Done Adulting Vol. 2 Ch. 29

“It’s been two days, Jamie,” Becky reminded him. “It’s only going to get worse if we wait.”

“But I don’t want to,” Jamie reminded Becky. He’d been pretty clear on that.

“I don’t want to either. One more day, and I’m taking you to the doctor.” Jamie hated going to the doctor. There were too many shots and grabby nurses. “And they’ll just do the same thing. Would you rather have me do it or them?”

That was no real choice at all. Jamie sat on his changing table naked from the waist down and didn’t say anything. If he couldn’t decide no, he didn’t want to decide at all. “A few more hours,” he whined instead.

“No,” Becky said softly, “let’s just do it right now. I promise I’ll be gentle.” Becky lifted him off the changing table and put him on her hip.

“Where are we going?”

“Let’s do this on my lap. That’ll be nicer, won’t it?” Jamie’s response was to lean against her and grimace while she collected everything she needed in one hand. Sitting down in the rocking chair, Becky spread a changing mat across her lap, a diaper over that, and lastly Jamie. She set the enema bottle down next to her on the floor.

“Don’t be scared, Baby Bear. Just lay back.” This was actually Jamie’s favorite way to get his diaper changed, laying across her wide, warm, and soft lap. But why Becky always felt the need to give him an enema if he didn’t have a bowel movement for two days perplexed him. Sure, it was uncomfortable being backed up, but less drastic remedies like a fiber supplement or stool softener were never tried first. She always resorted straight to an enema. Jamie chalked it up to being another expression of bigs’ weirdness around Littles and their potty habits. It was thankfully rare that Jamie was irregular. The breast milk kept him moving too often and too loosely most days.

While Jamie acquiesced to this treatment now, he fought it the first time to the point of tears for both himself and Becky. Only when Amanda pleaded with him, and held his hands – gently enough to be reassuring but firmly enough to keep him from struggling – did he let Becky do what she needed to.

Jamie lay on his back with his arms folded over his chest and looking toward his closed door. He was embarrassed that Ella was on the other side of it somewhere with Amanda. It would have been easier for him if he were, like her, actually incontinent as Becky assumed he was. At least then this treatment would be something like natural, and he wouldn’t feel so ridiculous for being in diapers and being given enemas when he failed to use them for two days.

“Okay,” Becky said as she took his ankles in one hand and the enema bottle in the other, “up we go.” She tilted him back, raising his bottom off the diaper under it. “Relax, baby,” she whispered. Jamie did his best to stay loose as the tip of the bottle started to work its way in. He clenched his eyes as Becky got the nozzle seated. “Gonna be a little cold. We’ll go real slow.”

Jamie squirmed just a little as he felt the cool water enter his bowel. Becky kept her word and squeezed the bottle gently, letting the water very slowly drain into him. Jamie couldn’t help himself and started to sniffle, a solitary tear escaping his right eye.

“You’re so brave,” Becky said. “You’re so brave. Almost done … There. I’m taking it out now.” Becky removed the nozzle and set the bottle down, lifting Jamie’s diaper between his legs before lowering his ankles back to her lap. She lovingly taped the diaper closed while smiling down at Jamie. She subtly cocked her right foot upward so Jamie’s bottom was higher than his belly, letting the water flow further in. With her left hand she ran her fingers through his hair, and with her right she rubbed gentle circles on his tummy. Jamie fought the urge to push the water right back out, knowing if he did Becky would repeat the process again.

“No need to cry. Who’s my good bear,” Becky cooed to him. “Who’s mama’s bestest, most handsomest bear? Huh? I think it’s Jamie Bear,” Becky said as she picked him up and laid him against her chest.

Jamie wasn’t sure what about the process, other than the discomfort, always seemed to make him feel emotionally vulnerable. He certainly felt scrutinized as Becky would keep a very close eye on him until he finally passed something. He wiggled and then leaned in closer to Becky when he felt his tummy cramp. Becky kissed the top of his head and patted his bottom, wrapped in an overnight diaper at midmorning.

“You wanna go play,” Becky asked. It could be a while before it took effect, though she knew Jamie’s answer.

“Uh-uh.” He never wanted to go play when she gave him one of these.

