THE WAY IT WENT DOWN: TRUST FALLS

There's a silence that falls around a disappearance. A stillness that drops into an investigation when it's gone over and gone cold. An emptiness that bleeds in from the edges until all you are looking at is a blank, white, piece of paper which will never be filled out.

Then, a life of papers, photographs, and bagged evidence in cardboard boxes, shuffled through stale, dusty rooms in the dark. Then, decades later, or sometimes sooner by accident, a purge. This, of course, is the last silence. Permanent removal from the record. The edge of everything. The last time anyone living says your name.

"Dress for a hike...woods," Cal's voicemail said, so I had. It wasn't my first time in the woods or anything. My dad-

But it hurt to think about dad.

I came down here with Cal because he said he wanted to show me something "relevant," so I went. We drove a long, long, time, but he's the boss, and I supposed he knew what we were doing. It was week fourteen for me, and it was going fine, thanks. Except for the Cormier disappearances and FBI Boston field office calling all the time.  

The fucking Cormiers. Jesus. Here's your first case kid, enjoy it, it's seamless. 

Then. Big woods country. Harper Falls and the big smoke, and Duxbury mountain. Trees. Endless trees and the crisp, fall air. Then a utility road. Then the falls beyond it, roaring. No big deal. 

Crime scene? Something for the case?

"Come on," Cal said and adjusted his pistol on his belt. He looked like a woodsman. He marched off into the brush without looking back, so I followed him. That's why they pay me.  

We stopped seemingly at random, and he looked back at me, and there was something behind his eyes. Something not normal.

"What do you think?" He finally said.

About?

"That," he said and gestured.

We were miles from anything real, surrounded by moss-covered trees, the ground covered in dying bushes and dried leaves and then I saw it. Twenty-five feet away. A low-slung wooden structure rich with moss. The shape was-

"Stairs?" I asked because they weren't stairs. Stairs go somewhere. These just rose up from the forest floor and stopped about three feet off the ground. There was no foundation evident in the field, no other remains of s structure. Just stairs in the middle of the fucking forest.

Stairs.

"Come on," he said and headed over to them. Somewhere, I could hear the falls not too far off. We must have looped around. 

"Ok, so I'm going to show you something. And I don't want you to be afraid."

My mind went to the handbook. Was I going to be sitting across from Cal at some inquiry while they stripped him of his badge? Was that what this was? Could he be-

But instead of getting closer, he stepped back from me and gestured up the stairs. 

I went up the steps slowly. Five steps. Nine. Then, the precipice. For some reason, a stupid, uncontrollable smile rose up on my lips and refused to be banished. I stood at the top with my back to Cal, and I could see a plume of water vapor just ahead which must be run off from the falls, mingling in the trees. 

"And?" he said.

"And what?"

"What do you see?"

"See, Cal-" I began to turn back, shaking my head.

"No Jeannie. Eyes forward. Keep looking. What do you see?"

And then I saw them. 

My knees gave way, and I felt for the wooden steps as the world seemed to lurch suddenly to the left and right, like one of those crazy cameras in an action movie. 

"Oh god, Cal, what-" I heard myself say, but my voice was wavery and filled with peaks and valleys.

"Jeannie," he laughed as he helped me down. I smiled uncertainly too, not sure what else to do. When I reached the ground, my body suddenly spun on its own, and I almost got my pistol out. I felt his hands on my hands, keeping the pistol in the holster. I scanned the trees and saw nothing. I didn't see-

"Jeannie. Jeannie. Don't worry. I needed you to see what we are dealing with."

"But Cal-"


"Jeannie, they can't hurt us."

But he was wrong. So wrong. And all I can think about is the last time someone will say my name aloud.