03/01/2021 Update: Patron Rewards and Mental Status

Hey guys, as I said before the Patron Rewards for this month are going to be a bit late due to working on commissions, daily errands, work, and watching my nephew. Just today I had to pay for my mailbox, get documentations from work, drop off and make a payment for my dad's car loan, and other adulting stuff. Also going through some emotional and mental health issues at the moment, but I'll be get into that.

 I will try and get these pieces done as soon as I can. chances are by today or tomorrow. I will get this done because you guys are so wonderful, patient and without you none of this work would be worth it or possible. 

Now for the emotional and mental health part, lately I have not felt all that stable the past few days. I don't wanna overshare because I feel like that would be inappropriate even though I've done it before. I rather not make you guys worry more. 

To make it simple, yet again I feel like I'm being taken for granted in my own home, no one seems to be considerate of me and my feelings even if I go out of my way for my family. I feel like when I'm justifiably hurt, angry, or sad everyone just views it as me over reacting. It's kind of typical of Filipino families and very toxic. If you raise your voice it's considered "disrespectful" even if you are the one in the right. It's nothing new but it's been more annoying than normal. And it's hard to talk to anyone when everyone is busy at work or asleep. I feel like I'm everyone's nanny or maid half the time. I would like to share details but I think I've said too much already in this regard. 

Then there's dealing with social circles involving people who have the same views as I do, sort of, and seeing how self-destructive and detrimental they are being. I normally don't tone police, I don't like the "hurting your own cause" argument,  and I disapprove of centrism very very much, but something my fellow Leftists can be very very exhausting. I have very little patience for impractical stupidity. Discourse and nuance discussion on serious topics is a very difficult web to navigate, but there comes a time where I can't take it. Obviously I understand why my friends and colleagues are like this, I greatly sympathize. We all want greater change. But the stupidity and lack of rational was just too much for me.

However, both situations that caused me mental and emotional distress I broke down and cried. I felt like lashing out and blocking certain people, even my friends but I'm smarter and more rational than that. 

But in addition to errands and my mental health it's kind of hard to complete these pieces but I have to power through it for you guys. I'll recover from this and try to stay collected, I promise. You guys support my work and I need t make good on my promise.

I'm sorry this was longer than intended and thanks for your time guys. 

Love ya'll <3