A Precise Note Chapter 22 - Sparks

The fuck is happening?

When did Izuku become a fuck boy? 

Katsuki was still staring at his oldest, and, possibly, only, friend, who left with the girl, one of their new classmates, then came back minutes later, with her clinging on to him and acting all buddy-buddy lovey-dovey.

What the fuck? He mouthed, not able to understand it, or grasp it, or explain it. 

He never cared much for girls, but there was not caring for girls and there was watching a previously shy, dense-motherfucker start to go through them like he was devouring takeout in a mukbang livestream.

Counting the number of girls he was aware of, there was Suzume, whom Izuku outright told him he fucked, which was a surprise on its own. There was the other one, Saika? Some nerd girl who was famous, and Izuku said he went on dates with her. Then there was this chick, Shiozaki.

What the fuck?

Katsuki wasn’t jealous, of course. This had absolutely nothing to do with jealousy. It was pure annoyance. Irritation. Izuku was his rival, and therefore, someone he had to defeat, but if that rival got bogged down by too many hanger-on chicks, where would that leave him? What if he became like that legendary loser, the No. 1 Pro Hero before All Might, Captain Cel-something? What would that mean, competing with someone like that for first place?

Are you trying to be the Number 1 Pro Hero, or the Number 1 Pro Gigolo?

Katsuki wanted to punch something. He wanted to punch someone. He wanted to grab Izuku by the head and say, Open your fucking eyes and close your fucking legs, you whore.

This had nothing to do with jealousy. He didn’t give two flying fucks about girls, or chicks, or even register them in his worldview. On the road to number one, on the path to greatness, there could be little room for distractions. Back in Aldera, he could have had all the chicks he wanted, but he never wanted them, because he saw them for the bloodsucking parasitic leeches they were.

The Shiozaki chick was giving Izuku ‘come fuck me’ eyes, and Izuku was sitting there, making that constipated face he used to have when he started muttering under his breath. Only now he did it without the muttering because he finally quit that habit. He wasn’t even looking at the girl anymore, the same girl who’d gone from stranger to groupie in the course of the fucking twenty minutes they’d left the classroom.

What the fuck?!

This again, had absolutely positively nothing to do with jealousy.

The door swung open. A snappy, quick, bright yellow bolt of electricity shot through it. Some dumbass blond with spiky hair started moonwalking into the classroom. He spun around, and immediately gave everyone finger-guns.

“The most electrifying man in Hero Entertainment, Kaminari Denki, has arrived!"

Katsuki gave the guy, the dude with a clear and obvious electric quirk, a flat, almost irritated stare. Shiozaki didn’t register his presence, as her eyes had entered hunter-prey mode for Izuku. Fifth Place couldn’t be bothered to give the guy a second look.

“Oof. Tough crowd,” Sparkplug scratched the back of his head. “That usually gets the people going.”

Wait. Kaminari..?

His brain automatically provided numbers: Zero. Thirty-nine. Forty-nine. 

Sixth Place.

Katsuki rose and pointed. “You’re the bastard who got a fu— damned zero on the written exams?”

“Yup, that’s me!”

The boy winked and shot him a large grin.

“It was multiple choice,” Katsuki said, baffled. “How the hell do you get zero on a multiple choice exam?”

“I picked E for every answer.”

Katsuki let out a flat, “What.”

“Yeah, like what are the odds not a single question’s answer was E? That’s gotta be a statistical anomaly, man. I swear. The universe totally had it out for me.”

Everyone was staring at him now. Even Fifth Place was looking at Sparkplug with the same level of absolute ‘are you fucking kidding me?’ that Katsuki had burning in his soul. “Why would you do that?”

“Well, usually I’d pick C for every answer, but it got me thinking, there’s no way these guys don’t know that technique by now. They’d definitely be expecting it, so I had to outsmart them by picking a different letter. That way, they’d never see it coming.”

He tapped the side of his head with his index finger. 

“I thought I outsmarted the examiners, but I ended up outsmarting myself.”

No one said a word.

Izuku shook his head. “But why E’s?”

“All A’s would scream obvious. All B’s would be honey and all D’s would be nuts, so… I went all E’s. Rush E, you know?”

Everyone stared. 

Gently, Katsuki asked, “What the fuck is wrong with you?”

“Swear—” Izuku said, instinctively, before he stopped. “I’ll give you that one.”

The boy swung his blond hair back. “I know. It’s shocking, isn't it?" He gave them finger-guns again. “But now that I’ve stunned you all…”

He immediately turned his attention to Shiozaki. “What’s say we make like a transistor and amplify our feelings?” He took Shiozaki's hand into his, and kissed it lightly. “My friends call me Denki-sama, but you can call me—” 

“Never,” Shiozaki said immediately, withdrawing her hand. “I do not consort with philanderers."

Bullshit, Katsuki swore. 

