B3 Chapter 299: Worries

**Ding! Latent Glyph of Eirnith Class Skill Available, would you like to proceed? This choice is pivotal and irrevocable.**

Accepting the skill, Kaius felt the cold burn of the System's touch as a new glyph was woven into the flesh and bone of his temples — intrinsically linked to his mana and soul. 

Flashed past through his mind, memories filling his mind of the curves of sacred geometry and runes he would need to reinscribe the glyph. Not that he expected that to happen — the only other times he’d had to recreate one of his glyphs from scratch had been because he’d lost the limb it was attached to.

Even with all of his advantages, he suspected surviving decapitation was still a far way off.

Besides, true mastery over its form would only come when he got the chance to practice in his upcoming spell-vision, something he was eager to jump into when he felt the notification looming.

He grinned.

“How do I look?” He opened his eyes and turned his head to show what he knew would be a dense knot of black lines the size of a coin, with a long swooping tail curving towards his ears.

“It’s going to draw some eyes, that’s for sure. No more hiding your weird rune work, now.” 

That was something Kaius had thought about, but he hated the idea of turning down a glyph simply because it would reveal a few oddities about him. Hopefully, it was a non issue — by the time they returned to society they should all be collectively strong enough that he wouldn’t have to worry about getting snatched up quite so easily as last time. While there was always a bigger fish, at some point open confrontation grew too costly, visible, and expensive as you got more powerful.

They were approaching that point rapidly. 

“I like it,” Kenva replied. “Almost looks like the tattoos of the coastal Hiwiann, but with a body formation bent.”

Kaius smiled about that, before he turned to Porkchop.

“What about you?”

Porkchop shrugged. “You look fierce. But you have always looked fierce, and I do not have the greatest sense of two-legged aesthetics. I know you like them, that is enough.”

Kaius gave his brother a friendly thump on the side, leaning in. 

As much as he was eager to jump right into picking his spells, he knew that Porkchop would want his opinion on his own skill, and that it would be rather rude to force his brother to wait patiently while he spent a quarter-hour in the depths of a spell vision.

After a small amount of polite refusal, Porkchop read through his options, before sharing them with the team. There were a few interesting abilities, but one major stand out that his brother thought would be a brilliant addition to his abilities  — something he agreed with.

Totem of the Glade. It would summon a pillar of carved jade for a significant cost of two-hundred mana and four-hundred stamina, which would provide significant enhancements to him and any ally within a certain distance of the totem — boosting all regeneration rates, as well as moderately improving their bodily toughness and base-line physical capabilities.

A fantastic addition, all things considered, though a conversation that left him itching to return to his own choices.

“Go on then, you look like you’re about to start clawing at the walls!” Porkchop eyed him with amusement.

Kaius grinned, immediately tearing open his available spells with a flicker of intent.

*Ding! Spell-hymn available for selection - Latent Glyph of Eirnith!*

Silent Speech:

Runic Hymn - Tier I (Psionic, Mental)

Affinity: Mind

Glyph: Eirnith

50 Mana

Selection Available!

This Hymn creates a link between two targets, allowing them to speak with mental communication for 30 minutes with a maximum distance of 100 longstrides. This link can be rejected. Distance and duration scale.

…

Mindspike:

Runic Hymn - Tier I (Psionic)

Affinity: Mind

Glyph: Eirnith

100 Mana

Selection Available!

This Hymn causes significant pain and mental distress to a chosen target for a duration of fifteen seconds, potentially rendering them insensate. Less effective on resistant and stronger opponents. Effects and duration scale.

…

Zone of Discombobulation:

Runic Hymn - Tier I (Psionic)

Affinity: Mind, Discord

Glyph: Eirnith

300 Mana

Selection Available!

This Hymn creates a circular zone of disorienting mind magic with a diameter of five longstrides that lasts for two minutes. Foes within the zone suffer confusion and disorientation that limits their ability to act effectively. Less effective on resistant and stronger opponents. Effects and duration scale.

