Photo by Anon

I've been on quite the tour. The weather has been up and down, and I either spend my time shooting, driving or sleeping. It's intense. But the people I meet and the places I see are unbelievable. It's been so long since I've seen snow! The houses in Pennsylvania are so close together. I past a Mennonite church selling honey, been driving through large purple mountains of dead trees, and climbed through the window of an abandoned cultist apartments/school building thing. I really don't understand what that building was. It's been kinda amazing. I'm glad ( and horribly sad) that my shoots for today cancelled for various reasons. It's cold today and my body hurts all over.. I really need the time to catch up on sleep and eating healthy. My self care and peace of mind is long over due. I have bruises from posing on hard surfaces, splinters and scratches from trees, rocks, and broken things, and my muscles ache from use and shivering in the cold. I like the adventure and physical exertion from creating. I wish it were easier to have a balance, find time to rest myself and my body between my work. If I traveled for longer I could rest more, but with COVID it gets more dangerous to stay in any particular area. I also miss my family. In many ways I'm lucky my relationship fell apart so at least I don't feel guilty about not being home as much. I told myself I'd take a break from modeling for a bit when I finished this tour. I still will I think. I say it, and then every time an opportunity falls in my lap or my mind feels re-inspired. But I really do want to catch up and try some new things. I like working with people, but I have some creative projects I've wanted to do for a while. I also have wanted to build another career. This pandemic, if not most of life, has shown me the importance of a Plan B-Z.