Sparkplug held his chest in faux pain. “Are you a lightning rod? Because you just grounded my heart."

“Oi, Romeo!" Katsuki bit out. “You’re barking up the wrong tree there.”

“Huh?”

He snorted, shooting a glance at Izuku. “I’m saying your Juliet is in another castle.”

Sparkplug glanced at Izuku. Then he turned back to Shiozaki. A wide grin broke out on his face. 

“Oh, that’s how it is? I knew I could detect an alternating current running through here!”

He stared at Izuku for a moment before he tilted his head. 

“No, wait, it’s a direct current?”

The fuck are you talking about?

“Guess I’m waiting until more girls show up.” Sparkplug gave him a thumbs up. “Gotta go with the flow! The path of least resistance is how the Denki rolls! Thanks for the heads up, man!"

“That's not what I—"

"Soooo," Sparkplug slapped his hands together, not even letting him get a word in. A visible spark emerged from the action. “Anyone catch up with last night's episode of The Bachelorette: Hero Edition? Captain Celebrity still got a rose. Honestly, no one saw that coming.”

Izuku cleared his throat. “Kaminari-san, was it?"

“That's right,” Sparkplug said, pointing. “And you're Midoriya," He pointed again. “Bakugo, Shiozaki, and Shinso—"

Wait, I don’t remember telling you my fucking name.

Even Izuku was surprised. “You know our names?"

Sparkplug tapped his headphones. “They’re all over the waves, man. I can hear it… can’t stop hearing it."

Katsuki stared at the headphones the boy was wearing for the first time. They were those extra-thick ones that had dual functions of noise-cancelling, but also worked as typical headphones with auxiliary cord. The cord dangled from the side, not connected to anything, which meant Sparkplug wasn’t listening to anything, but even if he wasn’t—

How is he hearing us?

He didn’t have any issues hearing them despite those heavy headphones.

“I don’t quite understand, Kaminari-san.”

Katsuki snorted. “I don’t think you want to understand what’s going on up there…”

“Explanations give me a headache, man. I’m a man of action. Demonstrations are how we roll. Here, come on, how about I show you?” Sparkplug wagged a finger. “Try your best to give me a good ol’ knuckle sandwich."

Is he fucking serious?

Katsuki laughed as he hopped over the desk. “Being invited to punch someone's lights out on the first day? I'm already loving this place."

Sparkplug swaying left and right as if dancing to music, and Katsuki wound up his arm.

I’ll only use a little bit of strength, in case this idiot is all talk… just a straight punch should do it.

“A straight."

Katsuki’s back went slick with sweat. His voice came out hoarser than intended. “…what?"

“You were going to throw a straight with your left hand, right?"

The fuck? Is that a bluff? Is he bluffing? No, no way. A right, one jab, let’s see how he—

"Now you're thinking of a jab with your right."

Katsuki backed away; his heart roared in his chest. All the amusement left his face. All the color left his face.

That’s not fucking funny. That’s creepy as fuck. He can read minds? This joker can fucking read my mind?

“Oi. Spill it, bastard. How're you doing that?"

“So get this, my quirk is Electrification. It lets me charge, emit, and absorb electricity. Of course, Kami-sama decided to put a limiter on it cause I’d be too awesome otherwise. Limiter is in my noggin. If I use too much, I’d fry it.”

He tapped his forehead. 

“So, as a kid, I thought, hey, there's electricity in my brain, right? Why don't I just charge it up with as many volts as I can and make myself a galaxy-brain genius?"

That’s the fucking stupidest shit I’ve ever heard.

Izuku coughed loudly. “That isn't quite… how it works."

“Yeah, I learned that the hard way," Sparkplug admitted. “The doctors told me the brain isn’t meant to handle that much electricity. Nothing like hitting the snooze button for fifteen months straight to learn a lesson, am I right?"

The air in the room shifted. No one breathed. Katsuki backed away, slowly. Uneasily. A knot formed in his stomach. Sure, everyone had heard of cases of dumb kids doing dumb shit with their quirks that won them a no-expenses-paid extended vacation at the hospital. It wasn’t news anymore. Most people heard it, shrugged, and forgot about it the next day.

Meeting someone in person who had, in fact, fucked up that bad was rare.

“Fifteen months?" Izuku asked. “You were… in a coma, for over a year?"

“Wasn’t all that bad. I think the worst part of it was having to relearn stuff after the surgery. Words, math, history… ugh, it was torture. A T-shirt probably would have helped. Nothing like a ‘I almost made myself brain dead and all I got was this lousy T-shirt’ on a shirt to really make you feel like the effort was worth it, y’know?”

Sparkplug paused.

“Though my folks probably didn’t find it as funny as I did. Turns out medical bills and your only kid being in a coma really sucks all the life out of your marriage. But, hey, it is what it is, amiright?"

No one said anything.

