on performing without a plan

when i get asked to perform, there's generally two different options for what folks will ask for. option one is a tight 10-ish minute act. these tend to be more drama more main stage. they have lights and music and some sort of planned "choreography". that "choreography" is absolutely necessary to fit some sort of flippy dippy sequence into such a short amount of time, let alone a flippy dippy sequence with a storyline. this sure does satisfy the BFA degree bb in me but this shit is HARD. option two is a longer format option-- maybe 30 to 45 minutes and more freeform. sometimes i get to choose music, sometimes not. sometimes i get to turn up the drama, sometimes i'm more ambient and blend-into-the-background. for this version, i generally prefer not to plan too much ahead of time. i find this to result in the most authentic performances, and because of this the most exciting to watch performances. i find my very best performances to be just well negotiated scenes.

kitten and i recently did a performance for the Hot Stuff release party that falls into the second category and boy oh boy was it FUN. we had just about 30 minutes and permission to do whatever we wanted. we also had... an inability to schedule a time for a rehearsal in the weeks leading up to the date. alas, "well negotiated scene" it was. here's a little peak into some of the things that make that possible for us:

• it was loud in there. i also stuffed a sock in kitten's mouth a few minutes in. so what happens if she needs my attention? we use a signal that i call "flashing hands" (think aggressively opening and closing your fists several times in a row) if she needs my attention immediately

• we do very subtle check ins before big transitions or for common placement issues. "is this ankle wrap good" tiny head nod, transition

• kitten and i tie together a lot and i know her tells very well. i can almost always predict an adjustment she'll ask for before she asks for it. but i also know how to push her buttons, and where many of her edges are. i also know that adrenaline is one hell of a drug and that most people's pain tolerance will skyrocket on stage. so i've got a responsibility of not pushing her too much.

something i love showing when i perform in this format is the "this is how i actually tie" of it. yeah, you'll see me second guess a choice or two, you'll see us do a check in or two, you'll see me adjust and fix things for her. you get to see me make decisions in real time, you get to see how sometimes those decisions don't work. performing like this feels ultra vulnerable because it is so sincere. yes we are doing a HotThingTM, but you're seeing the guts of it too.

the entirety of this photo set coming shortly. photos by the oh so talented @pixelvixenimaging