Birth Days

My friends; This weekend is thanksgiving, harvest time, my birthday, and this week was the 17th anniversary of the first time I gave birth. Which means my eldest creation is as old as I was when I started dating my ex-husband, a strange milestone to mark from this side of the experience. Time is liminal right now, I’m in so many timelines at once. Reflecting.

The universe held me so tight this week. I had to cancel Really Fun Plans with Really Lovely Friends because I’m still recovering from a stupid cold. I was pouting about it, feeling low, but I’ve been so exhausted. I knew I needed to take care of myself and rest. I’m trying to get better at that. When I took the dog out before bed (in my housecoat) I looked up and thought I saw a ghost. Or was it clouds? I gasped when I clued in, ran back inside, emerged with my glasses, my giant teenaged children, and some sleeping bags.

It was the northern lights. In our backyard. I didn’t think we could see them from here. We cuddled up under the sky in awe. Together. Pink glowing and pulsing across the sky, watching the centre split open with beams of green light and float away into the horizon. Hearing each of us ask in whispers “is this real?”

It was so real. And I’m so grateful I was there for this. And grateful I had to stay home. And grateful for the obnoxious dog who insisted she needed to go out once more. And the wherewithal to look up.

(I was also grateful that my kids made several references to this Simpsons episode when I told them what was happening. Parenting win.)

My birthday horoscopes made me laugh out loud, I am absolutely coming into this next year seeking peace and divine connection. I’m already there, I can see it in the distance. I’m coming into what is next, and I’m happy to meet it. I can feel the difference my boundaries are making, I can feel in it my body. I feel so lucky to have such a creative and loving girl gang, and two VERY EXCITING events coming up where I can “submerge myself completely”. I find god, and the universe, and all that is good in me, in our hedonistic celebrations.

Here are some photos from this week, and a little prayer that you find more peace and wonder in the coming year too.

(Special thanks to Sage, who never lets me miss the important things in life.)