Done Adulting Vol. 1 Ch. 80

“So you’re good with this,” Becky asked as she put in her earrings.

“Yeah. Definitely,” Jamie answered. He wasn’t really certain he was good with it, but he understood she needed a life outside of their home, and so did Amanda. It was just that the two of them happened to be needing that life on the same evening.

“It’s just that you’ve never gone to sleep without us before.”

“I know. Are you sure you’re good with it?” She seemed nervous leaving him with a babysitter, the last and only time having gone so poorly, but also because he was her little and had never not been there to give his goodnight kiss.

“Yeah. Of course,” she lied.

“Hey, buddy,” Amanda said.

“Hey, Manda.”

“Can I steal him and get a guy’s opinion, Mom?”

“Go right ahead.”

Jamie hopped off the bed and followed Amanda back to her room. She held up two outfits against herself, first one, then the other, then the first one again. “Well?”

“The purple.”

“You’re just saying that because you like purple.”

“It’s pretty on you.”

“Aww, thanks, buddy. You sure you’re okay with this?” Jamie rolled his eyes.

“Of course I am. It’s not like spending an evening with Mel will be a hardship.”

“Ha! I thought you might feel that way. I’m leaving her my car in case the two of you wanna go somewhere.”

“So who are you going out with anyway?”

“Just some friends from class.” The doorbell rang. “That must be Mel. Promise me you’ll behave yourself tonight.”

Jamie rolled his eyes, again. “I promise.” What did she think he was might do?

Amanda carried Jamie downstairs where Becky was letting Mel inside and thanking her again.

“Really, Becky, I love hanging out with Jamie. It’s my pleasure … And speak of the little devil! Hey, Jamie,” Mel greeted him as she bent down and ruffled his hair while he sat on Amanda’s hip trying not to seem as excited as he felt to be alone with her. “We’re gonna have fun tonight, aren’t we?”

Jamie blushed. “Yeah.” He was feeling more than usually awkward and shy. Just the two of them for the evening.

“There’s money for pizza,” Rebecca said. A horn honked.

“That’s my ride,” Amanda said. She kissed Jamie on the cheek and passed him to Mel. “Sleep tight, kiddo. I’ll be here when you wake up tomorrow.”

“Be safe, baby,” Becky said as she kissed Amanda on the cheek on her way out the door.

“I will, Mom.” And then it was the three of them.

“So, do you have any questions,” Becky asked.

“No. I think we covered it all on the phone.”

“All the important numbers are on the fridge.” Becky looked at Mel. Mel looked at Becky.

“I think the two of us have got it under control,” Mel assured her.

“Well,” Becky said, not moving toward the door. Jamie broke the impasse.

“I want a goodnight kiss, Mommy.”

Becky’s was pleasantly taken aback. “You never call me that.” She kissed him.

“I know. I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Goodnight, baby. Mel, I won’t be far. Don’t be afraid to text me.”

“Go have fun.” Becky bashfully backed out the door.

Alone now, Mel shifted Jamie so her hands were under his arm pits and held him out in front of her as though appraising him.

“What,” Jamie asked, feeling like he was being scrutinized.

“I just thought I’d look you over. Get a sense of what I could get for you.”

“And?”

“I’m guessing eight cents a pound.” Jamie still didn’t know the currency and wasn’t sure if that was good or bad. “But I think you’re worth more to me just so I can do this!” She flipped him so he was lying flat across her forearms, popped open the buttons on his sleeper, and blew giant raspberries on this tummy while he squealed.

“Mel! No fair!”

“What’s no fair,” she asked as she came up for air before diving back in for another lip-puckered blow on his taut tummy. “Okay,” she said when she was done and his laughter subsided. “But don’t think you’re getting one of those on demand every time I see you.”

“I didn’t want the first one,” he protested.

“That’s not the story I’m telling, and it’s your word against mine. You ready to go?”

Jamie, confused, asked, “We’re going somewhere?”

“To get pizza.”

“O. I thought she meant, like, order in.”

“Do you want to stay in? We can do that too.”

He sort of would’ve liked that. He was already in his pajamas, and he really just wanted to be with Mel, but Jamie couldn’t say no since she seemed excited to take him out. “No, I’d love to go out with you.”

“Great! Do you need a jacket?” The evenings were starting to get chilly. Jamie might have said yes, but his fuzzy-warm sleeper, after she rebuttoned it over his belly, felt like it was enough, though he did feel awkward leaving the house in pajamas.

“I think I’m good.” Mel took Amanda’s keys and the diaper bag from the foyer where Amanda had left them, and the two of them got in the car.

