Just a Special Snowflake Sub

In my lifetime, I’ve floated from sub to bottom to slave to slut to brat. This has brought me to who I am today: a devolved knot of confusion unable to stick a single label on myself. I’ve erased the orientation from my profile and became a vague and noncommittal “bottom”. My fetish list is a mess of comic kinks because my true fetishes are too fluid to list. They evolve with every partner. I can’t meet you with a head full of emptiness and surrender if I’m dictating how we play. “What do you want?” is my favourite question as a sub, and, in many ways, it’s my only kink.

I need a dom to get to know the vanilla in me before he starts playing with the sub in me. My first dominant did exactly that. When he found my inner slut, he lifted it out and dominated it. When he noticed I drew out the protector in him, he lifted it out and dominated with it. He saw that I want to follow, so he gave me something worth following. He noticed that I was suggestible, so he became a marionette who pulled the strings in the subtlest of ways. The skill of it felt like magic.

In short, he didn’t ask me to comply with labels. He simply dug the “me” out of its ditch.

When that relationship ended, my kinks returned to zero.  

I love being used, so I don’t dump a list of fetishes at the feet of a new dom. If he gets giddy over something, whether it’s pain, degradation, or rope, the odds are excellent I‘ll get giddy about it, too. If he doesn't get giddy about something, nor do I. Does that make me a slut or a slave? Does it make me neither? I don’t know, but I don’t care either.  

Fuck the ‘special snowflake’ pejorative. We’re all special snowflakes.

Labels are odd things. They can guide or limit you depending on how you use them. I, for one, am done with them. I’m a special snowflake and so are you. John Baku, can I please have a role to click on that's 1000 words long?