Star Trek: Picard Episodes 4 and 5 - re:View

Come on, man, Alex Kurtzman wasn't bullying anyone in high school.

I kinda agree that basically when I was 15 and really into Star Trek it wasn't cool, but the fuckers who are in charge of it now are the same kids who bullied the 15 year old me but discovered Star Trek isn't that bad in their 30s, but also don't actually get what it's about.

I posted about decorating your vagina with glitter. This is a confusing response.

Joe Bloe

At least that would inject some fucking life into the franchise.

Rick Drake

Haha! The dumpster fire graphic on the marquee is a nice touch. Poor Star Track. How can Eugene Roddenberry sign off on this sacrilege?

Mike St Louis

There is a character in Episode 5 who looks like Deanna Troi named Bjayzl. There was a pop culture thing in the UK about a decade ago called "vajazzle", pronounced almost identically. I think this is the showrunners trying to let us know Marina Sirtis has a sparkly, glittery cooch.

Joe Bloe

I've never been into star trek at all... But I love your reviews of star trek and Picard. Mostly, I think I like knowing how out of touch Hollywood is with source material.

May the Schwartz be with you.

Steve Can Still Believe

What did you expect dude? Nothing escapes the Kurtzman Effect if its within his sphere of influence. There is an equation somewhere that if you are within X degrees of Kurtzman the effect will be more pronounced.

Kellic

I was really hoping Mac was going to whisper out of the dark. NOPE.

Kellic

That diarrhea montage. It's been a long time since I've cried from laughing.

Amy Hitchner

Star Trek is dead. Star wars is dead. R.I.P. my youth! Well, there is another Dune movie to look forward to - but we all know how these turn out. On a brighter note: Love RLM and all the abuse the take - or pain they live through. They care!

Pyke82

47:23 Worf's look on his face sums up all that is Star Trek today!

Pyke82

Mike and Rich - you might appreciate this recent Michael Chabon story. I was at our local theater in West LA with my wife. I was buying popcorn and I immediately noticed the guy in the line next to me was Michael Chabon (because he also dresses like a dipshit in real life so is hard to miss). My wife and I are going into the theater in the hallway when I notice he is right behind us. But there is an ancient old lady in front of us (we're going to see Emma, btw) who is probably about 105 with a walker. You can imagine how slow she is. She's taking up the entire hallway into the theater. Behind us, Michael Chabon audibly groans. The movie still had 5 minutes before it started. About a microsecond after she hobbles into the open theater, he whizzes past us. My wife goes, "Jesus, that guy is a total asshole." I then was like, "That guy makes the new Picard show." And she goes, "Well doubt you're enjoying it then." She was right.

Unrelated have y'all watched avenue 5, tis fun

Tomas

Wow, that part about Manu blew me away. I sincerely love when Mike gets deep.

I've a theory .. they made Picard just so they could see the reaction in review

Tomas

Next time Mike and Rich do one of these, they should have cuts to Jay watching something he's actually enjoying.

Andrew Proue

Holy shitballs... and we thought they couldn’t do worst than Discovery.

Lelio Mulas

Maybe one of these days you can do a re:view of the former ugly child of the franchise, Star Trek Enterpise.

Burke

Great video, as always. I have said it before, but you guys really are the best commentary on what Trek has been turned into.

Burke

Yes. All of the changes in current Star Trek have been done for no good reason. What changed that this career diplomat suddenly acts like he doesn’t know anything about diplomacy? Change and growth is reasonable and expected but we need more than no explanation, which is what we got.

Katy

The thing is, I don't think Mike hates doing these at all. He is so pot committed to Star Trek as a fan that he almost feels a responsibility to cover every Star Trek show or movie no matter what. Rich on the other hand, definitely hates these and looks absolutely miserable. Even the one word answers he gave to any attempt by Mike to start some sort of discussion about these episodes felt like Rich was just bored and wanted to get this over with.

Star Wars is too self-referential and nostalgic, but Star Trek is too different from previous incarnations?

Simia Canis

Their slow descent into madness is pure joy.

Michael Federico

these thumbnails just keep getting better and better

Jacque M. Ferguson

Anyone else hoping they continue these for the rest of the season just to see how ridiculous the thumbnails get? I don't even know what's happening with this one, MIke is apparently Cyclops from the X-Men and Rich is in blackface crying blood.

Is Mike threatening us by suggesting that he'll bring on Maculkin on the weekly Picard reviews if Rich won't join him? What a terrifying possibility, I shuddered when Mike said that at the end.

I don't care where or when I watch your videos. I'm just happy to contribute to Mike's waning sanity.

John Radoff

So... there is Eli Roth- and Lucio Fulci-esque eye violence in "Star Trek" now...? :/

Manuel Johnen

I like the intro of this re:view. Cutting through redundancy. Now that "Star Trek" is about to hit rock bottom, I wonder, what of Lazarus? What? I mean, I wonder, will the spirit of Gene Roddenberry's Star Trek be ressurected at some point after the franchise has hit rock bottom?

Marvin Falz

Guys, you dont have to keeping doing these. Just post a sign that says "We hate this. It isnt Star Trek." You both look really miserable. Just stop.

I hope Jay does about eight Re:Views of his creepy giallo movies to make up for this.

Rick Drake

Patreon is the one says it's "Patreon Only." It's a dumb quirk of the site.

Rick Drake

Bullshit! You guys were just trying to catch up on ST:D.

Newtz

So I am wondering when they are going to do a re:View of Star Trek Galaxy...

Yahsho Jinn

I can't believe how fast the turn around is for these episodes, amazing fucking content. $15 a month is so WORTH IT

hamish smith

Liked the fact that I got this notification 12 hours after the episode was published (watched in the first hour, on Youtube). It's OK, Mike, i'll listen to you talk about Star Trek, and altough I care as much as you, I feel the same as Rich.

Also Picard is frying your brains so it's understandable

Guilherme Müller

Bribing us with botw !

Declan

Nothing quite says "you should drop your patreon subscription" like a "patron only" video linked half a day after it went up publicly on youtube.

Joe Bloe

good thing I was so distracted by the immense sexual tension in the new vid 😤😤

Drake Martin

I think there's an angle you aren't considering - maybe Picard has space dementia

smh y'all lucky you're cute

You hacks!

Aaron Von Seggern