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Bitter Karella
Bitter Karella

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Midnight Pals: Concert

Adam Nevill: so these metalheads are all, like, whoa, if we summon a demon, we'll go down in history as the greatest metal band of all time
Stephen King: whoa! what an idea!
King: do you think that would work for the rock bottom remainders?
Nevill: it's worth a shot
Poe: no it's not

King: think about it edgar
King: summoning a live demon might just be the boost that we need to win the battle of the bands
Barker: i think that's a great idea steve
King: see? clive thinks its a great idea
Poe: yeah? Poe: and what's the track record on clive's ideas?

Barker: hey i never said my ideas were good
Barker: my ideas are FUN
King: that's true, edgar
King: you gotta admit they're fun
Poe: fun for who?
Barker: for me, duh

William Peter Blatty: steve! i heard you were going to summon a demon for musical purposes!
King: i'm considering it
Blatty: don't do it, steve! demons are bad news!
Blatty: and i'm not too keen on music in general
Blatty: it all seems suspiciously protestant

Mary Shelley: sup fuckers
Blatty: mary! steve will listen to you-
Shelley: yeah, he'd better
Shelley: about what?
Blatty: tell him not to summon a demon to win the battle of the bands
Shelley:
Shelley: who're you up against?
King: Ronald Malfi and his Rock Avengers
Shelley: kick his ass

[at the battle of the bands]
King: ok guys we're up next
Barker: steve i don't want to put pressure on you
Barker: but rock and horror legend glenn danzig is in the audience tonight
King: glenn danzig!
King: The only Ohmtown rocker to have a record go gold, platinum, and plutonium in one day!

King: this is big! i can't believe the founder of the misfits AND the director of beloved horror anthology verotika is in the audience tonight!
[in the audience]
Glenn Danzig: kwhat zee how you say predicahmon non? hon hon hon

Ronald Malfi: well well well if it isn't stephen STINK and the rock bottom REJECTS
King: [narrowing eyes] malfi
Malfi: you might as well give up right now
Malfi: we're gonna summon a rock and roll demon LIVE
King: what?! no! that was MY bit!
Malfi: [throwing devil horns] ROCK AVENGERS RULE!!!!

Reporter: Stephen King's promise to rewrite rock history was prematurely and tragically interrupted last night when Ronald Malfi beat him in summoning a rock and roll demon. Survivors described the destruction as "evil," "spooky," and "wow, bad karma, man."

Shelley: and it smelled just like cleaning fluid and made me wanna like WAX THE FLOOR. So like can someone tell me like, is this concert for real, or it it just another rip off?
Barker: I dunno about this, mary, nobody seems to be buying these "I survived the rock bottom remainders" T-shirts

Comments

May I recommend β€œWe Sold Our Souls”

T. Ledoux

Clive will always be my favorite chaos gremlin🀣🀣

Teresa McDonold

Thanks a lot! XD

Bitter Karella

This delightful tale morphed into Rock and Rule so gradually I didn’t even notice!

Jacob Strick


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