A situation that will be the most powerful song of all

Piano training started six months ago for several projects.

The time that I cannot play the piano increases because I am busy with other things that I have to do.

During this period of time when he is forced to spend his time on other things, he finds that the memory of the nerves that he had put in for the piano is slowly slipping away from his body.

I have continued to feel really frustrated, thinking, "What a waste," and "That's no good. Furthermore, I am now experiencing unexplained numbness that is getting stronger and stronger in my neck, shoulder blades, and right side of my body.

It shows no sign of subsiding despite training and all kinds of treatment.

I guess it's probably due to age, but I wanted it to stop just now, when the deadline was imminent.

But that's the way it is.

Yet another part of my body is also giving me fits.

Unexplained pain in my wrist and the back of my hand also developed, often causing me extreme pain in my daily life.

I can't play the piano to my heart's content, and I can only play it choppily.

But because the deadline is looming, he doesn't wait for his body to recover, but pries time away and forces himself to resume.

No matter how much I am interrupted, I must finish this now.

Fortunately, I haven't developed Meniere's disease. If it gets that bad, it's over. It's now or never.

It's not like being driven. Time, obstacles, and noise must be stopped and silenced, and we must defend to the death the vacuum of time that allows us to face each sound. That is what I must do.

Strong feelings.

Strong obstacles that try to prevent it.

The time that approaches as if it were mocking me for taking the time to do so.

Thanks to the situation in which I have to face all these things, I have no idea what kind of song it will be, but at least it will be a song that is not fun and frivolous, but one that is full of power.

p.s. When I look back at what I just wrote, it seems to me that the soul of a composer different from myself is taking over.

p.s.2 Maybe I get possessed by something depending on the song. Other songs are written in a normal state of mind.

But if you decide to train until you reach this stage, mentally it's very easy, almost like heaven. It's hell to spend time having to wonder.