Getting it Over With

You had to poop. You had to use your diaper for the most humiliating act possible. But you had no choice… right?

Getting it Over With

It was only a matter of time until you had to do this.

You stood up from the crawling position you’d taken on the floor, adjusting yourself so that your legs were slightly spread apart. The diaper between them was already soaked, a result of multiple bottles of formula you’d been fed this morning by the caretakers in the day-care.

Your partner had dropped you off here rather than carpooling you to work. You’d barely been able to get a word in edgeways. They’d suddenly been so strong, pulling you into the building and leaving you in front of a group of motherly women. They were the same, like they were Olympic weightlifters capable of carrying your adult frame with nary a second thought.

You’d complained initially, but what was the point after a few hours? They clearly couldn’t understand you, they just picked you up and put you where they wanted you to be. Your mouth was filled with a pacifier now after you’d made too much of a fuss at breakfast and thrown your oatmeal off your highchair.

Now it was time for the ultimate act of humiliation. Even though you’d seen others like you, all adults turned to babies, doing this around you all morning you had hoped that you could avoid it until whatever force that turned you this way was finished. Someone up there was laughing, that was for sure…

The gurgling had started half-an-hour ago. Your initial thought was it was just a bit of gas, the bottles of milk having been regular since you’d decided to make a mess of yourself at breakfast. Apparently that hadn’t been a good idea. While others were allowed to get solid snacks of fruit and little juice boxes, the caretakers had kept saying you’d been “desperate to go back to your bottle”. Total nonsense of course, you’d wanted to avoid having to eat the slop you’d been presented with, rather than just being fed it out the colourful bowl. In hindsight going along with it like some of the other panicked adults in the room would have been the better option, but at least they now had some solid food in them.

By contrast you could feel the heavy, thick liquid pooling in your stomach with every gulp. You'd been lying on the lap of “Julia”, or whatever her name was, drinking the stuff down with your arms trying to pull it free to no avail. She’d thought it was cute that you wanted to hold the bottle by yourself.

“After breakfast I think it’s best we make sure you get something in your tummy” is what she’d said, forcing you to consume the entire thing in a ghastly ritual in front of all your supposed peers. They were now all crawling around over on the other side of the playpen while you were standing firm, keeping yourself from falling into the same trap, of giving into the urge to just avoid crawling around and instead to keep yourself on two feet.

Of course, you’d had to crawl around to play with any of the toys. They were designed to be played with on the floor, and it wasn’t like there was anything else to do. You could’ve run around the whole playpen for hours if you’d wanted to. But why would you? At least this way you could keep your brain occupied.

A cramp hit as you felt yourself starting to squat down. Some of the others hadn’t even bothered to stand up to do this. One of them had been playing with the same small car toys that were scattered on the floor around you and had just pushed out a load in double quick time before heading back to his playtime. Apparently it was easier to adjust to this for some here than others. You’d see one of your group mess at breakfast, throw a complete desperate tantrum in their highchair as their world seemed to come crashing down around them before they’d groaned, pushed themselves up out of the seat and gritted their teeth. That seemed to take an age by comparison, the poor guy crying as he sat back down in the mush that had settled in his diapers.

Now it was your turn to feel that same horrible feeling around your nethers. Soaking a diaper was one thing, you’d already released your bladder earlier without any fanfare, keeping it as quiet as you could and out of sight of the caretakers. Some measure of privacy was important, it meant you weren’t just going to be seen to give in or let go without a degree of control over what others could judge you for, even in present circumstances.

A quick glance around yourself to check for more of the caretakers seemed to imply they were all dealing with something else. Julia had been your nemesis today and she was seemingly out of the room dealing with something else. The others, all of whom were cleaning or dealing with the full pants of some other unlucky soul, had their hands full. You had a clean break…

Wrong choice of words.

You sighed as your knees bent a little further and your fists started to ball up. Yesterday you were doing this on the toilet, a quick push and it was all out of you, a regular occurrence that would likely never have been stored in your memory. Instead, it now came to mind, reminding you of where you should be right now. Not standing on top of a plush carpet in the middle of a day-care with a red face and a stomach full of milk, but in your office toilet and taking a poop on company time, checking your phone and taking a little longer than needed just to get off a few extra sneaky texts to friends or your wife.

