OslowCaptions

Cary on wayward ...waitress.

Added 2025-04-18 13:41:44 +0000 UTC

Oh, thank God! Yes, it’s true. I am over 100 years old.

There was a prophecy that a man would unlock the first seal and unleash the end times.

Apparently, I was that man, destined to end all of creation in 1992.

But there were Angels who loved creation and did not want to see it ended. They pulled me out of time and space, explained the danger I represented and then, to hide me, they transformed me and “parked me” for what was only supposed to be a short time as a waitress in 1955 while they plead their case to heaven.

They never returned. Leaving me trapped as a young waitress in a celestial conjured diner, unchanging, unaging, unable to leave this town, for the last 70 years. The date of the Apocalypse came and went and, without me, nothing happened. 33 more years have passed since and I’m still stuck as a perky-tit ginger hottie slinging hash, unable to tell anyone the truth!

But you guys finally noticed that I haven’t aged, You know about the world around our world! You can help me break this curse and be a man once again!

Or…you can just order pie, apologize that this isn’t your case and drive off in your Impala, leaving me in skirts forever…