“This looks familiar,” Jamie said from the backseat. He couldn’t see much, but what passed by wasn’t new. “Where are we going for pizza anyway?”

“Prester’s. It’s a family place, and it’s pretty good.” Jamie had been to a family pizza place a few times as a kid and remembered them as noisy, full of kids, clinking quarters, and parents with harried looks and pitchers of beer. He liked the notion in theory; there was something wholesome about parents taking their kids out for pizza on a Saturday night. Checkered tablecloths, ignored salads, half-eaten crusts, dim lights, a flow of kids coming and going from the game room.

Mel got Jamie out of his car seat and took the diaper bag. “O,” Jamie exclaimed.

“What?”

“I recognize this place now.” It was in the same strip as A little This, A little That, the first place he’d gone out in public. “We went to that store.”

She was carrying him toward the restaurant. “Did you like it?”

“Uh, well, sorta hard to say under the circumstances.”

“We can go in there after dinner, maybe see if there’s anything you need.” They reached the door, and it wasn’t as loud as Jamie expected it to be. It was mostly empty.

“Two, please,” Mel told the hostess.

“Right this way.” The young woman led them to a booth.

“It’s quiet in here,” Jamie remarked after they’d been seated. Mel sat him on the same side of the booth as herself. There were two other families in the restaurant, each with very young kids.

“It’s early for dinner, unless you’re a little or have little kids,” Mel explained.

“O. I guess that makes sense.”

“What do you like on your pizza?”

“Pepperoni.” Jamie was a simple little. He didn’t need any fancy toppings.

“Me too.”

“Are you ready to order, or do you need a few minutes,” asked a waiter who appeared from the kitchen side of the booth.

“I think we’re ready. I’ll have a personal pizza diavola, and he’ll have the same for a little. And just water for us.”

“O, didn’t see the little fella back there. He’s a cutie,” the waiter said. Jamie blushed. He wasn’t used to people calling him cute, or even thinking he was cute, especially strangers.

“He knows it too,” Mel added. Not being used to it didn’t mean Jamie didn’t take advantage of his alleged cuteness from time to time. “Can we also get some crayons and a couple placemats to draw on?”

“Sure thing.” The waiter disappeared.

“I don’t need any crayons,” Jamie said, trying to sound a little more mature than he appeared in this situation.

“Who said they were for you?” The waiter returned with crayons, placemats, a water pitcher, a glass, and a sippy cup. “I may need your help,” Mel said. She put a placemat in front of both of them and scattered the minibox of crayons in front of them. “Can you help me fill all these in?”

Jamie smiled; he knew what she was trying to do. On their day at the mall, she’d picked up on the way he was being a little littler than usual with her. Now she was trying to encourage it. He liked that she did that. They could be mature friends and she could encourage him to be a little at the same time. It subconsciously affirmed that being a little didn’t mean he had to give up being all the other things he was.

It was a hard balance to strike, but Mel had a way of making it easier, and Jamie knew at least part of that was because she was pretty and he was attracted to her. But it was also the way she treated him, similar to the way Amanda did but with a little more leeway for mischief, like a fun aunt who wasn’t as bound by the need to be an authority figure. Not that Amanda was much of an authority figure, but she had responsibilities to Jamie more intense than anyone except Becky.

“Here. I bet this makes it easier.” She picked Jamie up and set him in her lap so he could see and work better. She bounced her knee and patted his back. “Good job! That’s very nice.” All Jamie had done was fill in the front of a house with his blue crayon. “Blue was a very good choice,” she congratulated him.

He sat in her lap coloring the placemat and doing the maze and the word search and the crossword puzzle with her encouragement. She gently pointed out clues or showed him strategies that he was already well aware of. She smiled at his cleverness and complimented his successes.

“Two pizza diavolas. One for the lady, and one for the little gentlemen,” the waiter announced when he brought their dinner. Jamie started to scoot over.

“Where do you think you’re going,” Mel asked. “You’re perfect right where you are.” She used a knife and fork to cut a piece from his pizza and then held it by the crust for him to take a bite. He hesitated. This was new and unnecessary and they were in public, but he wanted to make her happy. He leaned forward and took a bite from her hand. Sauce got on his chin, and strands of mozzarella wouldn’t let go as he pulled away, but the explosion of pizza goodness in his mouth made him forget everything else.

“Omygud,” Jamie said with his mouth full, “This is so good!”

“I thought you’d like it.” She fed him a whole slice before she began picking at her own. “You’re a messy eater, Jamie, did you know that?” She wiped his chin and face. “Here.” She took a small plate and served him a slice, and he fed himself none too delicately. The little food was going to his brain as fast as his belly, and both took on the warm glow of contentedness.

