Pizza O'Clock: Making An Ass out of Hiring (Preview)

“So!” Roy cleared his throat, Kira sitting at attention. “Nows, let’s talk position! I’ms dinkin’... youse be perfect fors da server job!”

And then, Kira was back to confusion. Server? Like a waitress or something? She couldn’t possibly be good at that! She could probably bust tables, but that? She would probably be better in the kitchen given Riley’s praise for her cooking. Maybe she could work in the back with accounting and management since she was taking courses on those.

Also, now that she thought of it, she didn’t really specify what position she wanted when she applied, did she? Better fix this. “I’m not so sure about the server position. I-I’m not great with keeping up with pacing and ha-haandling orders. Maybe I can work else-”

“Nonsense!” Roy chuckled, getting up. He walked beside her and gently patted her shoulder. It was surprisingly soft and relaxing. “Youse’ll be perfect! I’s can tells. All youse needs is sum more confidence ands a lil’ self-assurance, hun!”

It was nice of him to say that and have such faith, but Kira really doubted that. However, before she could say anything, the beaver grabbed the walkie-talkie on his belt. “Heya, I’s gonna need ones special hirin’ personal pan in mah office.”

Personal pan? Is he hun- Creeeeeeak. The office door opened and in strolled a toon hippo, one she’d seen when she’d first arrived. He waddled over to the desk and dropped off a steaming, small pizza on the desk. He gave the two a small nod before leaving just as speedily as he showed, shaking his keister from side to side.

“Huh, that was fast.” Kira looked at the small sausage pizza. It certainly looked cooked and fresh, but that couldn’t be possible. How good, or even safe, could it be given that it was apparently made in only a few seconds?

“Thanks!” Roy chimed, not noticing her apprehension, “We heres at Pizza O’Clock pride ourselves ons deliverin’ our grub inta ours customahs maws quick! It’s alls ‘bout toon efficiency ands speediness heres!

“Anywho, eats up! Consider it a hirin’ bonus!” Kira looked at the beaver and then at the small pan again.

Eat this? Sure, it was a very small pizza, less than half a foot/fifteen centimeters in diameter. However, Kira was worried. I don’t have a plate, any napkins… what if I get my clothes messy? I’m not sure if I should… but would it be rude if I don’t? He did get this for me and-

“I’s get ya!” Kira looked back at Roy, who was nodding to himself. “I’s see dat look on yours face ands totally understand! Youse don’t have ta say a word!”

Wait, he understands? Oh that’s a reli-

“Dis pizza is much too small! Ya needs sumding bigger fors yours tummy! I’s was bein’ silly gettin’ ya someding dis small! Here, let mes-”

“N-n-no!” Kira loudly declared as he reached for his radio, “I’m good! This will be just fine!” She reached over and pulled one of the slices, steam billowing off as melted cheese stretched long. “I’m gonna eat it now!”

Holding the slice with both hands up to her face, she got a good whiff of the pizza now. Her eyes lit up, her jaw drooping. Whoa… that smells good! Like, reeeeeeally good!

Her nose shuddered before taking a deep sniff of the hot fumes rising from the cheesey slice. The scent of it grew more enticing, more delectable by the second. Her nostrils began turning dark brown and bumpy, the color and texture spreading to the rest of the sniffer.

Kira could feel a bead of drool at the edge of her mouth as she held the slice. She didn’t even try it yet or even wanted to a second ago, but now? Gurrrrrgle. Her body was craving it. It wanted it badly.

It’s just a piece of pizza. Nothing more. I’m being silly. Kira noticed Roy watching her. He was back behind his desk but leaning over it intently. His wide beavertail swung back and forth like an eager dog. Probably look sillier not eating…

With a deep breath, she bit into the tip of the pizza.

Her pupils dilated. Sausage, smoked to perfection! The cheese and sauce are blended and balanced togethah purfactly! Dis dough is soft and tender, all da grease soakin’ in ands enhancin’ dat flavor! MmmmmmHMMMM! Dat is heaven!