SpanishRed

The Kink Scene is a Baby Boomer Conference, Not Slut Christmas

Added 2024-01-09 07:24:15 +0000 UTC

Norman took a short right at Tinder and landed up here, where there are sluts lining the walls with their legs wide open. It’s easy to get laid when all the women are kinky. That’s what Norman thinks, anyway, so he begins offering sexual favours to random Fet women. He thinks it’s Christmas, and all the tinsel is flying in the wind. He’s sure to get laid any second, now. Did you know you can just freely request blowjobs ‘round here? I mean you can do it on Tinder, and this is Slutville, so you should be able to get away with even more.

Norman thinks the kink scene is a five-year-old’s Christmas morning, but it is, in fact, <cue jaws music> a baby boomer conference. You have to be adults when you’re in the kink scene. You’ve got to develop a mature understanding of consent and boundaries. We aren’t Christmas. We’re General Electric's Annual General Meeting.

My mother used to work for them, so I can tell you it wasn’t even a little bit fun. She designed motors but spent most of her work hours in meetings. That’s how we are in the kink scene. We spend 10% of our kink time actually playing, and 90% of it learning, toy shopping, vetting, and attending munches. Oh, and talking about consent. We really like consent in these parts. We talk about it every day.

If you want to do well in the kink scene, you’ve got to value consent as well. If you don’t, people will get angry with you. If you can’t get nursery school right by treating people respectfully on the internet, how are you going to handle the university-grade consent of a CNC relationship?

You can’t, so you’re still in nursery school. This is when you learn to keep your penis in your trousers unless you have explicit consent to take it out. The kinky weekends only happen after you’ve completed high school. And as long as you’re harassing women online, your reputation is going to be, well, nursery school. So when you go to a play party, you’ll struggle to find play partners because you’re still learning how not to be a creeper.

You have two choices:

Learn.
Insist that there’s nothing wrong with sexual harassment because this is a kink site.

Option two will leave you without a Friday night play partner. Option one has a good chance of leading you to Slut Christmas. Respectful men can do well in the scene. Many of them get to tie up rope bottoms every weekend. You see, orgies and high-protocol dinners usually have closed guest lists. There’s a reason for that. We. Are. Vetting. You. You can resent us for it all day, but you’re still not getting into the orgy, so it’s not going to do you much good.

You have two choices: