Ch 104 - I Get a Pep Talk From a Donut Consultant

“What class choices did you get?” Jane asked. She was still bloody, the back of her armor wrecked, but Ruby had healed her up good. While Tomas and Scott both checked their class choices, I deactivated the spells on Switchblade and banished the bike to finish repairing.

All of Steve’s 6 remaining clones said in unison, “I’ll scout the area.”

I hadn’t even noticed the other 4 get killed.

“Only 6?” Ruby asked.

“The fewer I summon, the more tangible they become and the more independently they can work. If I limit it to just 1, he’s basically a doppleganger of me. Fully physical and independent. Even better, if I have clones out and take damage, it gets reflected to them first.”

That was super cool. All 6 clones winked at Ruby, then scattered, crossing the field in different directions before disappearing into the trees.

Steve sat in the grass and closed his eyes. “I can use their senses, but it’s still weird having 7 pairs of eyes. I’m going to practice. Let me know if there’s any cool loot. I’ll tell you if I spot any danger.”

“Good work.” As much as Steve liked to joke and tease and pretend to be a goofball, he was proving more resourceful than I gave him credit for. He seemed to be putting together a really boss build.

We looted the bunnies and got a few mana crystals, buckets of rabbit stew, and 2 dozen rabbit feet. Back on Earth, those were usually considered lucky. These were different.

“Explosive Decoy Hare. When placed on the ground and activated, each rabbit foot will create a lifelike decoy of whoever triggered it. When any physical force touches it, the decoy will explode.”

“Exploding decoys are appropriate and awesome,” Jane said, but then went back to discussing class choices with Tomas.

We split the loot, although I let the others keep the mana crystals. There weren’t enough to make a difference for me. I got 5 gallons of rabbit stew, but I wasn’t sure I would eat it. My grandmother had made excellent rabbit stew, but the memories of all those bunnies self destructing soured my stomach. I happily took 3 of the decoys though.

Before Tomas and Scott could unlock classes, they had to make their second permanent spell choice. Tomas’s build was turning out very interesting. In addition to his permanent teleport spell, he also had cool abilities that included stealth, an increased agility and acrobatics ability called Daredevil, and Steel Thumb, the ability to fabricate or repair machines. He hadn’t used that last one much, but it offered a lot of potential.

He only had one temporary spell at the moment, the recently-acquired MacGyver spell. Even though he hadn’t used it yet, Tomas made that permanent.

Scott permed a spell he’d just bought at the system store. He’d spent pretty much his entire mana crystal stash on it, and it seemed a perfect fit. It allowed him to designate a small area during a fight. As long as he stayed within that area, it would dramatically reduce the mana cost of his laser beam.

He’d been a stunt man back on Earth like Burns, and with his natural strength and physical abilities, I was surprised he didn’t focus more on some kind of pure warrior build. Instead, he seemed to be focusing all-in on his ocular beam power.

“Hey, I can change my stats around now,” Scott exclaimed.

I’d forgotten about that option, honestly. With my build combining both magic and combat, I needed all my stats pretty balanced.

“What are you thinking of changing?” Lana asked, dropping to one knee beside where he sat on the grass.

“I need more mana so I can fire my eye beam more. That means more Intelligence. I’m going to pull some from all of my other stats to supercharge it.”

“Cool,” Lana said.

Ruby didn’t look so thrilled. I shared her concern. “Um, Scott, it’s totally your choice, but do you think it’s wise to cut back on Constitution when we’re heading into a dungeon?” Constitution fueled our Life Points, after all.

He shrugged. “If I can deal more damage faster, then chances of getting hit are lower. Besides, I’ve got you tanks to get up close and personal. I’ll fill Constitution back in as I get my next few levels.”

“Okay, as long as you understand the risks.”

“I think the risks are manageable. It’s a trade-off that should work while we’re in this big group,” he said confidently.

It was ultimately his choice, and he was probably right. As long as he stayed behind us, he should be fine. The ability to fire more of those super-powered ocular beams would definitely help.