Where the hell was your phone anyway? Once you’d got in you’d been stripped down, so you guessed it must still be in your old pants right? Maybe if you could get to it you could…

Another cramp hits, this one joined by a feeling of your buttocks separating. At this point, any attempt to reach a toilet would be futile, not that it mattered. You’d already resigned yourself to this, enough of your fellows in the playpen had asked and had requests to use it rejected and you were already on the bad books of the caretakers. They’d probably pretend like they couldn’t understand you, ignore all your pleas and potty dancing and just watch as the back of your diaper filled with the contents of your bowels. They probably wanted you to embarrass yourself that way, in front of all the others, the most babyish act of all being performed like a play for everyone.

But you’d kept to yourself, playing with some toys in a corner. You could hide the act from everyone, avoid any attention and get it over with. After that you’d just have to ask for a change and get into a fresh diaper. You could avoid having to sit down, avoid having to worry about waiting for a check while you waddled around in your own mess. It’d be over almost as quickly as it started, whatever horrible result that sat waiting to be wiped off your butt efficiently dealt with by those who had decided it was their job to do it.

A little grunt came from your mouth as your teeth clenched and your stomach muscles fully contracted, pushing the mess past your sphincter and giving your brain a kick of relief as you could feel the lower part of your colon emptying slowly. Potty training was a hard thing to kick, your body was still desperately trying to hold it in and while wetting was a quick release followed by a sudden flood, this was clearly going to require substantially more effort.

Another grunt, another push. This time there was definitely a sense of something leaving your body, your mind trying very hard not to give into the desire to clench things shut. Doing that would just make everything harder, either it all came out at once or it would be a horrible smushy lump in between your cheeks that any caretaker would recognise as a sign of more to come once the smell was detected.

Another push, this time with a big outwards breath that you tried to keep as quiet as possible. Now it was happening, you were messing your diaper and were well past the point of no return, enough was past the exit that you’d basically have had to release the rest even after an attempt to stop. It would have hurt more to keep in than keep out, even to your pride. A little fart left your backside, sneaking past the mess as if to announce to your diaper what was on the way.

Your next grunt was definitely audible to anyone within earshot as you tried to force the entire log out in one fell swoop. Your legs decided now is a good time to give out and you fall to the floor with your hands out, resting on your knees, returning to the crawling position you’d just left. Every second now felt like minutes as the slow movement of the mess from your butt to the diaper was all you could feel. Eventually it smushed into the padding, a crinkle coming from the back as it expanded to accommodate the mush that you were being forced to put into it.

Another long drawn breath and grunt, then one final push. You felt the rest leave your butt with an almost shockingly quickly feeling of relief as your rear closed up and was able to clench for the first time since the experience began. You could feel that relief as a shiver that went up your spine, a little smile inadvertently coming onto your face. You’d done it, you’d pooped your diaper. Messed your pants. Filled your Huggies. Packed your Pampers…

“Ah, right on time!”

You looked up. There she was, your nemesis, the woman that had decided that you were her little baby for the day. A small growl came from your lips as you crawled backwards, trying to pull yourself up onto your feet again to bring yourself up just below eye level with Julia. The weight at the back of your diaper was screwing with your centre of gravity, your legs trying to adjust to the new droop and squishy lump that was forcing them apart. You were only a few inches shorter than her, but as she reached around you to pull the back of your waistband, you couldn’t have felt any smaller, any more like the toddler you resembled.

“Your tummy is such a funny one. Maybe we need to adjust your formula intake…” she let go of the waistband, the mess swinging under your butt as the smushy lump fully left the back of your butt and just dropped into the bottom of the drooping padding. You started to pull away but Julia’s grasp was far too strong and before you could do anything further your legs were pulled up into the air as she rested you on her arm. Instinctively you hugged into her, grabbing onto her shoulders to stop yourself from falling backwards. Your diaper was smushed up against your butt again, spreading the mess around and coating your buttocks. You grimaced and groaned, trying to get the words out to make some semblance of a defence, but nothing would come.

“Come on stinker, let's get you over to a changing table. The rest of your friends have all been poopy today already, you’re the last one!”

Something akin to pride welled up inside you before you tried to slam it down again. You’d managed to hold it longer than anyone else. You’d managed to be the least babyish of anyone else. But you’d still done it, you’d still left a distinctly uncomfortable mass in the back of your diaper, one that was still warm and horribly sticky. Less than thirty seconds later Julia had laid your back down on a cool plastic mat, raised off the floor above a cabinet of diaper changing supplies that were scaled up and absurdly babyish. Primary colours for all the bottles of baby powder, lotion and wipes, diapers so thick that they could barely be stacked more than five high. A strap was placed over your stomach, keeping you in place while Julia busied herself with getting the various supplies ready.

