Rejection and Celibacy Were Never the Problem

Jennie Young invented a new dating method called Burned Haystack Dating a year ago. The movement “blocks to burn”. We’re all looking for a needle in a haystack, and to find that needle, we must simply burn the haystacks by blocking anyone who doesn’t meet our criteria. It’s a simple idea. It’s hardly novel, but Jennie put it into words, and they resonated with hundreds of thousands of women.

Her Facebook group has been picking up an interesting trend this week. Women have been receiving messages like this en masse:

> “I only talk to those who verify they are real FIRST. Send your phone number to talk on the phone. I’m free with no plans and looking to go out tonight. Let me know because I will unmatch in 15 minutes if no response.”

This week, a Fetlifian sent a similar message to a friend: He only speaks to women who agree to sex prior to the date, so she was expected to make this decision before she’d even laid eyes on the guy.

It seems fuckboys now they have their own burned haystack method: Agree to fuck tonight or you will be burned.

This isn’t the first time I’ve heard the claim that women on dating sites aren’t “real.” We hear it from Fetlifians all the time. What does “not real” mean in this context? Well, it means “down to fuck”. If you own an Only Fans account, you are probably not down to fuck, therefore you’re considered a literal bot.

An old school caretaker said he frequently received reports that profiles weren’t real because the women who owned them didn’t dispense sex as expected. Life is getting tough for straight men. Sex is not being dispensed when they push the button. This is a great injustice because not getting the sex is a form of suffering, the likes of which the rest of humanity has never experienced.

And those meting out this injustice can’t possibly be averse to having sex with incels, so the only explanation with any credibility is that they aren’t real people. This isn’t happening because straight men are facing a sex drought. It’s happening because some straight men believe they’re in a sex drought that’s entirely unique to them.

You, Mary, are not in a sex drought even if you haven’t had sex since 1982 when you were still wearing legwarmers. You, Cindy, aren’t in a sex drought even though your husband hasn’t been in your bed for years. Jessica, Jemima, and Jade are all women, therefore they’re getting plenty of The Sex™. If you own a vagina, you get sex every day if you want it. Our dating site fuckboys legitimately believe that all women get sex on tap.

If you’re one of them, allow me to demonstrate. The last time I got laid was during COVID. That’s an awfully long time ago. In fact, it’s around five years, and even in my over-sexed body, I don’t experience it as torture. I simply adapt and get on with it. I find fulfilment where I can. I build a rich lifestyle and invest in my friendships. I correct my thinking around sex and view my life through a rational lens.

The difference between me and Incel Eric is not how much sex we’re having, but how we’re thinking about it. Eric thinks it’s unjust. I think it’s life. Eric thinks it’s torture. I think it’s better to have an internal locus of control. I am in command of my life and my brain. Rejection and celibacy were never the problem.