Both he and Tomas got some cool class choices, although far fewer than I’d gotten. With input from the rest of us, they quickly narrowed down the list and made their choices. Tomas chose Scrap-heap Surgeon.

“Scrap-heap Surgeon. Master of flexibility and creativity, the Scrap-heap Surgeon finds solutions in the moment to tackle any problem. Gain the level 4 ability Creative Frenzy.”

“Creative Frenzy. In 1 second of real time, you slow time for 2 minutes per level to build the perfect construct to solve your problem or defeat your enemy.”

“That’s sweet,” I told him when he explained it to me.

“I know. I can’t wait to try it.”

It came with some cool class spells. One gave him multiple choice options for looting monsters, another restored items, weapons, or gear damaged or destroyed during a fight, and the third improved his ability to quickly build defensive constructs from nearby junk and materials he summoned.

He instantly tried the repair spell on Jane’s armor and it worked flawlessly. She grinned. “That’ll save a bunch of mana crystals repairing our gear all the time.”

“I’m surprised you didn’t choose a healer class,” I said after reviewing his choice. It was really unique, and he seemed super excited about it, but he’d been an actual surgeon back on Earth.

Tomas exchanged a look with Jane and took her hand. “We actually talked about that a lot. I’m a good doctor, but here we’ve got healing potions and stuff. Don’t need highly trained doctors as much. The best way to protect people here and back on Earth is to get strong enough to defeat that Queen Marisara final boss.”

He clapped me on the shoulder and grinned. “I don’t want you to have to keep fighting alone.”

Jane flashed a smile, her eyes glowing with her Phoenix powers. “We all plan to catch up so we can keep up.”

For a moment, I didn’t know what to say. I swallowed back sudden emotion and pulled them both into a hug. That said it all. Ruby stepped in close and placed a hand on my shoulder. “We’re a team.”

Steve looked up from where he still sat in the grass. “Well team, we’ve got a horde of mandrill apes charging in from the north. Looks like we get another chance to gain some experience.”

“How many?” Ruby exclaimed at the same time Lana cried, “Apes?”

Jane just said, “Hurry, Scott.”

The black-haired stunt man grinned. “Done. New class is Sunspot Spammer.”

He explained quickly. The new class was hyper-focused on maximizing his ocular beam power while reducing mana drain. Perfectly fit the build he wanted.

Just in time because a tide of giant mandrill apes boiled out of the trees, some soaring 20 feet before landing. All 50 of them galloped straight at us, grunting and growling in surprisingly deep voices. They were as big as silverback gorillas, but clearly Mandrills.

Even Earth Mandrills always looked weird to me, with their red-and-blue striped skin on their long snouts and the ugliest butts of any animal in the world. It looked like someone shaved their backside, then splashed red and blue paint over the exposed skin.

These had the same unfortunate coloring as Earth mandrills, but also had arms that bulged with oversized muscles and five-fingered hands the size of cookie sheets. Identify kicked in as soon as I focused on the first one.

“Graveclutch Mandrill. Level 31. Uncommon. Berserk. These fierce monkeys could crush your skull with their powerful jaws, but they prefer a more hands-on approach. When their oversized hands lock on to a target, they fuse around it and will not come off until the prey or the mandrill is dead. They exert steadily increasing crushing force that builds by draining life force from the target until they shatter bones and rip their prey to pieces.”

“Do not let them grab you!” I shouted. Then I charged to meet the onrushing horde, Echo and Scalebiter in my hands. My ranged options weren’t great, and I refused to let those monsters close on my team.

The charging horde of giant monkeys looked impressive, but their tactics would have worked better on a team with fewer ranged attacks. Scott’s eye beam blasted past me, his new class powers on full display. The beam was so hot, it warped the air before slicing through half a dozen of the apes in a single hit.

At the same time, exploding crossbow bolts from Lana rained destruction across the charging mandrills while Steve again split into a squad of clones who all unleashed elemental destruction in unison. Ice arrows froze monster limbs while burning arrows set more of them on fire, sending them into a panicked frenzy. Two molotovs hit in the middle of the group to fantastic results.