“You’re not gonna save room for dessert, are ya?” Mel laughed watching Jamie’s eyes droop as he finished another slice. She put her arm around him. “What? You done talking?”

“No ... I’m just happy to be with you.” He leaned against her.

“Aww! Me, too, Jamie.”

The restaurant was starting to get busy with the normal dinner crowd. He nibbled on another slice while she finished hers, both with plenty of leftovers to take home. She paid the tab and hoisted Jamie to her hip. “Uh-oh,” she exclaimed. “Someone wet his pants. Was dat chu? Did you wet your pants?” Jamie blushed and said yes, and just as she hadn’t meant to baby talk to him, he didn’t mean to smile sheepishly when he answered.

“It’s okay. I’m sposed to,” he grinned at her. Between the pizza and her company, Jamie was feeling carefree and flirty.

“Yes, you are! Why don’t we go to that store, and I bet we can change your pants in there a lot more comfortably than in here.” They walked toward the other end of the strip and into the big box store. Mel headed straight for the changing room.

She laid him on a changing table and buckled the straps around his belly and chest. “Don’t want you falling off,” she said in a high voice. She unbuttoned his sleeper and pulled his feet from it, rolling it up under his back and exposing his wet diaper. “You’re not all that wet.” Mel untaped his diaper and folded it down after pausing in case the fresh air made him pee, then she thoroughly wiped him clean with a wet wipe before lifting his ankles and doing the same to his butt. “You have got the cutest tushy.”

She pulled the used diaper from under him and disposed of it, then pulled a clean one from the bag and tossed it over Jamie’s eyes. “O no! Where did Jamie go?” She picked the diaper up. “There he is!” She repeated it until he giggled. “Where’d Jamie go? Dere he is!”

She taped the clean, soft diaper around him after applying a little baby powder, taking the chance to spread the excess on his tummy. “And you smell so sweet, baby boy.”

She redressed him and lifted him to her shoulder. His knees drew up under him so she was holding all his weight. She kissed his head. “Let’s go see if there’s anything you need.”

She placed him in the seat of a cart, and he smiled at her. This had become an even better evening than if they’d stayed home. He didn’t have anything to say; he was just glad to be with her, feeling warm and safe and fuzzy from the company and the heavy helping of little food.

“O, I know what you need.” She reached into the diaper bag and found his binky. He smiled as she introduced it to his lips and parted them just enough for her to insert it. If it made her happy for him to have it, he was happy to take it for her. “Aww. You still got a little sauce on your cheek.”

“He’s just perfect,” a woman said. Mel turned and saw a woman with her own little in a cart, sound asleep. “What is he, about infant stage?” Jamie’s face flushed but he tightly grinned behind his paci. It somehow seemed a compliment, like his ability to look like any other little were a skill, and this kind stranger thought he had mastered it.

“Something like that,” Mel replied.

“Wonderful, isn’t it? How it doesn’t end. She’s been my little girl for years,” the woman said, caressing the sleeping little’s cheek. “She’ll always be my angel.”

“And you’ll always be hers,” Mel added.

“That’s right.”

The woman walked on, and Mel turned her attention back to Jamie. “Let’s see if we can find you something.”

She cruised the aisles past plenty of things he didn’t need or already had before arriving at the toy section. “You know what you’re missing, little boy? You don’t have a ball, do you?”

Jamie didn’t. “I don’t think so,” he mumbled around his pacifier.

“Every little boy should have a ball.” Mel picked up a rubber playground ball. “Do you like this one?”

“Mhmm.”

“Me too.”

They walked back toward the checkout. “And you know what else,” she said, “You need some fun diapees. Less of those plain white ones.” She started to riff. “I mean, sure, those are good for business meetings and formal weddings, but a cool guy like you needs some cool diapers for everyday stuff.” Mel turned into the diaper section and slowly cruised up and down its four aisles. “Which ones do you like?”

Jamie recalled doing this months ago with Becky. If his brain wasn’t swimming in whatever is in little food, he might have marveled at the change in himself and his circumstances. “Those, please,” he said, pointing at a multicolored package. Mel took it off the shelf.

“Coddlers Variety Pack: for little boys who like everything.” The package showed diapers with padded littles playing sports, diapers with the grey bunny on it, diapers with a fuzzy red animal on them, diapers with trucks and airplanes. Mel read from the package: “The perfect diaper for extended daytime use. Extra-high leak guards to handle anything little boys can throw at them. Guaranteed to give him the cutest diaper butt ever.” Mel tittered. “I think you need a whole box of these,” she told him and put one in the cart.

“It looks a little late for this guy,” the checker said. Jamie was tired. The little food and the hour had him past ready for bed.

