis shrugs. “I mean, I guess, if I’m the only one.” He looks back at me, his dark brown eyes are lined with thick black lashes and I notice a few are soft white. 

“I’ll walk her back to the cabin so she can relax for a bit.” Yuan takes one of Novikov’s biscuits. “Be right back, boys.”

Yuan walks with me, eating from his sandwich. As we go down the trail, a squirrel appears on the path. He rushes towards me, dashing away as Yuan takes a step forward. The squirrel attempts to charge again but runs off back into the woods and skitters up a tree.

“See?” I scoff. “Every damn time!”

Yuan chuckles then smirks at me. “How long has this been a thing?”

“I can’t recall,” I huff. “Animals just hate me.”

“Or maybe, they really like you.” Yuan takes a massive loop of keys off his belt and starts searching through them. 

I scowl. “What?”

“Maybe they just wanna get to know you, say hi, get a hug.” He takes a key off the keychain and hands it to me. “Since he took the keys with him, no worries, we’ll charge him for that.”

“Thanks,” I sigh. “I’m sorry I have to be a burden this way.”

“Nonsense, Goldilocks,” he chuckles. “Not often us three bears get much to do around here. Taking care of you is a much needed breather.”

“It’s funny you call me Goldilocks. That’s what my dad calls me.” I smile at Yuan. “My full name is Marigold.”

Yuan throws his head back and laughs. “I was just calling you that because of your hair and the fact you got lost in the woods.” He stops before the cabin door. “You can call me Winnie the Pooh because I’m rollie pollie and my shirts turn into crop tops easily.”

I chuckle, he does have a belly but he doesn’t look that rollie pollie. In fact, he looks quite cuddly even if he looks like a possible sidekick to Wolverine.

Yuan fumbles with the keys. “There’s an emergency phone in there, all you gotta do is dial one and it calls our front desk. Won’t reach anything else, but at least you can give us a call. I’ll ring you when Luis is heading over.”

“Thanks again.” In the back of my mind, I was half tempted to invite Yuan inside and have a little revenge sex with him. He was handsome, sexy in a grumpy sort of way, I wouldn’t have minded working some tension out with him. “Tell Novikov I appreciate him catching me.”

“I’m sure he knows.” Yuan bows his head. “Get some rest.”

“Thanks, bye.” I close the door behind me and flop down on the bed. After a bit, I decide to get a shower. I stay in for longer than I probably should have, but standing there in the hot water, I don’t want to leave. Once I do step out, I am rubbing the towel through my hair when I hear a knock at the door. I quickly wrap the towel around myself.

“Who goes?”

“It’s Luis,” he sounds nervous. “Yuan said he tried calling but you didn’t answer.”

“I was in the shower.” I unlock the deadbolt and open the door a crack. “Let me get dressed and you can wait inside.” I quickly dash off to the bedroom. Unable to stand my dirty underwear anymore, I put on the least offensive of the lacey panties. It still feels a bit too small and it digs into certain places, but I’ll deal.

Luis takes me into town where there isn’t much to choose between. There’s a small department store where I get some food and supplies, then buy myself a pack of underwear, a pack of t-shirts, and a couple of pairs of pants and a set of pajamas. Luis is shy and kind of quiet, but he’s very sweet. He always opens the doors for me, pushes the buggy, he even buys my lunch. He is very cute too, and has such pretty lips. I can’t stop staring at them.

That evening, I sit on the back porch of the cabin looking out over the lake. I am shoving some junk food down while reading a cheesy romance novel I got at the store that afternoon. While I am reaching for another fistful of spicy chips, I glance at something across the lake. It is hard to miss as it is a literal bright white spot. It looks big, like maybe someone is wearing a sheet, but the way it moves doesn’t look like a sheet. I step off the porch and walk down towards the lake to get a closer look. 

It steps into the water, splashing around and slapping at the surface. It then rises up on hind legs and I swear to god it is a polar bear. I race back into the cabin, clutching my romance novel and junk food close to my chest. There is no way! There is absolutely no way! I can handle squirrels but I will not wake up to find a bear at my door!

I dial one on the emergency phone, hoping someone is still there. 

“Hi, this is Novikov, how may I help you?”

“Yes, this is Mari, in cabin thirteen.” I glance out the window. “I just saw what I am fairly sure was a white bear in the lake.”

Novikov goes unnervingly silent. 

“I’m not making this up, I swear!”

“No, no, it’s not that.” He clears his throat. “I’m doing some patrol right now. I’ll come by and have a look.” He clears his throat again. “Nothing to worry about, ok? I’ll be right there.”

I keep peering out the window, staying hidden like the bear can see me. Finally, there is a knock at the door and I throw it open, nearly yanking Novikov inside. “It’s not there anymore, but I swear I saw something!” I take him onto the porch and point. “It was across the lake there.”

“And it was uh...It was all white, you say?” He fidgets in place.

“I know it sounds crazy. But at least I’m not screaming Bigfoot or ghost or something.” I huff and scrape my nails against my scalp. “The last thing I need is bears on my porch!”