Andy raced toward the horde right behind me, swords in hand, while Tomas appeared by my side and kept pace.

Hot on our heels, Jane shouted, “Is there a plan, or are we just rushing in?”

I had actually just planned to rush in. I was good up close and personal, but now with part of the team running into the literal jaws of danger, I hesitated. I wanted to tell them to back off, but that’s not how we all leveled.

“Hang back, Jane. Use your telekinesis to keep them off of any of us who gets into trouble.”

With his quick teleport ability, Tomas should be fine. I didn’t know enough about Andy’s skills. He was carrying a longsword and a shortsword, with another gigantic sword strapped to his back. His short, brown hair was covered in a steel pot-like helmet now, and he grinned, looking eager for the fight.

He saw me glance over and grinned. “Don’t worry about me boss-man.”

“Okay. Hit them hard and fast and don’t get swarmed.”

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We closed on the monsters fast, but a final wave of arrows and bolts and another fire beam tore into the front ranks of monsters, making enough holes so we wouldn’t get instantly swarmed.

I plunged into the fray, drawing deep on my Agility as I spun and twisted among the monsters, dodging grasping, oversized hands and biting maws with 6-inch fangs that could probably shear through plate armor.

My blades became a blur of slashing silver and black, every movement targeting a monster’s vulnerable spot. I aimed for necks and joints, and the monster hide proved insufficient to slow my deadly blades. Blood geysered from opened arteries and mandrills roared in pain as I sliced elbows, shoulders, and knees or severed giant hands at the wrist.

The stench of blood mixing with the monsters’ dense musky stench clogged my nostrils, and my ears rang with shouts and howls. The apes swarmed in around us, a jumble of leaping monsters and grasping hands.

I still couldn’t activate Phantom Step, but since I’d acted like the tip of the spear, I’d pushed in too far and 4 of the beasts converged on me at the same time. This was going to hurt.

Then they all rebounded off of an invisible barrier. Thank you, Jane!

I dove through a gap, slashing 2 of the monsters as I passed. The barrier broke as I passed through, but the leaping monsters missed by inches. I quickly dispatched them before they could surround me again. As I fought, I caught sight of my team.

Tomas was blinking back and forth among the monsters even faster than he had against the bunnies, and all of a sudden, a clumsy looking contraption of wood and steel appeared behind him. It stood on 5 leg spikes that stuck deep into the soft ground, and had 4 multi-segmented arms capped with zombie shackles. The central trunk was made out of a literal tree trunk 3 feet thick that spun 360 degrees.

The construct latched onto monsters lunging at Tomas, the shackles snapping around their wrists. Then each arm spun, trying to flip the monsters over.

Earth apes were terrifyingly strong, and these monsters were way stronger than any silverback gorilla. They wrestled the construct, bending the limbs. One ripped totally free. That still wasted precious seconds and Tomas blinked in around the shackled apes and quickly finished off the distracted monsters with well-placed slashes.

Farther back from the fight, Jane was gesturing with both hands. Each time she did, one of the monsters would stumble or recoil. A couple times she aimed at leaping monsters, hitting the mandrills in the air and tossing them into other monsters. One of the Graveclutch Mandrills leaped high into the air, aimed straight at her.

It struck an invisible barrier and bounced off. Before it could even hit the ground, an unseen force struck it like a tornado of razor blades. Fur and muscle and blood fountained all around the monster. Whatever spell she’d used scoured it down to a chunk of bloody meat that rained down over the grass.

Yikes. That sight distracted me so badly, I missed a dodge and one of the apes seized my bicep in one oversized hand. The giant paw sealed around my arm and squeezed with crushing force.

I grunted but still slashed its other arm before it could grab me with that one too. Echo caught it just inside the elbow, mostly severing that limb. The mandrill roared in my face and tried to bite my head off.

I stabbed Echo through its open mouth and out the back of its head. The monster froze, held in place by my blade. I growled when I realized even Soul Feed’s passive energy drain wasn’t working with my mana pool disabled. Instead, the monster started draining some of my health and its grip continued to tighten.

