It’s Okay to Want a Parent’s Love
Added 2024-03-09 20:49:52 +0000 UTCI need a daddy. And by that I mean, I need an older male figure who loves me fiercely, has no desire for me physically and literally just wants me to be safe and happy. I don’t like no whips and chains, I just want a dad.
I used to be very adamant that I didn’t need a father. And now I’m coming to realise whether I needed one or not, I really badly wanted one. I still do. I’m never going to have a father, but I do think there’s healing in being honest about not getting want you want. It’s human to want and it’s human to grieve over not getting what you want.
Comments
To anyone that needs it *best dad voice* "Hey, I am proud of you and what you have become and all you have overcome"
TheRavenKing
2024-03-15 03:51:58 +0000 UTCI need one too, had one until I was 16 then poof no dad.
Funflame
2024-03-13 12:12:20 +0000 UTCSure. Lmk
The Keys
2024-03-13 07:44:28 +0000 UTCThis has "I don't want to be horny, I just want to be happy" energy and I'm all for it. I miss falling asleep watching movies and cuddling more than the sex, and the sex was great. We just need a pack. Be well.
Mister Wulfe
2024-03-11 14:30:43 +0000 UTCThanks Tea for dropping some wisdom that I didn’t know I needed. Not only do you create fantastic audios, you make posts that make us think and heal ourselves. Thank you so much. You’re doing great! ❤️
Durni Kolin
2024-03-11 13:46:07 +0000 UTCThis one definitely hit close for me. I feel that 'hole' in one's heart. :Hugs:
Awkward Space Man
2024-03-11 10:44:58 +0000 UTCI normally don't comment but this strikes a nerve. I'm a dad and husband, have been for a long time, and consider myself supremely blessed on both fronts. For whatever it's worth, what you've experienced is completely unfathomable for 99.9% of parents, not just dads. For as much time as you may have sat and wondered 'what did I do wrong', I understand it's natural for a child to feel that way but please believe me it's not you. I'm sure you can academically know this, but it doesn't diminish the hurt of being deprived of something so basic or the confusion of trying to find the reasons why. The things my kids do sometimes make me want to rip my hair out and move permanently to Antarctica, but I am here for them. Always. They will always be my people, and my wife and I will welcome them home without fail. We will love them and guide them throughout their adulthood just as we did when they were babies. They will always be our babies. That will never shut off. There is no parenting finish line. The pain you've endured/are enduring is unfair. You and any other child that has experienced similar transgressions deserve better. EVERYONE deserves to stay warm in the embrace of parental love and the opportunity to feel comfortable knowing there's someone or someones that they can always be safe with whether they are 3 or 33. You've been deprived of that on so, so many levels and it's not your fault. You've come out from this doing well by yourself but it's unfair that you might feel like the only person you can count on is you. You are not broken or flawed. You are a human responding to the trauma you never asked for. We all need our support. I'm not a perfect parent, my wife is not perfect (she's a helluva lot closer to perfect than me), but we'll always and forever take care of our kids in the best way we know. We are not friends or personally acquainted. But you should be proud of the things you've accomplished. You're alive, aware, greatly articulate and pull great art out of that brain and soul of yours. Any even halfway normal parents would be proud to call you their daughter, Tea. Respectfully, a dad.
Craig
2024-03-10 17:29:12 +0000 UTCWell, Tea, I got story for You so sit back and relax because this one is a bit on a longer side. About a year ago I've met a person on line. Started as loose talks via YT comments then moved to one of the popular communicators. No romantic or erotic undertones, just "how was your day", "how are you feeling", "what'cha doing", stuff like that. As friendship developed, it became apparent that this person is in need of emotional support. Of someone to talk to. To get advice in general, just from different point of view so I became crossbreed between advisor, kinda moral compass (bad choice, I know) and emotional support person, akin to a parent figure. It became even stronger when we realized that age difference between us is quite similar to a parent vs child and the person in question triggers all the protective instincts I have. To my surprise, at some point, I was asked directly if I was ok with being called "dad". Not "daddy, yamete kudasai". Just dad. Since my relationship with my father is absolutely great, receiving such title from someone not of my blood was shocking. Shocking that someone can be this deeply scarred by their biological parents to seek parental figure outside of their bloodline and that I could earn that much of a trust from someone outside of the family. Great honor for me but also great responsibility. So, for several months now I'm virtual dad, giving advice, reassuring whenever necessary, supporting mentally and guiding as best as I can while not being physically present. I don't think I'm anyone special, just a regular dude, so there must be more like me and so - I strongly believe that given a bit of luck You'll find someone who would gladly play this role for You. Stay strong, stay positive and.... don't loose hope.
