A Brief Delay, For The Better - Update 1/4/2026

Hey all, hope all's well! Hope you had a wonderful holiday~

So, at the start of last month, I made some promises, that a more complete cut of Haruspex would be posted by the end of the month, as would the 97 Poets script. I am sorry to say, that did not happen.

Quite simply, after finishing the last preview, I could feel both my body and mind asking me to rest. I had been pushing myself for a while now, in no small part because I've been excited to see the summary completed (at least to some extent). I was drained enough though that I ended up canceling plans to attend a LARP I had been very hyped for, because I could tell I was just spent.

While very little of it is public yet, I have never had a more productive year than last year. Over 100k words written and 8 hours of video edited, and that's JUST the stuff for the videos. 2025 was maybe the best year I've ever had creatively, but in that enthusiasm I pushed myself quite hard for quite long. What I felt wasn't burnout, but it was the path to burnout, so I made the decision to give myself the holiday to recharge.

Fortunately, it's done wonders! And in some ways I hadn't anticipated.

There's the predictable results, of course - I've still been playing games, reading, researching, and all the fun parts of this job. Notably, I played through the recently released Unbeatable and absolutely fell in love with it (to my surprise tbh), so much so that I've already written a couple thousand words about it. That will likely be after that Wanderstop video, cause I have a vision and a need.

It's given me a chance to spend time with games not as tools for work, but, ya know. games. Did you know games are supposed to be recreational??? I also played through basically all of the Sonic games. For me. Frontiers was really great, actually.

That said, I don't mean to imply that I did nothing work related. There was editing done to polish up the 7 hours of Pathologic we currently have, quite a bit of research completed for future projects, and things have come together for my irl filming space. Also took the chance to completely rework my streaming set up from the ground up, which we'll get to in a minute.

And then we have gray zone stuff, which is my way of saying that I've been spending a great deal of time on stream with DemilyPyro. Not my content, but most certainly about 20 hours of content heavily featuring me, including a full playthrough of Unbeatable with very emotional finale. I was there to support a friend and for the fun of it , but it has definitely been a great learning experience.

On that note:

Without spoiling anything, I will say that I have very good reason to believe that I will be getting a key for Pathologic 3. Regardless of whether or not I do though, I have every intention to stream it the day P3 drops over on my own Twitch channel. I will likely blow through the whole thing over the course of a couple days straight.

This is something I was on the fence about for a while, but streaming with Demily has not only helped solidify it, but reminded me that I do actually really, really love streaming. It's fun! I think I'm good at it! It can give me the chance to play games I've been otherwise struggling to find time for or want to share without putting in a month of work to do so! and it would mean that I'm not just vanishing for a year at a time! It's something I both want to, and should, be doing.

So consider this me recommitting to it. I know I've said this before, but I think being able to approach this from a more casual perspective has allowed me to finally figure out the point of failure I kept tripping up on.

To be blunt and personal for a moment: I am a trans woman, as most of you likely know. I am also an actress, so I have a lot of experience and comfort being on camera. However, I also have my dysphoria triggers that I get anxious about, whether or not I have visible stubble for instance, that often make prepping for a stream an hour long endeavor. This does not pair well with ADHD time-blindness, as you might expect.

However, on Demily's streams, I've just been using the Patho rantsona as my talk sprite (or Reactive if you're exacting about terms) and have found it quite liberating. It frees me up to focus on what I'm saying and engaging with rather than how I might look and lets me focus on the game and stream itself.

All of this has brought me to a somewhat obvious solution: I'm just gonna use a mix of both. On days where I'm confidant, comfortable, and prepped, I'll be on camera. For days where I'm not, or just don't have the time/energy/desire to put myself together, I'll use the Pathosona. Will she eventually become a vtuber model? Possibly, if this becomes a consistent thing, but for now that remains a distant consideration.

Either way, at present I feel the excitement again, both to get back to work on the Haruspex videos and beyond, and to commit to something new!

So I offer my deepest apologies - not for resting, but for breaking the promises I made. I am however very confident it'll end up being best for the overall health of the projects, the channel, and myself. Definitely give the Twitch a follow and keep an eye on it over the next couple days, will definitely be doing a warm up stream to make sure everything's in working order before the Patho3 stream. Maybe a couple Hades runs, we'll see.

I'll also be uploading the End of Eva video here to Patreon this week while I continue to figure out what I want to do about the claim on it.

Thank you for your patience, and I hope I'll see you for my first experience with Pathologic 3. I'll be back not long after with something big~

See you then,

Ruby <33