Snarling, I heaved it around, using the leverage of my sword sticking through its face and its own grip on my arm to slam it into another Graveclutch Mandrill trying to hit me from the side. Then I yanked Echo free and used it to sever the giant hand still gripping me.

The dying monster staggered back, its paw still wrapped around my bicep. Another monster charged in straight at me and leaped, both arms extending to seize me.

I threw both blades back into my inventory and mentally slammed down on a mana potion in my hotlist. Then I lunged inside its grasping claws and triggered my new temporary spell.

“Upper Cut. Spell. Double the physical damage of an uppercut punch and unleash 4 ethereal claws from the back of your hand.”

I threw every bit of strength into the upper cut and caught the snarling Graveclutch Mandrill under its open jaw. A surge of power blasted out my hand as my spell doubled the power of an already-overpowered hit. The punch smashed its jaw and snapped its head back. The rest of its body followed, its forward momentum changing into a full-body backflip.

Four ethereal blades extended from the back of my hand. I hadn’t understood the placement of the blades until that second. The blades extending from the back of my hand punched through the monster’s skull and neck, and as it backflipped, I dragged those blades down its entire torso.

Awesome. So I triggered another mana potion and spun to meet yet another mandrill barreling in from the other side. I lashed out with a fist, triggering my other available temporary spell.

“Sapper Charge. Spell. Deliver a concussive bare-handed strike that disrupts an enemy's spirit, dealing massive spiritual damage. Disrupt any of their active spells or spell casting, and negate most mental and magical defenses.”

The monster caught me around the waist with both of its oversized hands, fusing them together all the way around my torso. Half a heartbeat later, I punched it in the center of the chest with all my strength.

The mandrill’s entire chest rippled like my fist was striking the surface of a pond. Its eyes flew wide and its limbs went limp. Even its hands fell away from my torso as it plopped to the ground, making a pathetic whimpering sound.

I called forth my blades and slashed its neck before dropping and rolling under another mandrill diving at me. One of Steve’s ice arrows caught it mid-jump and froze its spine so that when it landed, its back shattered and it fell dead.

I spun, swords up, just in time to see Tomas appear above the last mandrill and cleave his sword through its skull before landing on it and driving it to the ground.

The area was a nasty scene of blood and gore and dead mandrills. Jane waved, looking untouched, while Andy limped over to pick up a fallen sword. One of his arms dangled useless by his side and his face was covered in blood.

He raised his good hand in victory, then grimaced and fainted. Just as he hit the ground, a golden chain snicked across the field, wrapped around his head, then yanked the limp fighter back to the others.

“Sorry! I was aiming for your chest,” Ruby exclaimed as her chain deposited Andy at her feet. She immediately poured a potion into the groggy man’s mouth.

Tomas appeared next to me, sweaty and tired. He tried a couple times to sheath his sword, then gave up and banished it back into his inventory. I clapped him on the shoulder.

“Good work. That teleport spell is awesome.”

“Right? It’s called Flash Step. When I got it, I didn’t realize just how awesome it was. I can only teleport up to 50 yards per spell level.”

“I helped him figure it out,” Jane said as she joined us and swept Tomas right off his feet in a bear hug before kissing him long and hard.

We triggered Loot and I barely resisted the urge to trigger Soul Feed to top off my health. Luckily I’d dealt enough damage that my Tesla Coil bracelet kept up.

I still had tons of health potions, but using Soul Feed had become such an integral part of my fighting style, it rankled deep that I couldn’t use it right now. Delving into a dungeon without it might not be the wisest choice I’d made, but I pushed that worry aside. We’d be fine.

On top of Soul Feed not being available, I couldn’t try Harvest either. Still, I liked the 2 harvested spells I had. As I scanned my status, I noticed a tiny orange power bar below my health and mana. It read “Captured magical charge.”

Huh. I hadn’t even noticed when I’d gotten that. Magical Resistance absorbed 30% of magical attacks. It must have come from the mandrills. Either when they grabbed me with their magical grips, or when they tried draining my health to fuel their crushing force. The charge was small, but should be enough to trigger Phantom Step at least once. Finally!

We got a lot more mana crystals from the apes, along with fangs that could be crafted into daggers with life drain effects, and rolls of leather colored bright red and blue. No buffs, just cool color combos. We also each got half a dozen potions of Iron Grip that made our grips unbreakable for 30 seconds.

Better, everyone got a level. Except for me, of course. That pushed Lana high enough to unlock her class. She was so excited, she jumped into Scott’s arms again in a full-body hug and plastered a kiss on his lips, just like she had after we escaped the Maze Fiend.

This time he was ready and held her to him, kissing her back. After a moment, she tried to push back, but he said, “Nope. You can’t just randomly kiss me like that again without paying a price.”

“Like what?” she asked suspiciously.

“Dinner. Tonight when we get back. My tent.”

She kissed the tip of his nose. “Bueno. Deal.”

While Lana reviewed her class choices with her team, I scanned my achievements. Ignoring the kill notifications, I spotted a couple worth reading.

“Congratulations, Lucas! For breaking the reproductive cycle of the Blinking Jackrabbits before it could accelerate exponentially and become an unstoppable tide that would have swept all life off of this stage, you receive a platinum Malthus loot box.”

It contained a single item. A pole sword, similar to the one Bristleback had used like a driver to hit me across half the stage-1 central valley. This one had a haft that felt like polished stone, with a dully gleaming steel sword tip.

“Naginata of the Trebuchet. Epic. Extremely durable, this naginata deals an additional 50% pure force damage. May imbue a single swing with Siege Strike.”

“Siege Strike. Magnify your strike with the power of a siege weapon, adding 10 times the impact and penetration damage. Cooldown: 1 hour.”

I whistled softly and shared the description with Tomas and Ruby.

“How do you get an epic weapon from a platinum loot box?” Jane asked.

I shrugged. “As if I’m going to complain.”

A couple of my titles upgraded loot boxes. Trailblazer gave me a 30% chance to get a loot box upgrade. Maybe even though the grade of the loot box hadn’t upgraded, the loot inside had. Either way, it was a great weapon.

I tossed it into my inventory. I definitely saw uses for that one. I welcomed any and all new weapons, although it wouldn’t be a main go-to. Naginatas weren’t my style.

We gathered at the edge of the forest farthest from all the bunny and mandrill gore to rest. I shared some donuts, pastries, and buckets of fries. As everyone ate, I surveyed our group and smiled.

“Well done, everyone. You all fought well and I think we’re jelling as a bigger team. I am confident you’re ready to tackle the dungeon.”

“Thanks, Dad,” Tomas said, saluting with a donut.

“He is our default leader,” Jane said.

“All hail our mighty chief,” Steve called around a huge mouthful of cake.

I wanted to protest. I wasn’t trying to assume command over everyone. It’s just, I was stronger and had more experience than any of them so far. Did that make me a leader?

Ruby nudged me with her shoulder. I’d been so stuck in my own thoughts, I hadn’t noticed her approach.

“You are,” she said softly, as if reading my thoughts. “You’ve worked hard to help every one of us. You risk your life for ours and look out for us. Look at what you’re doing now? Leading us into a dungeon you found so that we can level with you. Those are the actions of a leader.”

“No one voted for me,” I protested.

She stepped closer, placing a hand on my arm, her smile soft and warm. “No one needed to. I’m glad you’re here to take on the role. We need you.”

“Thanks.”

She winked and added, “My fee for one custom pep talk is another chocolate-frosted.”

“Deal.” I happily handed over the donut. She saluted, took a big bite, and walked off. Behind her, Steve gave me a big thumb’s up. How was he always right there at the perfect place and time to do that?

Lana didn’t need much time to pick her class, and settled on High-Stakes Ventriloquist. It effectively combined and magnified her existing crossbow and self disguise abilities, magnifying them and opening up new options. She looked really excited about it.

“Congratulations,” I told her. “Ready for the dungeon?”

“Claro que si,” she grinned.

Andy rubbed his hands eagerly. Ruby had patched him up in less than a minute. “One more level, and I get my class too.”