Verid
2024-03-10 13:09:37 +0000 UTCYou want a Giles (Buffy). We should all have a Giles!
Gabriel
2024-03-10 11:00:27 +0000 UTCI know the flip side of this. I wanted to be a dad with a wife and a kid. An outsider took that from me and hurt her emotionally and psychologically in the process. The upshot is her son, my boy, is a stand-up guy who calls me "Pops" even though she and I never got together.
Mike Taylor
2024-03-10 05:12:46 +0000 UTC💜💜💜💜💯💯💯✅✅✅💪💪💪👍👍👍💜💜💜💜
Lost Puppy
2024-03-10 05:00:38 +0000 UTCAs a stepfather, this plucked that string that made me really want to just hug you and tell you that it’s fine and you’ll be okay…
Jack Smith
2024-03-10 04:32:59 +0000 UTCThat's very sweet. It's also possible. Sadly, it wouldn't be easy.
rubynall
2024-03-10 02:27:37 +0000 UTCHave mine.
CurrentlyEatingPies
2024-03-10 01:43:18 +0000 UTCI am happy you came to this conclusion, and I am even more sad you don't have that in your life. I hope you find someone like that, and hey, if experience helps, small towns are great to be adopted by random old people (I got a table out of that for no reason, I wanted to buy it, but he wouldn't let me) I hope the small story made you smile.
Micado02
2024-03-09 23:44:15 +0000 UTCEveryone wants someone who will act as a mentor, guardian and father. For older generations, they turned to religion. For younger people now, they don’t even get the father they’re related to. Tea, I hope you do find someone who will love and support you as a father should. Because when that happens, you’ll be enriching two lives instead of just one. ❤️
Steve
2024-03-09 23:14:11 +0000 UTCAin't no way you used Jack Harlow!!!😂😂😂 As you can see I am NOT a father figure 😅😅😅
Toshiro Valiant
2024-03-09 22:36:49 +0000 UTCYou truly are an amazing human because your wisdom passed down to us and this is no different. We all need parental figures, whether it comes from teachers, sports coaches or other family members or even parents from close friends. It’s a beautiful tragic feeling when we have that missing piece of our lives. Parental figures give us love and wisdom to guide us in life.
Camilo Iribarren
2024-03-09 22:33:10 +0000 UTCMy own father wasn't necessarily bad, but he was rather emotionally detached. Still is. I've always been a very emotionally-connected (emotional in my younger years) and empathetic person, in contrast. Shortly after my ex and I had our daughter, we mutually agreed to an open relationship with a close work friend of mine. They were non-binary AFAB and a very open-minded individual. They told me both before and after that physically connected relationship that (saying this to note that their feelings about how they perceived me/how I perceive them were not sexually connected) I was the first man they felt they truly loved. Not a partnership love. Not a sexual love. Closer to a familial love. They mentioned that I was the first father-like figure to show them care and acceptance. They told me they felt they had a home with me, detached from a physical residence. To know that I could be that sort of person outside of just raising my daughter was incredibly eye-opening to me. To more than just whoever my future partner may be, I've a new goal to be that same sort of role in other people's lives. To be the role I didn't get from my own father. To be a home and place of comfort for my loved ones. I genuinely believe that is something that everyone deserves to have in their life.
Rix
2024-03-09 22:18:08 +0000 UTCThanks, I survived... in trauma therapy
TheRavenKing
2024-03-09 22:11:19 +0000 UTCI go through the same thing. My biological dad was a miserable and disgusting person. But ever since I met my girlfriend's dad, he's given me a ton of dad love I never thought I'd experience. He even scolds me if I haven't eaten or if he finds out I haven't taken my meds on time 😆. He's just as caring as my girlfriend
peanutbutterxxx
2024-03-09 22:03:00 +0000 UTCI’m so sorry.