“Yeah, he’s going straight into his crib when I get him home.”

Once home, Mel carried Jamie inside and set him on the floor of his nursery while she got their leftovers and his new ball and box of diapers out of Amanda’s car. She made a bottle for Jamie and took it and a nursing cloth into his nursery.

“You about ready for sleep, buddy?”

“Yeah,” he yawned, wide and long.

She chuckled at how adorable he was when he was so sleepy. “C’mere, baby.” She picked him up and sat down in the rocking chair, cradling him in her arms. She teased his lips with the bottle. “Can you open up for Melissa?” He nodded slowly, his head heavy, and parted his lips enough for her. “There’s my good boy.”

He drank very slowly until his body was limp and his breathing slow and the formula was about gone. Mel shifted him to her shoulder. “Still dry,” she said, patting his butt on the way to patting his back.

She sat with him balled up on her chest with his legs curled under him. She rocked and rubbed his back, smelling the sweet formula on his breath and the airy aroma of the baby powder she’d rubbed into his skin and the sweet and pungent smells of his nursery. She turned her head down until it was almost resting on his, ready to fall asleep with him.

He turned his head toward her and started to nuzzle into her. “Woah, Jamie,” she gently said, shifting his head away from her breasts. “Nothing for you there, buddy.” His head instinctively turned back, and he nuzzled into her. She turned him away again. “Jamie? Are you awake? Sweetie?” He didn’t make a sound.

“I guess not,” she whispered as she gently stood and laid him in his crib, quietly pulling the rail up.

Mel was working on her leftovers a couple hours later when Becky returned. “Hey, Mel. Was he good for you?”

“Perfect like always.”

“Ha. That’s what you think. Thanks for watching him.”

“Happy to. You want some pizza?” Becky accepted half a slice.

“Did you guys go out?”

“Yeah. We ate in the restaurant and then went into the little store and got him a ball and some new diapers.”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t realize he was running low.”

“He wasn’t. I just thought he might like something more fun to wear. The ones he picked out are so cute.”

“He picked them out,” Becky asked, surprised. “When I took him there, he picked out the white ones he wears during the day.”

Mel shrugged. “Maybe he’s finally figuring out he’s a little, and littles wear fun things. And the little pizza probably helped more than a little.”

“Maybe.”

Mel thought for a moment. “Hey, Ms. Webb,” she said, suddenly formal. She hadn’t called her that in years. “You’re not, uh, nursing Jamie, are you?”

“O, no. He’s never shown any interest in that. I mean, maybe if he were regressed, but...”

“Huh.”

“What? Did he say something?”

“No.”

“Why do you ask?”

“After I fed him his bedtime bottle and I was rocking him, he, uh ... he nuzzled into my chest. Twice. Once after I turned his head away.”

“O goodness.” She was mildly embarrassed. “I hope he didn’t offend you. I’m sure he didn’t mean anything by it. Did he say anything?”

“Don’t worry, I wasn’t offended. He was asleep the whole time. He’s never done that to you?”

“Not once. I’m … I don’t know. I’m surprised. He never acts that little.”

Mel looked a little chagrined. “Well, I guess maybe I do kind of encourage that in him sometimes.”

Rebecca was intrigued. “Like how?”

“Like ... He sat in my lap during dinner, and I helped him color. We played peekaboo while I was changing his diaper.”

“And he let you do that?”

“He liked it.”

“He hated it not long ago. At least with me.”

“Maybe he’s growing down a bit, so to speak.”

“Maybe,” Becky ruminated, “Though it probably helps that you’re a pretty twenty-year-old. I bet he’d do just about anything for your attention.”

“I didn’t do anything wrong, did I,” Mel asked, concerned she’d pressured him.

“Not at all, sweetie. Trust me, if Jamie didn’t like something about the way you interacted with him tonight, he wouldn’t have been shy about saying so. I think it’s good he feels so comfortable with you that he can let himself behave that way. It’s healthy for him. In fact ...”

“What?”

“It would be good if he could do that more often is all.”

“You don’t want to regress him, do you?”

“Absolutely not. I just want him to be able to let go, not be so serious, just, ya know, have no more worries. And his therapist told us helping him find ways to be comfortable behaving littler would be good for his other issues.”

“Yeah. Amanda told me about the other issues,” Mel grimaced. “I think he’s in the right place.”

“I’m glad he’s comfortable being so little with you. I just hope he can be that way more often someday, whenever he wants.”

“I bet he will.”

“Hope so,” Becky said noncommittally. “It’s late. I bet you’re ready to go home.”

After Mel left, Becky tiptoed into the nursery and, quietly as she could, gave Jamie his goodnight kiss.