…

Xien’s Quickened Thoughts:

Runic Hymn - Tier I (Mental, Senses)

Affinity: Mind, Primal

Glyph: Eirnith

150 Mana

Selection Available!

This Hymn quickens your thoughts and improves your senses, moderately slowing your perception of time for thirty seconds. Effects and duration scale.

Roving over the list, Kaius immediately discarded Silent Speech — it was of limited use to their team, considering that Porkchop could act as a message carrier. Besides, there were plenty of readily available artefacts that could be used to similar effect, and even if they were expensive, a whole spell slot was not something that money could buy.

The remainder were more interesting. One an enhancement that would make him even more of a terror in melee, and two that provided another avenue for disabling opponents.

On some level, both Mindspike and Zone of Discombobulation made him uncomfortable with their effects. Mind magic in general, really. He’d had far too many days sitting in a cell, feeling his stomach churn itself into knots as he wondered if this would be the day that a mindcracker would walk in to tear away his secrets and leave him a shattered shell of who he’d once been.

Even if neither of the spells seemed to be true ‘mind magic’ in the regulated sense, there was still something sour about the idea of reaching into someone's mind to play with their senses and self. 

He sighed.

Such thoughts were a luxury, and ultimately nothing more than the ghost of fear still haunting him. Ianmus had made it clear that mind magic and psionic spells went far beyond the narrow use cases of sundering people to their core and leaving them gibbering wrecks, and he knew his principles. Even if he was offered and took such a spell, he knew that he wouldn’t use it on thinking beings.

Right?

A shock of cold flushed down the back of his neck as his cheeks went clammy. Would he really restrain himself from such brutal magic? Even if it meant tearing the knowledge of who had been involved in his father’s death straight out of their mind?

Men like Old Yon, and the tracker who had hunted him and Father down…he didn’t feel much sympathy for them, nor any compunctions about spilling their life. What difference would it be if he learned what he had to first?

What good was obeying a law simply to protect the guilty — those who had already forfeit their lives?

He knew the stories of corruptible power. Those of heroes who took up hateful powers to do what they must, only to find themselves acting as they could when their compunctions and morals started to slip. 

But he was different, wasn’t he? He already possessed great power. Sure, there were people older and stronger than him, but if he was really a vile beast there was little the average Deadacre Baker could do to stop him if he wanted their life. Sure, he would face the consequences of such an action, but it wasn’t like those would be absent if he misused mind magic. Rotten roots! It wasn’t even the thought of the consequences that held him back from being a murderous bastard in the first place — he just wasn’t one.

But what of when there is no one else. Father had warned him of what could happen when the powerful grew too certain of their own righteousness.

The little voice in the back of his head was hard to rebuke. He was no fool. At his current rate of growth, with all of his Honours? Unless he died, or others rose, there would come a time when he was the peak. When the only thing that stood between him and the recreation of the horrors of the Empire was his own morals and ethics. 

As much as he didn’t want to think of himself as a hateful man, he could not stop himself from thinking of the searing anger that had surged through him during their escape — of the fragile crunch of bone as he had rammed the head of the vault guard into stone again and again. 

“Are you alright, Kaius? You look a little pale.” Ianmus chimed, pulling him from his thoughts.

He paused, but only for a moment. His team had earned his trust.

“Just… worried. There’s a couple of spells here that made me think of my aversion to mind magic. To use the more brutal of their spells on another thinking being is abhorrent, but what if I had them and I was faced with someone who might know of my father’s killers?”

Pressure grew as he clenched his fists and looked down at the sand, shame weighing him down. 

“I’m not sure if I would be able to stop myself. I don’t know what that says about me.” The words were whisper quiet as they slipped free of his tight jaw.

Silence spread, and his heart thumped. His brother was confused by his distress, that much was clear, and explainable by his cultural differences. But what of his friends? Were they disgusted by his callous disregard?

Kenva snorted, making him snap his eyes up.

“You’re a blasted idiot is what it says about you.” She shook her head. “Lame draught beasts and snapped axles, pull yourself together! Yes, I have seen you be a reckless and angry fool, but no more than can be excused for a man subject to torture for over a month — do you really think either myself or Ianmus would follow you if we thought you were a monster waiting to hatch?” 