TeacupAudio
2024-03-09 21:50:40 +0000 UTCThere's nothing wrong with that, I'm sure you'll find a Father like figure. I used to wonder why my Dad wasn't around until I found out the hard way when he visited us when I was almost 11, while he said he was sorry for attacking my Mom and older half brother it completely changed how I viewed him.
Jeremy Knight
2024-03-09 21:43:46 +0000 UTCThis is completely understandable Tea. We all want parental figures to love and help us when needed.
Phoenix Brave Hideki
2024-03-09 21:41:37 +0000 UTCI can undertand that feeling. by blood he's my dad, but I've never considered him to be. man's straight up told me he regrets having kids. My uncles stepped up for that role and I love them for it. They taught me things I should learned growing up, provided a me an environment where I felt safe. They were strict at times, but they never belittled my existence like my "dad" did and continues to.
Jub
2024-03-09 21:24:57 +0000 UTC1000% agree. I actually got that parental love recently from some soon-to-be in-laws, and I remember thinking, "Oh. So that's what it's supposed to feel like."
Blindluck92
2024-03-09 21:20:04 +0000 UTCI hope to be like Lucifer (weird to say) from Hazbin Hotel someday. The unconditional support always ready to help kind of person
Eric
2024-03-09 21:15:43 +0000 UTCabuse is hard to shake off even if possible. Still I think for the heavy burden it levies you do your damnedest to make sure it doesn't happen to others. That's how I try to fold it into my framework at least. I think your audios and open nature to speak about it, make the conversation easier to have so others don't suffer in silence
NightofTwilight
2024-03-09 21:12:04 +0000 UTCI was very much abused by my mother
TheRavenKing
2024-03-09 21:09:30 +0000 UTCAre we all just the same sad little child? I think we might be. I feel seen 🫡❤️
TeacupAudio
2024-03-09 21:08:23 +0000 UTCI really wish I could have lent you my grandfather Tea… He was my best friend and a bastion of safety to not only me but to my mom and her two sisters… He could always cheer you up when you where at your lowest and he always made sure you felt loved… Everyday I am thankful that I got have a person like that in my life… And like I said, I wish I could get him back so that other people could have that too…❤️
Rasmus
2024-03-09 21:07:37 +0000 UTCOh no. I made a myself and a stranger sad. Sorry. Reflexes die hard 😭
TeacupAudio
2024-03-09 21:06:42 +0000 UTCI know that feeling all to well Tea.
Jmann1892
2024-03-09 21:06:24 +0000 UTCterrified that you had to preface "has no desire for me physically"
NightofTwilight
2024-03-09 21:04:35 +0000 UTCI’m kinda this way but in needing a motherly figure that doesn’t constantly berate me and question every decision I make ;w;.
Kamp Ridgaway
2024-03-09 20:57:46 +0000 UTCI need a non sexual mommy
TheRavenKing
2024-03-09 20:57:16 +0000 UTCIt's okay, but not for me. At least that's been my case.
MadArtist
2024-03-09 20:57:02 +0000 UTCGOOD parental figures..
Little Lupo
2024-03-09 20:55:23 +0000 UTCThis Guy Offered "Free Dad Hugs" At A Pride Parade And People Really Needed Them https://www.buzzfeednews.com/article/laurenstrapagiel/free-dad-hugs-pride
Michael Garrett
2024-03-09 20:55:11 +0000 UTCHey that’s the natural desire for all boys and girls, far after being an adult, still maintaining connections with parental figures is a blessing and a half. For whatever and however you’re going through it. Truly. I hope someone out there is rooting enough for you that the connection is made.
Little Lupo
2024-03-09 20:54:42 +0000 UTCThe anniversary of my dad’s passing was recently. He died when I was really little. I never had a real single father figure since then. I also told myself I don’t need one, but I can’t help but wonder if I’d be better off now if I had had one.
Latefordinner
2024-03-09 20:54:30 +0000 UTC🖤
June
2024-03-09 20:52:05 +0000 UTC