Novikov gets a guilty expression on his face but he then puts on a smile. “You know, one of my favorite websites to visit has stories about Bigfoot and cryptid sightings. Have you ever heard of Truth in Excess?”

“Yeah,” I look up at him in surprise. “It’s my favorite website too!” I start to smile a bit. “I was reading the article about the giant boogiemen and the hunter before I got here.”

“That hunter actually frequents here,” Novikov grins. “Well, poaches actually.” We both take a seat on the sofa. “He’s been trying to sell that story and picture of his for months now. He kept coming into the station, ranting and raving about how dangerous it is out there and how we should just let hunters roam free in the woods to kill those creatures.”

Novikov is obviously the most attractive of the three rangers, Yuan even said so himself. His soft white hair and thick black brows certainly give him an aesthetics edge. But it is his big hands and arms that dig it for me. I get that idea again of asking him to stay the night and enjoy a few hours of working the kinks from my system.

We end up talking about Truth in Excess for a few hours. It is nice talking to someone who doesn’t find it all ridiculous and laughable. He enjoys the stories like I do, and that is enough to make me feel better. 

“If you see that bear again, Yuan will be the one with the phone next. He prefers horror stories, so prepare yourself for that.” Novikov’s smile is bright and I notice his canines are quite pronounced.

“Only if he doesn’t mind my cheesy romances. Thanks again for talking, I really enjoyed it.”

Novikov’s smile is shy and flustered, his cheeks rosy up and he bows his head to me. “I enjoyed it too. Maybe we can chat again before you leave.”

“Sounds good to me. Be safe out there,” I tell him before closing the door.

That evening, I have a dream where I am lost in the woods and I come across the cabin. Once I step inside, though, I see three beds to one side and then a table with three bowls at the other. I sit down at the table, taking a taste from each bowl of food. One is hot and spicy, nearly burning my tongue, but tastes so good. The other is cold and sweet, almost like a slushy ice cream. The third is warm and fragrant, making my tongue tingle. 

As I look up from the food, I see the three beds have joined together. Each individual headboard is still there, but it’s all one single giant bed. I undress and climb into the bed, laying myself down. As I lay down, figures rise up around me, three to be exact. They range in size, but they’re all massive. They lean over me, touching me and pampering me. They sniff my hair and nuzzle my breasts. Their big, clawed hands gently stroke down my skin, making me feel soft and warm. They curl around me so I can feel their fluffy fur. I kiss each one, giggling happily to myself. 

I wake up then to the sound of rain and thunder. I sit up in bed, rubbing my eyes. The emergency phone starts to ring so I answer it.

“Hello?” My voice slurs from sleep.

“It’s me,” Yuan huffs. “Were you asleep?”

“Just woke up,” I yawn.

“How can you sleep through this?” Yuan balks. “Trees are falling, the lake is surging. I’m coming now to get you and take you somewhere safe.”

“It can’t be that bad.” I peek out the window and see the lake is frothing and there is a tree down right before the porch. “Oh.”

“Yeah, oh!” He huffs. “Gather your things, I’ll be there in a minute.”

I pack quickly and, once Yuan arrives, he helps me load everything into the tiny rugged jeep. We drive back to the ranger’s station where he makes a few calls, but the power soon cuts out and the phone line goes dead. 

“Novikov and Luis have their radios,” he huffs. “Come on, I’m taking you to our place to wait this out.”

My heart thuds. “Your place?” 

“I’ll give you a gun if that worries you. But I would rather you be somewhere safe than in that cabin where any tree limb could fall and hurt you.” He gives me a rain jacket from the closet. “Not to worry, once Luis gets back, he’ll make you breakfast and you can watch saturday morning cartoons together.”

He puts his arm around me as we leave the building. The wind buffets so hard it feels like I might get blown away. We get into a truck and he drives me off, taking us through town and then to a brick house. He gets me inside and, already, Luis is in the kitchen.

“I’m going back for Novikov, take care of Goldilocks.” Yuan commands.

Luis seems speechless, almost afraid as we’re left alone together. His cheeks darken and he fumbles with the whisk in his hand. “Coffee?” His voice cracks.

“Yes, I would love some.”

Luis motions over to the coffee pot and he takes down a mug from the shelf. “This must be a rough week for you.” He pours a full cup for me. “Breakup and all that, now this.”

“I’ll be ok.” I take the cup and add just a dash of sugar. “I feel better about the breakup than anything. Not only that, I have three cute guys looking after me.”

Luis’ cheeks grow darker and he chuckles. “Well, uhm, make yourself at home. Breakfast will be done shortly and hopefully Yuan and Novikov will be back too.”

I take a seat at the kitchen table, glancing out the window at the storm. I’m halfway through a plate of pancakes and bacon when the door flies open, and Yuan and Novikov stumble inside. Yuan has on a raincoat, but poor Novikov doesn’t and is soaked to the bone. He stands in the doorway and peels off his clothes right in front of me. 

“Mari is right here!” Luis screeches.

Novikov turns, shirtless and in all his glory. “Oh, hi,” he says breathlessly while Yuan starts to cackle. He stares blankly and I wave. Maybe this is my cheesy romance novel fantasy, after all.