“Now, I know this morning must have been a little tough for you. First days at day-care are always tough for infants”

Infants? You were… you were…

How old were you?

“But since breakfast you’ve been very well behaved. Turns out we made a little error there, you were always supposed to have a bottle of formula rather than the oatmeal. It must have been quite scary for you to have to eat something you’d never had before…”

That wasn’t why you’d thrown it away! You’d had no idea what was going on! You didn’t want a bottle of formula you wanted…

“We made sure to get your routine in order after that, I’m glad you got used to playing with the toys in the corner, it kept you out of trouble with the older kids. They can roughhouse some of the younger ones sometimes…”

No! You’d been trying to get away from them because you were bigger than them! Because they were all babies! You weren’t a baby, you were a big…

“You were having such fun, the girls and I had to decide whether to bottle feed you and interrupt your playtime. Obviously we had to keep to your feeding schedule, but I guess that’s why your tummy took a little while to get going”

No! You’d held it! You’d been a big kid and not pooped yourself all morning! Wait… is that what big kids did? Did they still poop themselves?

“In the end it worked out! All the other bigger babies had gone poopy before you and it meant we didn’t have lots of little stinkers to get through in one go!”

But… but… you’d kept yourself away from them because they were stinky! You didn’t want to be a stinky baby too!

As Julia finished collecting everything she started to un-tape the front of your diaper. Your hands instinctively went to push hers away, trying to keep some small sense of dignity.

“Now now, I know little babies sometimes like being poopy but we don’t want you to get a rash now do we?” she pushed your hands away easily, grabbing at the huge tapes and pulling them free. You could feel tears starting to come to your eyes as she pulled the front down, showing off your wrecked diaper and poopy rear to anyone who happened to be looking.

“Oh dear! Looks like you really had to go hmm?” she started to rub your tummy, eliciting a small moan from your mouth as the diaper was pulled out from under you. Julia wiped upwards with the back, pulling most of the mess free and leaving your butt just smeared with the accident.

“What a cute bottom you have! Once we get it all clean anyway…” she grabbed some wipes and started to draw them across your rear. You shivered as the cool wetness made contact with your skin, your legs starting to instinctively squirm around. Even as you felt desperate embarrassment, you could also feel relief that the mess was going away this quickly, just as you’d wanted.

“Let’s get some powder on you now hmm?” she started to dust down your crotch with the sweet smelling contents of a bright blue bottle. The scent wafted into your nostrils, an almost instant sense of relaxation kicking in. Your arms went limp and your legs stopped squirming as she rubbed around your nethers, making sure the entirety of your diaper area was coated in a thin layer of talc. This was… this was nice…

You felt your legs getting lifted into the air as your eyes closed and the world around you started to feel less and less important. You were getting your diaper changed because you’d pooped yourself. You weren’t here by accident, you’d ended up here because you weren’t able to stop yourself from using your pampers like a baby. The thick padding of a new diaper was pushed under your back and the wings were pulled out to either side of you, your eyes fully closing as you started to enjoy the feeling of Julia checking everything was properly in place.

“Annnnd…. Up we go!” she pulled the front of the diaper onto your front, a smile appearing on your lips as the final part of the process was started. Julia gave the front wings a little pull before grabbing the new tape on the left side and securing it tightly. Almost instantly a feeling of safety came over you, you were in your new diaper, after pooping the last one. It was a good thing. It was right. The second tape came over more quickly, finally completing the change and leaving you a grinning, gurgling mess on the table, your thumb having made its way into your mouth.

“Such a good baby! Yes you are! Yes you are!” Julia undid the strap and picked you up, rubbing her nose against yours and eliciting another giggle. Your eyes opened again to look at her, now without a sense of fear or hate. Just a sense that she was here to take care of you, to change you out of your messy diapers when you made them, to feed you bottles when you were hungry… to… to…

“Now, I think it’s naptime. You already look like you're starting to drift off…”

If Julia said anymore you either didn’t hear it or didn’t understand it. Your eyes closed again, shutting out the light of the day-care as you hugged close to her chest, sucking your thumb and awaiting the softness of a crib mattress….