December Exclusive - "Ready" - Part 2

I wake up cold.

I wake up naked.

I wake up with Katie’s face hovering above mine, her hair tickling me. She’s beaming. “Wake up, sleepy-head!” she says. “You’re gonna miss Christmas Eve!”

I don’t like her tone. She sounds like she’s talking to a child younger than herself. Like she’s talking to a nursery-schooler. But when I lift my head and look down, I discover that I have bigger problems.

I am a child. And I am a girl.

“Wuh…wuh…” Breathless, feeling as though the bed is spinning, I grab the sleeve of Katie’s dress and whisper, “What is this?”

Katie’s forehead wrinkles. She looks disappointed. “Oh.”

I sit up, cover my crotch with stubby hands. The only thing I have more of now is hair, I can feel it reach my shoulders. I am a little girl.

“It’s okay,” Katie says gently. “You’re okay.”

I shake my head. I want to curl up in a ball, I want to hide under the blankets. But I can’t do that. Despite how I look, I’m still the grown up in the room.

Why isn’t Katie upset? Why hasn’t she called for help? Where’s Mum?

I look at her. Just a little girl in her Christmas Eve dress. She’s spent her life looking up to her dear Uncle Robin, and somehow my transformation has given her little more than a frown.

“What did you see?” I ask her. I can’t remember anything after sitting on the bed.

“Well,” Katie begins, and her tone is different. And I can read her, read her like the book lying on the bedroom floor. She’s thinking about lying.

I stare at her, try to look as authoritative as possible, which, I’m sure, isn’t very authoritative at all. “I need the truth, Katie.”

Another frown from my niece, and the she makes a huffing sound. “Fine.” She sits down beside me and takes my hand. “You’re all so tiny,” she says with a faint smile. “Like a doll.”

“Katie.”

“Okay, okay.” She rolls her eyes, and I remember her doing the same thing earlier. Two years time, she’ll be a teenager. Plenty of eye-rolling then. For now, she still looks very much a child. Albeit a child that looks over me.

“So…” She makes another huffing sound. “Thing is, Robin, it’s a bit of a waste of time me explaining it all.”

I stare at my niece. “What?”

“Well, you won’t remember it.” She sits primly, knees together, hands folded in her lap. “I must have got it a bit wrong, which is why you sound a bit grown-up still.” She smiles at me with a mix of shyness and pride. “The physical part, well I got that totally right.”

“Wait.” And now I have a sense of why she hadn’t called for help, why my mum and in aunt aren’t in the room. “You did this?” I wave up and down my body, and I no longer care that I’m naked. Because this body isn’t mine, it’s a fake, an illusion. I should pinch my round belly and wake myself up from this nightmare.

“It’s like a Christmas present I gave to myself,” replies Katie. And she doesn’t sound embarrassed, as if she might have done something wrong, and she doesn’t sound worried, as if she might just face dire consequences.

“What are you talking about?”

There’s some noise from downstairs – the turning on of the Hoover – and Katie looks towards the bedroom door. But despite what she’s done, she doesn’t look worried.

“I told you already,” she says, with a decidedly impish grin, “before you took your little nap.” She sweeps at her skirt as if clearing invisible crumbs. “I’m too old for dolls.”

I feel my face warm. “And so you made me a little girl?”

Katie nods. “Exactly!” She pats my chunky thigh, without any concern for my physical privacy. “You know what? I was a little bit cross when I saw you still had our grown-up thoughts, but now I think it’s for the best.” She leans in to whisper in my ear, “I was so excited about the spell, but I didn’t have anyone to talk about it with.”

“So my Mum…she doesn’t know? I look toward the bedroom door. Once Mum turns off the Hoover, I will test my lungs, I will scream like a little girl.

“Oh,” Katie says. “Well, she knows you’re getting little, sure!” She nods her head theatrically, and I can hear a hint of her condescending tone. “But she doesn’t know about the magic.” She glances to the door and says, “She thinks you did it yourself.”

My jaw drops open. “What? Why the…why would she think that?”

Katie shrugs. “Because I sort of told her that.”

None of that made sense. “And why would she believe…” Because of magic. Because of some impossible spell.

“Katie, you have to stop this. I’m not really a child, and I’m definitely not female.” I tug on her arm and say urgently, “I want my life back.”

Katie looks at my hand and bats it away. “Don’t be silly.” She holds up the sparkling dress I’d asked about before. Is that for your doll? “You’re only saying that because I haven’t finished the spell.”

I wriggle my way to the wall side of the bed. A precious couple metre between me and my niece, as if that will make any difference. “And you’re not going to finish it.” I point at Katie, and do my best to keep my finger from trembling. “You’re going to turn me back.”

Katie looks truly confused for the first time since I woke up. “Why on earth would I do that? I got what I wanted, you perfect. Mum showed me some photos of when you were little, and I knew you’d be perfect. I mean, you’re the girl version now of course, but that just makes you even more perfect, because I can dress you up and you’re going to look so pretty!” She takes the dress and strokes the material. “It’s one I wore at Christmas years ago. When I was three.” She gives me a confident smile. A perfect fit for you, even though you’re a little bit fat, because so was I at that age. Do you remember?

I fold my arms. I still feel cold, but there’s no way I’m wearing that damn dress. “Where’s your mother?”

“Out shopping,” replies Katie off-handedly.

“And does she know?” I ask.

“No,” Katie says. “Mum wasn’t in the house when I did the magic, so…” She waves her hands. “Oh, it’s too complicated to explain.” She gives me the same smile I saw when I woke up. “But it’s okay, sweetie!” Her sweet tone has returned, and I can feel my mind tingle with a mix of revulsion and attraction. “We’re going to get you all dressed up, and then you’ll be ready to show your pretty dress to Auntie Claire when she gets back from helping Santa Claus!”