Pengucola

How I felt about my art (and other life stuff)

Added 2021-09-18 22:26:06 +0000 UTC

Hello!!! Long time no see!!! I am pika pikkums Pengucola! I have severe depression and anxiety!! I struggled with self confidence for a while now, to the point where I couldn’t draw without fear. Simple sketches require hours for me. I couldn’t keep up with requests. I dreaded drawing. “They’re going to hate it.” I kept getting feelings like that. For a long time, I felt like I wasn’t deserving of the follows I got on twitter, or my patrons here. I was scared and anxious with everything regarding my art! I think I hid it pretty well, haha! It felt like 2021 has been the lowest for me. I haven’t been drawing much (other than commissions) because of this.

I want to thank everyone who has supported me thus far. Knowing that there are people who support me, and like my art this much, has helped a lot in me building confidence in my art. It’s a little embarrassing typing all of this. I want to be more open.

I’m working on catching up to requests, I ask that you bear with me a little longer!! I injured my wrist ;;

I want to start streaming more often, with patreon requests on the weekends and commission work on weekdays! It’s just that right now my schedule has to line up with another coworkers…pensive…I’m trying to negotiate with my manager about this!!!

That being said, I’ve started to find love in my art again, it may take me a while but one day!! I’ll be super powerful!!