Jess Vs. Food - Wendys/Mcdonalds

Oh God, I'm sorry for all these food videos. I didn't mean for it to happen this way. I swear this isn't some horrible new passion of mine or maniacal shift in direction. It's just a cruel accident of fate that i ended up furiously producing somewhere between a half and a baker's dozen videos with some variation of Wendys/Mcdonalds/TimHortons/DairyQueen/Etc. in the title, and now all of us are burdened with the terrible, silly spoils of my tragic, hilarious hubris. 

Look, shit happens. Literally in my case, given the vile slop and robot-molded meat-paste i keep cramming down my pie-hole. Life has a way of throwing strange curveballs, and forcing you down a path of increasingly weird shenanigans. One must always expect not only the unexpected, but also the unexpectedly stupid, especially the stupid. Stupidity is the one constant in a chaotic universe. 

No one could have predicted that a fake virus would ruin everyone's life, or that we'd all not be allowed to finger our girlfriends in the back of the movie theatre for a fucking year, or that as a result some of us would have to forsake society, live in the woods, and spend the entire summer making videos yelling and screaming about Wendys. 

We simply play the hands fate deals us and roll with the punches, spacing out our increasingly manic fast food rants over the ensuing months so as not to overload people's delicate sensibilities, by which i mean their totally reasonable and quite sane sensibilities. Sensibilities that say "please god, let this man find a new video game to talk about so we don't have to listen to him cut wrestling promos on cheeseburgers for the next 5 months".

Well don't worry, because the rest of them didn't finish rendering before i threw my computer in a sinkhole and abandoned society. So you won't see any more food videos for a while. That's less a joke than you think it is, btw. I literally live in the woods and i only come out to make these patreon posts via mcdonalds parking lot wi-fi.

This is all my way of saying that I actually for real won't have access to a computer for a while so i busted my ass making the next few months videos in advance. You're welcome. I've got plenty of yellie-screamies for ya, a handful of rantie-banties, some hee hee's, ha ha's, and even a couple ho-ho's for the winter months. 

But that's still a ways off. Next month is October, and you know what that means...