“But—”

“But nothing. By the gods, you have a bloody greater beast in your head. They might be a tad more brutal than your average person, but few of them are cruel in the ways that men are.”

Kaius frowned. They didn’t get it! He wasn’t worried about who he was now but who he might be if he allowed himself to flirt with cruelty in such a fashion. It wasn’t just about the spell, but a yawning realisation that eventually there might not be anyone who could stop him.

A low growl cut off his thoughts before a heavy paw slammed into his shoulder and sent him sprawling face first into the sand.

Shocked at the sudden movement, Kaius rolled over to find his brother standing over him — teeth revealed and hackles up.

“No.”

“What the hells, Porkchop!” he said, pushing himself up. 

A single paw settled on his chest, backed by the immovable weight of a mountain.

“No. Stop doubting yourself. Do you fear Ianmus’s coming strength, when he might be able to erase a city in a single spell? Or what about Kenva? Do you worry for when all would have to fear a death that comes from a country away?”

The paw crushed him to the earth, frustration howling across his bond. Porkchop was looming now, his eyes piercing Kaius through the chest. 

“Or do you fear me? For the day I might grow so large and so strong that I might eat armies if I so wanted.”

Kaius looked away. 

“No.”

The frustration vanished, replaced by a well of patience. A claw slipped under his gambeson, yanking him upright before the warm weight of Porkchop’s arm pulled him close.

“Why not?”

“Because I don’t think any of you would do that!”

Porkchop chuffed in satisfaction, his chest resonating against Kaius’s back, and fell silent as if his response had explained everything. Big dumb bastard. Kaius leaned back and sighed, frustrated that he could feel his heart rate slowing.

Ianmus chuckled at the sight.

“Kaius, there is no harm in keeping an eye on your own behaviour, but this is a little silly. Take Old Yon — we’re going to kill him. Most likely with overwhelming violence and more than a little anger. Knowing your and Porkchop’s track record, there might even be a little bit of amputation involved. Why do you care if you scramble his brains a bit first, with a spell you don’t even have yet?” 

He paused to gather his words.” 

“It’s not so much the mind magic — I can recognise it’s not all that much different from any other form of strength. It’s just that I'm worried about turning into a tyrant, someone who uses people for their own ends.”

Kenva groaned across from him, running her hands through her hair.

“Had any burning urges to murder someone recently? And obviously we are going to exclude the people who tried to do it to us first.”

“No,” he replied sheepishly.

“What about extorting merchants for a better rate? Maybe punching a child because you wanted their sweets?”

“No!” Kaius exclaimed looking at her, horrified.

Kenva waved her hands in front of herself like she was revealing something grand.

“There’s your damn answer! You’re not a dick. Gods’ scorn, I know you’re undersocialised, but this is silly. Here’s the secret, all those ‘good’ people you hear about that turn into evil bastards the second they have enough power? They weren’t good in the first place. Yes, it is good to keep yourself in check, and to have codes of ethics and moral standards, but skewering yourself like this is pointless." 

He paused. But that was what Father had always said? That without careful attention, you could easily find yourself unrecognisable as you changed with power.

“They weren’t?”

“No!” his entire team yelled in unison.

Porkchop’s arm squeezed around him tighter, crushing him against his brother’s chest.

“If you’re that damn worried, I’ll just break your legs if I think you’re going too far. Now stop ruminating and tell us about this damn spell.”

Kaius smiled sheepishly, the threat of violence somehow making him feel a bit better. He supposed that with Porkchop at the bare minimum, he would never truly be alone at the peak — even if his friends were wrong, there would always be someone to hold him in check.

“I already mentioned it, but it’s called Zone of Discombobulation.”

A/N: def flagging this one with my editor when we reach B3 -- it's a much needed and sensible reaction, but Kaius is sitting at an 10 (straight up 12 before I tweaked the chapter) and I need him to simmer down to like an 8, the big ol drama queen.