“Okay,” she said and rubbed his back. “We’ll just sit here for a while.” Feeling crummy, Jamie stayed on Becky’s shoulder until he fell asleep. She gently lifted him into his crib, put a diaper cover on him, and left, quietly closing the door behind her and switching on the little monitor she had recently purchased at Stacy’s urging. She couldn’t believe she’d gone four years without it.

Manda and Ella were seated on the floor playing keep away with Kazoo. An Amazon or little caught in the middle of keep away would feel so hurt and left out, but a dog thinks it’s the best thing ever, at least until he finds another best thing ever.

“Is Jamie sleeping,” Manda asked.

“Yeah,” Becky said as she sat down on the couch. “He didn’t wanna come play.”

“He’s still kinda shy about that,” Ella said. She had promised Jamie a long time ago that she would never say anything to Becky about him not needing diapers, or not needing them once upon a time, but she always wanted to. She liked Becky, she respected Becky, but it was one way in which Becky was a typical big to the detriment of a little.

“Shy about what,” Becky asked.

Manda intervened, saying, “Just about having poopy diapers. It embarrasses him a bit is all.”

“It’s so cute that he wants to be like a grown up big,” Becky said. She thought for a moment and said, “You know what it is? Sammy was over here the other day in pull-ups for the first time. Jamie’s probably wishing he could have big boy underpants someday, too … But littles are littles. We’ll just have to make sure he knows he’s our special guy, diapers or not. He shouldn’t compare himself to bigs anyway, physically,” Becky said. Ella concentrated on keeping the stuffy away from Kazoo, hiding the side eye she’d flash Becky if she wasn’t careful.

Surprising herself, Manda said, “We could, maybe, try to potty train him, if he wants to, I mean.”

“That would only end in tears,” Becky said wistfully. “He’s perfect the way he is. You, too, sweetie,” Becky added as she reached out to tousle Ella’s hair. Ella just blinked.

Amanda sighed and ran her hand through her own hair before grabbing Kazoo and flipping him over, tickling his tummy the way she tickled Jamie’s. Instead of squealing and trying to get away, Kazoo’s eyes rolled back in his head and he kicked his legs furiously.

They heard whimpering coming through the monitor. Manda started to stand up. “Sit,” Becky said, “I got him.” Ella watched the peculiar smile on Becky’s face as she stood and walked back to the nursery. She shook her head and pondered that Jamie, who could be so volatile at times, though less so than in the early days after his arrival, had turned into quite the cry baby. She didn’t begrudge him that anymore than she begrudged him the other trappings of littlehood, but she thought on how fragile his feelings could be at times, yet how strong at others. But away from daycare and prying eyes, when it was just his family, things like a little upset tummy were enough to make him weepy. It was like Ella’s mother had said about Ella’s father: men turn into babies when they don’t feel well. Becky even took to banning certain movies from the house for Jamie’s proclivity to fall to pieces at sad endings. The one about the yellow dog from his world had ruined everyone’s day.

“Hey,” Becky whispered as she slipped back through the door and gently shut it behind her. “You didn’t sleep very long.”

“It hurts,” Jamie whined. Now he was wishing he’d expelled the enema as soon as she got the diaper on him instead of letting it take effect.

“How can I make you feel better,” Becky asked as she stood at the rail of the crib and reached down to rub Jamie’s tummy.

“Ugh. Ugh.” Jamie tensed up, and Becky hid a smile, knowing he’d feel better in a moment.

“There’s my good boy,” she cooed at him. “Such a big boy.” When Jamie seemed done for the moment, she lifted him out of the crib, placing him against her shoulder and patting his butt. “Who’s mama’s poopy bear,” she asked, making him blush.

“I wanna change,” Jamie whined.

“Not yet,” Becky said as she gently bounced him. “When we’re sure you’re all done we’ll give you a nice, warm bath.” She waited patiently, pacing the room with him in her arms, shushing and encouraging her little boy until he was all done, and happy to her very middle to do it, to help him feel better in his tummy and to ease the discomfort and embarrassment by her quiet voice and soft hands.

Lauren and Danny could have the joy of watching Sammy grow up. Becky had the joy of Jamie never growing up, always needing her, always being her little boy.