“Come on, guys, almost killing yourself to gain powers is a core part of the superhero experience! It’s standard Hero 101. Think Lightning Speed Man. Who would he be without that lightning bolt that hit him? Right? Am I right or am I right?” 

The joke didn’t do jack for the silence. Out of the corner of his eye, Katsuki saw Izuku’s eyes shift with something uncomfortable.

“Geez, tough crowd. You guys aren't getting invited to any house parties I throw, that's for sure. And I throw the best house parties. It kind of helps when you've got two houses."

“None of that explains how you knew our names, or how you can tell what way I'm about to punch you."

“A transcranial magnetic stimulation was one of the medical ops I got. Also, they uh… kinda hacked away at some parts of my brain that were too far gone. Did you know you can technically live with only one half of your brain?"

“It wouldn’t be a fucking surprise…” Katsuki mumbled.

“Anyway, overloading my brain didn't give me a galaxy brain, it probably made me peabrained, but!" Sparkplug pointed at everyone. “Gains, baby! We only look at the gains! And I did get some gains! Electric currents, and some stuff on the electromagnetic spectrum like radio waves… I kinda pick 'em out and tune 'em a bit."

“I thought I was going crazy because I kept waking up to someone saying, ‘GOOD MORNING HOSU CITY!’” he chuckled. “Man, that was a treat. Compared to radio waves, though, brainwaves are really low frequency."

Fifth Place almost jumped to his feet. “So you can read… minds?"

“What? No, no-nononono," Sparkplug crossed his arms over his chest. “Reading? We don’t do that here. I just listen. It’s kinda like… trying to finetune a radio and connect to the right channel. Most of the time, it's just dead air. But! On occasion, you manage to hit that sweet spot and make out words from it before it goes back to static."

Sparkplug pointed at him. 

“Weird thing is, the static gets super clear when someone's directly facing me and ten times clearer when they make eye contact. So, all I gotta do is look in your eyes a bit… and I can kinda hear bits and pieces…"

Wait. If that’s what he’s doing…

"I wanna test something out." Katsuki smacked his fist again. “Let's see you try this time."

Left straight.

"Um… okay?" Sparkplug tilted his head. “You're going for a lef—"

Katsuki’s right fist blurred forward. Denki's hand shot up immediately, catching the fist before it reached his face. Sparkplug blinked in surprise. Katsuki lifted an eyebrow.

The fuck are those reflexes?

“Huh."

“Yeah, I don’t give a shit what you call it. You are reading my thoughts. But you’re only reading the shit that’s on the surface.  If someone is capable of thinking something on the surface and doing something else entirely, you'd be caught with your pants down."

“Oh," Sparkplug said. “Oh. Ohhhh. That's — that's awesome! I didn't know that!"

“It also means it won’t work on people with aphantasia,” Izuku said. “Or anauralia. I wouldn’t recommend relying on it, Kaminari-san.”

“Apha-what now? Ana-who now?”

“Aphantasia. It’s the inability to visualize images. People who can’t imagine a ‘red apple’ in their minds. It’s just blank for them,” Izuku explained. “Anauralia is the same thing, but for auditory images. They can’t imagine music, or sounds, or notes, or possess an inner voice.”

“Woah, woah, hold the phone. You’re saying there’s people out there who don’t… have anything going on in their heads? Like… no voice telling them ‘don’t lick dust’ and ‘don’t talk about boobies in front of the teacher?’ It’s just… silence? Nothing?”

Izuku’s eyes got a shine in them that Katsuki just knew meant he was about to go down another nerd-shit rabbit hole.

“It’s very fascinating. Studies have been conducted questioning the effects of aphantasia on general life experience and—”

“Midoriya, my man, you lost me at studies.”

Katsuki grinned. You know what… this guy isn’t half bad.

Anyone who could share in his disinterest of Izuku’s constant nerd-babble was, in Katsuki’s opinion, someone he would get along with just fine.

The classroom door opened once more. This time, a girl stepped in. At least Katsuki thought it was a girl, because there was nothing to see except a set of floating clothes. The shape looked close-enough to be a girl, and there was a skirt, shoes, socks, and the full she-bang, but it could just as well have been a cross-dressing guy as far as Katsuki could tell.

“Hallo! It’s me! Toru! Is it the right class? Excited!”

“Oh, ho, there’s something you don’t see every day,” Sparkplug chimed.

He began moonwalking, again, and Katsuki proceeded to mentally take back everything he said about getting along with him.

“I’m Kaminari Denki, and you’re—”

“Midoriya-kun! You’re already here!”

There was a collective snapping of necks. Everyone from Shiozaki, to Sparkplug, to Fifth Place turned towards Izuku. Izuku blinked and smiled and waved.

“Hey there, Toru-san.”

Katsuki glanced from Invisi-girl to Izuku, and from Izuku back to Invisi-girl, and then from Invisi-girl to Shiozaki, and from Shiozaki to Izuku.

“Izuku, you're a fucking whore.”